Opinions on love

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The popular opinions I see tend to either be overly naive (e.x there's one "special person" you're predestined to fall in love with, like in the movies), or cynical (e.x. love doesn't exist at all except in fiction).

I think both are wrong; I don't think love is "predestined" or that there's only one person you can love, I'd say there's a range of people you could meet that you're potentially comparable with for love.

(Likewise I'd also say that love of life or one's "purpose, mission, calling, etc" is higher than simply love of another person, and unfortunately modern society and media often portrays a "relationship" as one's only meaningful purpose in life, even though this is quite unrealistic).

People who believe in destiny need to be napalmed.

Also, are you asking a question?

Well, I was giving my opinion so you're welcome to share yours.

Well I agree with you on most things. But it's easy to say love isn't important when the majority of people just take relationships for granted. Someone like me, who's completely incompatible with people in general, has a hard time seeing all the happy relationship people out there and not feeling like something's very wrong with me.

To the contrary media portrays ones only purpose in life is to work and acquire tons of material goods. Be a good slave consumer for papa money bags.

I'd rather have a loving gf the all the money and objects in the world.

That's the way I feel, too.

But I would like her to smell like baby powder.

I thought my 1st girlfriend was the one destined to be with me but I quit believing in the idea of one specific persona after her. I believed I could fall in love with most anyone who would be willing to give me a real chance. I loved my 2nd girlfriend too as well as my current & a celeb I had/have a mega huge crush obsession with. I still love em all because I can not unlove anyone.

I f*****g love you man!

I used to be firmly in the 'predestiny' camp in terms of love... then again I was for many of the things in life, almost everything... and don't feel being napalmed for it is appropriate... moving on...

I do still think there is a very, very limited number of 'true love' candidates. There may not be only one, but it may be a dozen in the world or something. People are just so different. And often people want to see compatibility where it is not because of how badly they want SOMEONE... But to find someone who not only connects with you in your commonalities, but who's differences perfectly compliment yours, where you fill in one another's gaps, this is where the true compatibility lies, and by sheer probability, there are so many combinations of thinking patterns, beliefs, interests, preferences, perceptions etc, that the chances of there being more than a few 'compatible' people seems very small to me.

I think the most advisable thing, should you care about such things, is to never take finding such a thing for granted. Because it does exist.

I think most people in this day and age, myself included, share your belief as opposed to the other two.



I don't think media portrays a relationship to be one's only purpose in life. Sure, romantic love is a popular recurring theme, but even before media, it was very important. Romance-related emotions are often quite intense, so naturally they inspire and influence the works of artists in most creative fields.

Our primal instincts are commanding us to find a mate, because that is the only way our genes will survive, and that is the ultimate biological goal. With that in mind, I don't see why it would come as surprise that love is such a pertinent topic

I have no clue anymore.

I try not to think about it for other people - it's incredibly complicated and I hear people, guys and girls alike, talking about divorces they recently had constantly. It's tough enough to conceptualize it for myself, impossible for me to say much accurately for another person.

I like a lot of what Alain De Botton says on the School of Life videos - there's a price to pay for both being in a relationship and being single. If you're particularly weird you're better off either holding out until you meet someone who's compatably weird or avoiding relationships all together or at least keeping to people who can genuinely respect you for who you are and share enough similar life goals.

My own future IMHO is unknowable to me although I'll probably remain single from what I've seen at this point. While I do occasionally meet people where I have a really magnetic connection I meet someone like that maybe once every five hears or so . Going on that quantity and how often they're actually available/single, I can't rule out the possibility but I can't say affirmatively that I'll never win the lottery either.

So what are these other 'purposes in life' after than relationships/family that make it all worthwhile? I hear people say that but can anybody explain it. To work? What? To build model train sets? To be cat person? To the people that say this what are your higher callings?

As for my feelings on romantic love, I don't have many since I haven't experienced it. Predestination has never seem logical, nobody is destined to be with anybody. Just cliched nonsense to make people feel better.

He believes everyone should find a subjective 'higher purpose' and must 'contribute to the world' to feel like they have meaning, whether it be volunteering, having a career, fighting in the military, finding God, etc.

He can't seem to understand some people are wired differently, and that our personal, subjective meaning in life IS to have loving friends, family and a relationship that makes us happy.

His other posts imply to me he requires a woman who is 'intellectual' and 'interesting' and success-driven as he is himself, and doesn't want to believe some people really do desire simplistic, mundane, uninteresting existences so long as they have loving family and friends and a few hobbies and interests to kill time with along the way.

Not everyone wants to be massively successful, influential or meaningful.

Some of us just want to have fun and kill time with some good mates before our time is up.

Personally, I have absolutely no interest in financial, career and educational success.

All I ever want in life is a consistent income that is enough for me to live stably (which i already have, being on disability), one day live on my own instead of at home, find a few nice places to occasionally volunteer at that help me feel comfortable and welcome, overcome my Anxiety and agoraphobia, have loving family, friends and a loving girlfriend, and have the free time to dedicate the rest of my time when I'm not socializing or sorting out my errands to creating my music, my health and fitness, and my other hobbies and interests.

I know people who were miserable, then got a partner, and almost instantly became happy. So yeah, preach all you want about a higher purpose in life, but not everyone is the same.

I'm one of those people

That makes two.

With both of my girlfriends that I dated last year, I felt more happy in the beginning of both relationships than I had all of that year beforehand, even if they were both very brief.