Tips and advice on getting a girlfriend.

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Hello everybody on WP. I've never had a girlfriend and I'm at present 20. I was just wondering from the wonderful and brilliant people that are WP members, can I please have some tips and advice on getting a girlfriend. Thank you.

Here's a few...

1. Be Confident. If there is anything to be learned from the South Park Movie, this is it. Don't act frightened or shy, because most potentials warrant that to an immediate turn-down.

2. Establish a friendship first. A solid foundation is key to any and all relationships.

3. Don't make an ice-breaker. In my experience, contrary to the movies, this doesn't work, especially if you have a non-standard sense of humor. Just be friendly and relaxed.

4. Don't rant about your favorite things at them unless it comes up in casual conversation. Even then, just say a normal amount of speech. I know I have trouble with this.

5. Use all of your manners. Please, thank you, sorry, etc.

6. Don't ignore your friends when you are with the potential. They will perceive that differently then your friends would.

7. DO NOT visibly hyper focus on them. If at any point they say you are making them uncomfortable, then immediately apologize and give them some time and space. I used to have great difficulty with this.

This is all I could think of from my personal experience. You might want to look into some wikihows for dating or something for more information and ideas. Don't quote me (forum joke).

Bathe regularly, brush your teeth regularly, style your hair to an extent, don't slather on the cologne, keep yourself neat, try to be relatively physically fit. Be polite, ask her questions about herself, don't reveal too much personal information too soon, don't act too nervous. Find someone who shares at least some of your interests so that you've got something to talk about.

I don't find any of the presented advice any good (unless you are NT).

1. Learn to detect compatible girls at a distance (study girls for signs of stims and how they use eye contact).

2. Go to places where there might be compatible girls, and where you can meet the same people regularly over extended periods of time. Do NOT get friends with them first, rather announce you are looking for a gf (nonverbally using the abilities you gained in #1).

3. Alternatively, seek contact with stranger girls and try to set up repeats WITHOUT asking them out or talking to them

To reiterate:

1. Be Confident, not arrogant. If she turns you down, smile, say "Thanks anyway", and go on about your business.

2. Establish a friendship first. Be friendly. Smile. Listen attentively.

3. Ice-breakers are deal-breakers. A simple "Hello" may be all that is needed.

4. Share the conversation. Don't interrupt, and don't monopolize.

5. Manners, manners, manners. Look at her eyes. Don't stare at her breasts. Offer to pay off her bar tab. Ask her to join you (and your friends, if you're with a group).

6. Be inclusive. Let her know that you are inviting her into your social circle, as well as into your life.

7. Be ready to "cut and run" if she shows any reluctance toward getting to know you. Smile, say "thanks anyway", wish her a good evening, and walk away.

8. Practice good personal hygiene. Bathe, brush, and floss. Get a nice haircut. Use no more than a teaspoon of cologne over your entire body. Use scentless deodorant.

9. Mind your appearance. Keep a healthy weight for your age and height. Dress like you're going to a job interview. Stand and sit up straight. Smile.

10. Avoid girls that already have boyfriends or a circle of admirers. Look for girls that are with other girls and introduce yourself to all of them.

11. Go places where there might be compatible girls, and where you can meet the same people regularly over extended periods of time (there's no better way to say this). You can't expect to find girls that share your interests in places that you don't like to go.

12. Don't act desperate. Dating is a waiting game. They will figure out that you're available on their own.

13. Take risks. Seek contact with girls you've never seen before, and with girls you might not immediately jump into bed with.

14. Never express anger or contempt toward the girl's friends, interests, employment, or behavior. If any of these is a turn-off for you, smile, say "thanks anyway" and walk off.

This should do for a start.

I can't do the eye-contact part. That's just painful. I can't notice how a girl makes eye contact because I can't do it myself. I thought most people here had the same problem.

Not sure I agree with establishing a friendship first....if you want to date someone express that initially don't try to play if off like you're just interested in being friends and then later reveal you want more than that.

Well, I find it useful to:

1) take advice from guys who have actually had successful relationships, and

2) also from girls, as they'll give you a clearer idea of what girls want from a boyfriend.

From that, additionally remember all advice can't apply to all people and situations.

Good luck!