How to go from first date to relationship

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I dated a really nice girl today. She's very pretty. She's 32 but she looks like she's about 25. She has an outgoing personality. She's very energetic and enthusiastic about life. I really like this personality type. I'm not into the reserved personality type so much. Anyway I like her, I reeally like her.

But I have the same problem I have with most of my dates. The first date is always very platonic. I'm ok with that. I expect that. But I never know how to move out of the platonic phase.

The only girls I went further with was one was a little desperate for a boyfriend and one who had her friend trying to set her up with me. So for other girls I don't know how to go from the casual dating phase to the relationship phase. How do I do this?

Also, how do I tell if she likes me? She was really enthusiastic and talkative but I think that might just be due to her personality rather than indicative of whether or not she likes me.

Date 2 must happen next weekend, otherwise nothing will happen.

Don't be too pushy, though. Most girls really don't like pushy guys. And if they do, then they're not for you.

Perhaps the best time to seek to take her hand, is when you're on a scenic overlook. This is especially true if she's into Nature.

Speak about something like "we humans are so insignificant as compared with the expanse of the Universe. Don't you wish we could explore all the distant galaxies?" Not in those exact words, necessarily---but you get the idea.

If she's in any way scientifically inclined, include something like "I wish I could prove the laws of physics as applied at or near Earth to be applicable to a place like the Andromeda Galaxy. Because one never knows how local conditions which we can't anticipate will affect how phenomenal events are manifested."

For the next date, do not take her to dinner and a movie because it would be ironic for both you and your date. Sitting in silence in a movie theater for approximately two hours removes the factor of excitement from the date.

Instead, take her somewhere you know you and your date will both like; such as a museum visit, visiting a zoo, going for a walk in a park, or anything of the sort.

Also, do something physically simple on your own before your date. This may help you avoid situations that any anxieties or stress could cause.

Only take her by the hand if she allows you to take her to a relatively secluded spot.

Or if she takes you by the hand (yes, that could happen).

It's always good to stick to relatively intellectual topics. It's good, too, if she's not into the sort of rhetorical arguments that people on WP like to get into sometimes.

How is this girl culturally? Is she relatively assimilated into Australian culture--or is she more "traditional?" Probably, if she's more the "traditional" type, it's better not to take her by the hand at all until much later in the relationship.

At one time, I wanted to do triathlons---but my knee interfered with that.

I think holding hands is better than pats on the back or caresses on the shoulder. The latter, I believe, should come after holding hands. The latter is definitely more intimate than the hand-holding.

Do you have another date lined up? Perhaps an art museum? Then buy her one of those $5-10 prints in the museum shop--spontaneously. She just might find that cool.

Maybe she expects you to initiate---most women are like that. For "societal" reasons, many women are reluctant to be too "forward" in initiating. It might not be a "bad sign."

The art gallery? That's a good idea

I was struggling to come up with something because I thought my usual plan of going to the zoo, which some girls really like but not do because she's a more sophisticated woman (and a heck of a lot smarter than me).

She said she likes classical music. I know, I'll take her to the symphony!

Now what's a good idea to get her to come to my place? I want her to see how cool my apartment is. I know, when I know her a little better I invite her to dinner on the balcony.

That's really a good idea if you know she's into classical music.

Then find an elegant restaurant which is relatively cheap---but doesn't look cheap. You have to do research for this. Most women don't care if they are greeted by a Maitre d' at the door. They are usually satisfied if the décor is decent.

I once went to a cheap steakhouse which had dramatic Baroque décor---but the meal was under $20 for two (that was in the 80's, though). You'll probably be able to get away with spending under $50 for a meal for two, especially if there's no alcohol.

Chinese/Thai restaurants tend to be relatively cheaper--and have decent décor. Indian restaurants, too. Sometimes, the Indian restaurants also have live drum music.

I would take her to an ethnic restaurant, rather than a chain restaurant. And FORGET about McDonald's!

Indian restaurant? There's one near me that's very elegant. It's done up in elaborate British Raj style.

Another idea is a restaurant near the beach. I love taking girls on walks along the beach or down the jetty. There's a fancy one near the beach but I don't think she likes fancy stuff.

I may try cooking her a meal if I can think of something that's within my cooking ability. Perhaps I could make this.

Time and interaction to get to know each other.

There must be some glorified "clam bar" type places on the beach.

Ask her what she likes to eat.

She might not mind a non-pretentious restaurant with a sea view.

But not a hamburger/hog dog type of place---unless she wants hamburgers or hot dogs.