obviously now i want a relationship

Post Reply New Topic

with a girl i know how one goes about getting one, theres a couple things, first i have no motivation to get a relationship but i want one. it must sound awfully wierd, but its the truth, second i dont really have any likable qualitys exept what i collect. third i dont drive! girls dont want a man to take them on a date using the bus. why cant this be easy son? its terrible. do you think its easy for normal people to just go out? or what? im getting up there in years and need to find my fawn before she runs away, arf.

Well, going point by point...

1. For some reason some women seem to like it more if guys don't seem like they're out searching for a relationship. I don't get it, but it seems like the few that have expressed interest in me have done so when I'm not in one of my phases where I'm driven to get a relationship. (Usually when I've decided to give up on them entirely. Then someone comes along and gives me hope and screws everything up. ) As long as you think you'd have the motivation to develop or maintain a relationship, the motivation to get one in the first place may not be as important.

2. The great thing about relationships is that it isn't up to you to decide if you have any likable qualities. As long as you don't wind up going on about your views on how likable you are, that won't be an issue. Doing otherwise may at best get you some pity, but it won't lend itself towards getting into a relationship. It could easily end one. Or stop one from developing. (Almost had relationship #2 of my life going, then I got too drunk and got into a bad spot, went a bit nutty, bitched about life and myself, she didn't want to be around me for a couple months after that. Maybe not all women are like this, I can't really say, better safe than sorry...)

3. Don't worry about the car. If someone is that concerned about transportation, then (at least to me) they don't seem like the kind of person I'd want to be involved with. Maybe that's not as important to you, not my place to guess on that.

4. Yeah..."normal" people seem to have no problem getting into relationships, ruining relationships, patching them back up, moving on, starting it all over again. I don't get it at all. I hate having to hear people I know bitching about relationships when they've been in four or five in the course of a couple years, and I had all of one miserable one in my whole life.

Time could be on your side, I said this in another thread, but women (and men, I was corrected on that) in general are more superficial in their early twenties. (I said in general, nobody jump down my throat for that, I said it was a generalization. )

i wouldnt know what to talk about. id only go on about sportcards or my new meteorite that i just bought, this is going to sound wierd but one of my sisters took me on a date to show me how to act with women, yeah it didnt work. im too gruff im very robotic like in public, i didnt give my sister any comments about her hair or clothes and the place of the date was a flipping rock store, a flipping rock store!

uhh can you say nitemare on date street??????

I got nothing for you there. Only couple of dates I've been on, it never really improved for me. We went and got dinner, didn't really talk about anything, just kind of ate, she did most of the talking. I'm clueless on that too. I've had plenty of people tell me what I should do, it just doesn't make any sense. Small talk doesn't make sense to me, so people wind up thinking I just don't give a s**t or I don't want to talk. Well, that's partially true, I don't want to talk about things I consider to be filler if there's nothing worth talking about.

The whole simulated date thing doesn't sound odd. Might have helped me, probably not. Doesn't sound abnormal, at least according to television sitcoms, I think I remember one or two that have portrayed similar situations. Probably some movies too, I just can't think of any.

god should have left us monkeys alone in the cool forest. atleast we wouldnt have to worry about this or our own mortality/

Eh, well, this is one way to look at it, one that I'm not entirely comfortable with, as it treats someone as less than a person, more of an object or a "training lesson," but don't worry about what to do once you are on a date. Just deal with the now. If you make mistakes then (the future,) well, ok, maybe you will figure out something from it and be better off in the future. (future future future...I hate when I repeat words in a sentence.) Never worked for me (at least so far) but I guess it is sort of a more "positive" way to look at it.

i cant be a nice guy. they dont even finish last, i dont where they finish but i dont think they place at all. im going to ask one of my cousins out. think thats wierd? im at the end of my freaking rope man. god life is such a drab! hahaha

first of all my cousin knows me and what im like so i think i have atleast a 75% chance of "yes"

Is there any chance of finding someone in your area who shares your interest in rocks?

I had one boyfriend who was obsessed them as I was and we spent a lot of time camping and looking for agates and polishing them and reading about the best placs to visit to find them and going to rock shows.It really helped to share this interest.Unfortunately...his other interests were pot and video games...I cant do the former and didnt like the later at the time.Though several years later,I got hooked on Silent Hill and Resident Evil games......so,even interests can be added to.

Point being....you love the "out doors" and rocks and might try and find someone else who is into those things.

I never dated a guy who HAD a car until I was in my late 20's,but that is because I am a freak and didnt think it was right to judge someone for not having a car,when I didnt.(You are right,a lot of "nornal girls will expect it).If you find a girl with a car,you can share gas expenses when you go on trips or take the bus,bike or walk.It's easier if you live in a city.

hello. is there a rock club in my area that i can join?
what are you some kindof weenie? hell no there isnt. *click*



girls just dont like me, even nerdy ones. im serious i lived with one of my moms friends and she was quite nerdy, and even she didnt like me. hell librarians dont like me. its terrible! im sure this is going to lead to my death. ittle probably be turned into a novel and then a mini tv series.

yes someone give me a violin because i feel like playing it, argh.

Just give it time and try not to stress over it too much. If you're stressed out, you could be seen as too eager (or so I'm told) which would be counterproductive. Believe me, I understand the feeling of wanting a relationship sooner rather than later, and the whole idea of patience probably sounds irritating at best, but it really could help.

I know the feeling of it being impossible, but, hell, if I managed to get a relationship (albeit a "bad" one) I'm pretty sure anyone can.

It is so damned tough when your obsessions
are just things that most members of the opposite
sex are just uninterested in. I know this as well as
anyone. But, your interests could be expanded a touch
no? I'm thinking that you're interested in more than
just meteorites, but also in geology in general, no?

How about taking a class in the subject, or joining
a rock-hunting club? The latter does exist. Things
like yahoo have special interest groups. While you
might not find an eligible and attractive female directly,
you might through serendipity.

first crush i ever had... 3rd grade @ summer daycare...

we'd go hunting for geos and quartz...

there are definitely girls who are into rocks and such.

yeah i could probably find a club. im just having a real bad day emotionally. i dont know why, maybe i'll just get into bed and take an advil or something hah