The Most Common Way People Meet Their Partners

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Apparently the most common way people meet their partners is through friends.

Most Common Way People Meet Their Partners

That's probably why many of us struggle with this. Small to non-existent friend networks.

I met my wife through friends.

Many of my girlfriends, though, I met on my own, without the intercession of friends. I met a few of them at work, for example.

I do believe, like you said, that meeting through friends is the most common way people meet future romantic partners, though.

I met my wife through my fiancée. I love to joke about how I ran off with one of the bridesmaids.

Meeting through friends is not that surprising. I'm not so sure that's the main reason we have trouble, though. It seems to me much of it is more anxiety or just not really knowing how to approach moos. I can't fix anxiety, but I can dispense some how-to knowledge on meeting people.

On the psychology side, the more you can focus on small tasks related to socializing and see a difference after following through on a strategy, the more confident you'll feel and the more likely you'll kick fear and anxiety in the face. The whole no friends thing can be overcome.

But, yeah, I've been saying for years to start building a social circle of friends and acquaintances. Your dating pool starts with this circle. Once you've gone out with a few friends, it's wise to begin expanding your dating pool to include whoever you meet. A lot of these will end up in the "friendzone," but you never know who has a sister, cousin, or bff who is single and looking.

But not for too long according to the graph; at least in the research's country of origin. Through friends, family and coworkers are all in decline, in sum all ways through people.

Online and bar are taking over
and in both venues the sex ratio is very imbalanced - I've heard even in bars there are much more males than females.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 07 Mar 2017, 2:05 am, edited 1 time in total.

A friend of mine met his wife through his ex girlfriend, who is her sister.

Before most of the big chain bookstores here closed down, women used to hang out at them. There were always significantly more women in them than men. Coffee shops here seem to have an equal number of men and women, but patrons do not often randomly socialize with other patrons there, even in seating arrangements where they must sit next to each other.

Gotta admit, I'm actually quite surprised at the results. I was under the impression most people met their partners at bars/restaurants/etc. without friendly intervention.

Not so surprised about online being in the Top 3, though.

I've met girls on the subway; I've never met one in a bar.

Ive known this for ages, thats why it pisaes.me off because other methods to did love seem more hopeless by comparison.

What few friebds I do have or make are other males who have no female friends.

Even when I've had female friends they had no one to introduce me too or al their cute friends were unavailable in some way.

It pisses me off even more its how I met both of my girlfriends - through a mutual friend.

F*ckity f*ck f*ck.

I really find that meeting through "mutual friends" usually is best.

Though it's more fun to meet someone on the subway, especially when there's a delay.

Bookstores and coffee shops were never been places to know new people.

Gyms were used to be a good place for meeting new people, .....4-5 years ago; in the recent past, cross-gender socialization in gyms was very common.
But lately things changed completely, I have tried two gyms so far- women on treadmills are on earphones all the times (while most guys don't wear them, it's very noticeable) - I am witnessing only same-sex socialization women socialize within classes were it's almost all female dominated. While men socialize in the weight lifting halls, where it's the opposite.

Bars and the internet will be the only surviving venues for cross-gender socialization.

Sucks for me. My friends are all online or couples, I don't like bars, drinking, casual sex, sleazy people, or drugs, and online dating is highly stressful and very rarely introduces me to similar people.

Maybe someday people will mostly meet each other through hobbies or forums.

I met my gf online. Sure that we go to the same school. But last year she was still in the JR High while I was in the high school. Because in my school 9th grade is still in the JR High building. I met her on her school email in a group chat on Hangouts I was in with people from school. And I saw that her avatar was a pic of a wolf. So I saw that she like wolves a lot just like me. So I started talking to her online. Then we made our own Hangout session with just me and her we talked to for a while till the school block Hangouts during school last year. And we talked though our school emails. But during late year I saw her in person for the first time. Since she was in a class in the High School building. And those times of me seeing her then were quick and pretty awkward. But then this school year came and I saw her everyday. The beginning was still awkward but it's now not anymore. And I see her everyday. And guys sorry if this post is too long.

Don't worry about long posts. I purposefully write excessively long posts just so people like you don't have to worry. You're good.

Most of my friends are couples or single women who don't know any single men, so no chance of me meeting any one through friends, which is what I would have preferred


Any men I've already met through friends years ago when most of them were still single didn't even friend zone me they just blanked me out. I never even managed to make male friends.

I can write a book about about male-female friendships' unwritten rules.

Friendships since childhood aside, most male-female friendships are usually very temporary and within a group setting, it's often a friendship at 'buddies' or 'group outing' friends level but rarely more than that, unless there's sexual attraction.

So you are a part of a social group, and the group happens to have guys, so you become defacto friends with these guys but if they have no sexual attraction toward you, it won't progress to more than "group outing" friends.
The latter type would never initiate messaging with you, they never contact you directly - the only instances they may contact you is when the group is organizing an outing; and this is usually done via on online chat group session.

It is a friendship within a group setting only, and doesn't last a day if such group collapses.

This is btw also true for sexes reversed too.

I know for a fact that the closest female friend I have was initially attracted to me, and she often initiate contact with me.
Former female friends with benefits (with the ones at least ended in good term with) are the other type of female friends who still initiate contact.

So the sexual attraction here seems to be a major component here in ....lasting male-female friendships.

As for the regular female friends (by regular here i mean just friends, no attraction)? They never contact me first, they never call, they never chat me first, they just seem don't care that much to maintain those friendships or to make the friendship-bond stronger with male friends they don't find attractive at all. As long they are in group outings, then it's all good, they fulfill their roles.

A bit of generalization: Regular female friends simply won't pull out their phones, scroll their contact list, and tap on a regular male friend to text him a Hello/Goodmorning/Goodeve without any reason unless they.....are somehow interested in him or at least likes him a lot.

I know for the fact, that many of those don't like my type ie. taller women, into different type of men...etc.

And I think this is universal.