06 Oct 2018, 2:06 pm
Well, it's been an eventful day today. An ex has 'communicated' (I use that term loosely) with me a week or two ago and it has brought back a flood of emotions including self-hate, envy and a bunch of other things. I was lying on the floor carpet this afternoon in a ball, crying, listening to "I will always love you" by Whitney Houston.
What happens this afternoon? A recent date I've had who I've been talking to online for four years, who I have some significant feelings for, basically said she wanted to be in a relationship with me. Didn't expect this. I'm now 'in a relationship' on fb and everyone is commenting....
What the hell is happening? 
I hate emotions and I don't want to lose this important friend who I've recently become sexual with after meeting in person. But we're in a relationship now. Probably going to be a disaster. 
