Facing down my demons

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Has anyone ever heard the story of David and Goliath? Those of you who have know how the story goes, those who haven't, gather around the fireplace, kids. I'm gonna tell you a story. The story goes that in the conflict between the Israelites and the Philistines near the Valley of Elah, there was a giant who, twice a day for 40 days, came out and challenged the greatest warrior of the Israelites. The bad part was that none of the Israelites had the courage to face the giant down. So, Saul placed a bounty on the colossus's head. David, while bringing food to his elder siblings, overheard this. He took the opportunity to fight the mighty warrior. Saul offered David armor, which he promptly declined. David took only a sling and five stones he had taken from a brook. David appeared before Goliath. Goliath, in a display of condescension, mocked David. David said to the giant that with God on his side, the giant will fall before him. Mocking him a second time, David readied his sling with a stone, he proceeded to swing the sling around above his head and hurled the stone at the mighty giant with all the strength he could muster, striking Goliath square in the forehead. Goliath, disoriented from the blow, falls over upon his face. David then approaches the fallen warrior and proceeds to remove the giant's head. Moral of the story? David killed a giant with a small stone, I can conquer a few picayune problems that I have. I have almost everything I need. My problems are Goliath, I'm David. I have my sling, my faith, and my incentive, all I need, now, are some stones. I have my objective, I know I can do it, and I have the means of getting it done, what I need is ammunition to get going. My provisions aren't going to be material, but emotional. I need self-respect, forgiveness, enlightenment, intrepidity, and love, in my own heart. It's a slow process, but I'll get there.

Then go and do those things if you think they will help you.

I'm working on finding the stones, but it's finding the right ones and where to find them that's bugging me. This is a philosophical as well as an emotional journey. What does it have to do with dating? These are the problems I'm facing which hinder my ability to become suitable territory for women. Right now, I'm trying to map out a game plan. It's either that, or I become like my father, unable to attract a worthy mate. I know I can do better than loose or disrespectful girls, I know I can let things go, I can learn through experience so I know what to do next time this happens, I can muster up the courage to say "No, I matter, too", and at the end of the day, I do realize their human and make mistakes, just like me.

I wish the story of david and goliath applied when i'm playing basketball. Then I could beat Shaq in a 1 on 1 match.

Teiraa, an aphorism I have always been able to console myself with comes from Nietzsche: Be careful lest in casting out demons that you don't cast out the very best thing that's in you. I think if you carefully reflect on your situation from this perspective you will understand that Nietzsche was right. What we dislike most about ourselves is frequently intimately connected with what we like most about ourselves.

Treating women as people shouldn't be such a herculian task. Good luck I guess.