Disclosing Low Sociability on Dating Profile

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Hello,,

I'm trying dating sites, I use rsvp.com.au which is Australia only, but I'm sure they're all similar. You can select a "Personality" on your profile, it goes very private, private, sometimes social, social, very social. I'm on the low end of sometimes social, so I can do low doses of low-key parties, I prefer one-on-ones with friends, I don't have a social circle who all know each other, that sort of thing. And I get social exhaustion easily.

Anyway, I did a naughty thing (it's against the TOS of the site) and started looking at statistics on womens' profiles around me in my age range. I used a program to download lots of profiles. What I noticed is that very few (5 out of 400) put private and none put very private.

So what is going on? What's the thing about declaring that you are not that social? I refuse to believe that 99% of people are social. Are they in denial? Or lying? Or is it just culturally OK to mislead on dating sites? My friends advised me not to put private as it declares you as weird, or something like that.

And all the profiles will declare in the text that they have lots of friends and have a wonderful life, which begs the question, if you've got so many people around you, how come you can't get a partner/boyfriend.

I know I'm overthinking this but I see patterns in data and the pattern here is massively skewed and looks so fake. My friend read a book "The Rosie Project" about a scientist who approaches getting a wife like a research project, and she said that it really helped her understand how my mind works. But the data cannot lie.

Dating is a social thing.
Declaring yourself as antisocial is considered unattractive and won't result in you getting dates.
That's why even those who aren't very social aren't going to admit to that on a dating profile.
Dating profiles are meant to attract potential dates, not repel them. Therefore it's unwise to include anything that's considered unattractive, even if it's true.
People omit information or embellish upon the truth in order to attract potential dates, have a conversation, and maybe get a date.
Your friends are correct to advise that "private," will likely be considered weird on that site and not result in contact, communication, or dates.

_________________
No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

If I made a dating profile, I'd just leave it blank, to save everyone the time to read it and myself the time to write it. It's a win-win!

I would be honest in hopes that a women who's similar would appreciate that in me. it seems judgemental for a private women to think negatively because a guy listed private on his profile when the women lied by not listing it.

Interesting. I tried RSVP a while back. I don't remember the option "sometimes social", so it must be a more recent addition. I had selected "private" but would have selected "sometimes social" if it was there. And I wonder if that's part of the reason why hardly anyone (or females at least) select "private" - because it's pretty much the same thing to say "sometimes social". That is, I'm a private person, I'm similar to the way you described yourself. In the right circumstances, I can be social. I daresay the same applies to you. Being "sometimes social" doesn't necessarily mean it doesn't drain you.

So basically what I'm suggesting is that a private person could select "sometimes social" and still be being honest.