Telling a crush you hardly know everything

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I just realized how I could tell / write a crush I hardly know very personal things that I would not even share with my best friend. It's really strange, but I suspect this is yet another ND courtship trait.

Anybody else that has done the same?

I think its just one of your courtship traits not a general ND trait....I certainly couldn't share very personal things with someone I hardly know, even if I did have a crush on them.

I'm sure it is not part of all NDs (nothing really is since neurodiversity is a spectrum). But I think I have read similar things about AS, that they often have problems with being too personal and giving out information they shouldn't give out (according to NT standards). An interesting hypothesis is that this is due to a preference in the courtship area.

I also think this fits well with the observation trait: In order to have something to observe, people need to give out information about themselves without being asked about it. When this is given out in the form of a monologue rather than in a conversation, there is nothing that controls how personal or private you get. It appears that as long as I get positive feedback, I can get increasingly more personal and private with no obvious limit to it.

I tend to be more open with people on the train than with my wife

I was like this with my NT boyfriend and he with me. I think when you both 'click' it just happens

You most likely desperately want to share this side of yourself and a partner is the natural person. It may be a long time between these people too so you have a real need to express yourself. Seems natural to me but try to remember the other person likely is not like this and may be intimidated or uncomfortable. Try to not hold back but play it as a game of reveal, allow them to discover somethings overtime.

It also could be one of your seduction techniques, showing how different you are? Ask yourself that question maybe.

This happened with somebody ND, and extremely similar to me. Initially, I had no idea she was so similar, rather this was something I discovered over time. It wasn't desperation because it didn't happen until after two years of non-verbal game-playing, and it was a gradual process. I'm sure she was neither intimidated nor uncomfortable because she gave me regular positive feedback for doing it.

Apologies I thought you meant right away as you said someone you hardly knew. Over two years gradually seems like you knew them quite well and would at least be a casual friend not a stranger. There is a familiarity there and a patience from you in telling them these things it seems. I have felt comfortable telling a person I have just met if I feel a connection to them basically anything about me, it is rare but has happened. I thought this was what you meant

I did not mean desperation either just a real need to connect with someone on that level, a positive thing

That is what is so funny. In the regular sense, she was a complete stranger because we didn't have a regular conversation. Still, I felt a deep connection to her, and I certainly knew the important things I want to know about a potential partner.



It could have been. I suspect it just came natural to me to tell her a lot about me once I got a chance to do it.



Yes, I think there was such an aspect to it.