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Chris71186
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12 Jun 2018, 11:01 pm

I’ve sort of accepted the fact that I’ll be alone forever.... here’s a long list why

1. I have autism, of course that’s number one..... but it makes the list never the less
2. I’m a unique individual regardless and I’d have a hard time connecting with people regardless if I had autism or not. I just can’t relate to the things that interest most people
3. The third is like it. I am a deep person. I want to talk about hopes, dreams, desires and passions. Most women I met just wanna talk the bachelor. Speaking of passion
4. I’m insanely passionate about everything. This makes women “uncomfortable”. I don’t like skiddish women who are cautious..... I am what I am, and most women are to timid to feel confortable with my level of energy and zeal.
5. I am a good looking guy..... I think. But I have a small gut and I’m not a super model..... this is an unacceptable sin that is unforgivable and offers no redeeming quality.
6. I don’t want kids, which removes 90% of the dating pool. I have autism..... do you really think I have what it takes to be a FATHER? And besides...... I just don’t want to be.
7. I am willing to date LONG distance...... but I can’t find anyone far away who wants the same thing. You know, because they have options.

I could go on...... but this mixed with the fact that I’m 32. Well...... I’d say I better go buy a lottery ticket cause I have a better chance of winning that. Oh yeah that reminds me

9. I’m poor and feminist ideas haven’t evolved enough to make this issue irrelevant



yellowtamarin
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13 Jun 2018, 12:01 am

Sure, you're not a mainstream human so your pool of compatible partners will be smaller than for regular humans. But that doesn't mean there's nobody. I'm quite similar to you, when comparing to your list. So "odds are" there are others.

1. Me too - and I'm happy to date autistic people.
2. Me too - this is the part that really significantly impacts my ability to find a partner (or friends, etc.) - likemindedness. I consider this the only important point on the list, if it was my list.
3. Me too - and it's important my partner enjoys deep conversations. (Though I have also been known to indulge in mindless TV watching, including The Bachelor, but I don't have to talk to my partner about it!)
4. I'm not like this, but I also don't think I'm skittish, cautious, or timid.
5. I don't understand what you are saying here.
6. Me too - no kids for me thanks!
7. Me too - I live in a country town, hundreds of kms away from the capital city. I date people who live in the capital city.
8. There is no 8...
9. Me too - I'm poor, and don't care if my partner is. In fact, I'm more concerned about the power imbalance that can come with dating a rich person.



The Grand Inquisitor
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13 Jun 2018, 12:22 am

Chris71186 wrote:
9. I’m poor and feminist ideas haven’t evolved enough to make this issue irrelevant

What makes you think feminist ideas would ever make this irrelevant? Feminism in its modern incarnation is largely self-serving to women (and perhaps people of colour, etc. I doubt simply being poor will ever make it on the list, especially if you're male and it's due to your own choices). How does it serve women to choose poorer guys to date?



Chris71186
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13 Jun 2018, 12:37 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
Sure, you're not a mainstream human so your pool of compatible partners will be smaller than for regular humans. But that doesn't mean there's nobody. I'm quite similar to you, when comparing to your list. So "odds are" there are others.


Thank you for your kind feedback :) I sure appreciate it.

1. Me too - and I'm happy to date autistic people.
2. Me too - this is the part that really significantly impacts my ability to find a partner (or friends, etc.) - likemindedness. I consider this the only important point on the list, if it was my list.

This is the most important thing for me to. The others I guess are reasons I get rejected per se.


3. Me too - and it's important my partner enjoys deep conversations. (Though I have also been known to indulge in mindless TV watching, including The Bachelor, but I don't have to talk to my partner about it!)

Mindless tv is great lol. I just don’t want to about it for hours cause it’s.... well.... mindless lol.

4. I'm not like this, but I also don't think I'm skittish, cautious, or timid.

I’m an extroverted aspie so often times I’m like a bowling ball falling down the stairs with the best if intentions. Try explaining this to an NT woman though......

5. I don't understand what you are saying here.

I’m decent looking but I’m not a perfect 10. I have flaws...... but people are far to superficial to look past even that.

6. Me too - no kids for me thanks!

Awesome :) there are others out there

7. Me too - I live in a country town, hundreds of kms away from the capital city. I date people who live in the capital city.

To me distance is not nearly a barrier as big as lack of compatibility, interests, life goals, etc. but people want what is easy even if it’s not what’s best.

8. There is no 8...

Oops lol.

9. Me too - I'm poor, and don't care if my partner is. In fact, I'm more concerned about the power imbalance that can come with dating a rich person.

Thank you! Again..... people just seem to want the wrong things.



Chris71186
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13 Jun 2018, 12:40 am

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
Chris71186 wrote:
9. I’m poor and feminist ideas haven’t evolved enough to make this issue irrelevant

What makes you think feminist ideas would ever make this irrelevant? Feminism in its modern incarnation is largely self-serving to women (and perhaps people of colour, etc. I doubt simply being poor will ever make it on the list, especially if you're male and it's due to your own choices). How does it serve women to choose poorer guys to date?


It doesn’t serve women to choose poorer men..... but shouldn’t modern day women be thinking of being self Sufficient? We should be past the idea of men providing for women..... but it’s as you said, modern feminism is a game of cherry picking the parts that serve their interests. But more to the point..... money has no place in the discussion of love. I understand this is “naive” but somethings I think I am happy to remain naive about.



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13 Jun 2018, 1:45 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
Sure, you're not a mainstream human so your pool of compatible partners will be smaller than for regular humans. But that doesn't mean there's nobody. I'm quite similar to you, when comparing to your list. So "odds are" there are others.

1. Me too - and I'm happy to date autistic people.
2. Me too - this is the part that really significantly impacts my ability to find a partner (or friends, etc.) - likemindedness. I consider this the only important point on the list, if it was my list.
3. Me too - and it's important my partner enjoys deep conversations. (Though I have also been known to indulge in mindless TV watching, including The Bachelor, but I don't have to talk to my partner about it!)
4. I'm not like this, but I also don't think I'm skittish, cautious, or timid.
5. I don't understand what you are saying here.
6. Me too - no kids for me thanks!
7. Me too - I live in a country town, hundreds of kms away from the capital city. I date people who live in the capital city.
8. There is no 8...
9. Me too - I'm poor, and don't care if my partner is. In fact, I'm more concerned about the power imbalance that can come with dating a rich person.



You’re a rarity though



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13 Jun 2018, 1:49 am

sly279 wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
Sure, you're not a mainstream human so your pool of compatible partners will be smaller than for regular humans. But that doesn't mean there's nobody. I'm quite similar to you, when comparing to your list. So "odds are" there are others.

1. Me too - and I'm happy to date autistic people.
2. Me too - this is the part that really significantly impacts my ability to find a partner (or friends, etc.) - likemindedness. I consider this the only important point on the list, if it was my list.
3. Me too - and it's important my partner enjoys deep conversations. (Though I have also been known to indulge in mindless TV watching, including The Bachelor, but I don't have to talk to my partner about it!)
4. I'm not like this, but I also don't think I'm skittish, cautious, or timid.
5. I don't understand what you are saying here.
6. Me too - no kids for me thanks!
7. Me too - I live in a country town, hundreds of kms away from the capital city. I date people who live in the capital city.
8. There is no 8...
9. Me too - I'm poor, and don't care if my partner is. In fact, I'm more concerned about the power imbalance that can come with dating a rich person.

You’re a rarity though

I addressed that in the first paragraph. Smaller pool, but not necessarily a completely dry pool.



sly279
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13 Jun 2018, 1:57 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
sly279 wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
Sure, you're not a mainstream human so your pool of compatible partners will be smaller than for regular humans. But that doesn't mean there's nobody. I'm quite similar to you, when comparing to your list. So "odds are" there are others.

1. Me too - and I'm happy to date autistic people.
2. Me too - this is the part that really significantly impacts my ability to find a partner (or friends, etc.) - likemindedness. I consider this the only important point on the list, if it was my list.
3. Me too - and it's important my partner enjoys deep conversations. (Though I have also been known to indulge in mindless TV watching, including The Bachelor, but I don't have to talk to my partner about it!)
4. I'm not like this, but I also don't think I'm skittish, cautious, or timid.
5. I don't understand what you are saying here.
6. Me too - no kids for me thanks!
7. Me too - I live in a country town, hundreds of kms away from the capital city. I date people who live in the capital city.
8. There is no 8...
9. Me too - I'm poor, and don't care if my partner is. In fact, I'm more concerned about the power imbalance that can come with dating a rich person.

You’re a rarity though

I addressed that in the first paragraph. Smaller pool, but not necessarily a completely dry pool.


Most women like you(already the minority) don’t stay single. Ther s loads of poor undateable men whol will die to date them. They bound to find a guy and stick with him, there’s 3,000 is more men in my area then women, good amount of the male population is unemployed or low paid min wage workers. Women like you have tons of choices. I dont know what ops area is like but odds are such women like you have loads of choices just because most women won’t date most men. You’re the only such woman I’ve ever met who is single and you single by choice not from a lack of men who’d date you. If other such women are also single by choice then it’s dooming. How many women willing to date poor men who are single not by choice do you think are out there?
I’m serious cause it doesn’t seem like there any :cry: apparently I’d make a fantastic bf if I was just richer



yellowtamarin
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13 Jun 2018, 2:20 am

sly279 wrote:
Most women like you(already the minority) don’t stay single. Ther s loads of poor undateable men whol will die to date them. They bound to find a guy and stick with him, there’s 3,000 is more men in my area then women, good amount of the male population is unemployed or low paid min wage workers. Women like you have tons of choices. I dont know what ops area is like but odds are such women like you have loads of choices just because most women won’t date most men. You’re the only such woman I’ve ever met who is single and you single by choice not from a lack of men who’d date you. If other such women are also single by choice then it’s dooming. How many women willing to date poor men who are single not by choice do you think are out there?
I’m serious cause it doesn’t seem like there any :cry: apparently I’d make a fantastic bf if I was just richer

I don't understand what you are talking about - who is single by choice? Are you saying I am? I'd date a compatible person in a heartbeat. Read item 2. The pool is small for weirdos like us, but I still don't think it's impossible, not going by the OP's list anyway. He hasn't listed anything that completely rules out any chance of finding someone.



sly279
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13 Jun 2018, 2:55 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
I don't understand what you are talking about - who is single by choice? Are you saying I am? I'd date a compatible person in a heartbeat. Read item 2. The pool is small for weirdos like us, but I still don't think it's impossible, not going by the OP's list anyway. He hasn't listed anything that completely rules out any chance of finding someone.

I don’t see how hard it’d be for you to find s compatibility person, certainly Australia has lots of poor men too. What’s compatible?
Honestly I’d date s incompatible person in heartbeat, maybe it won’t work out but it might and atleast I’d feel loved for a little while. I’d feel like an actual human being for little while. I’m too weird for the Wiredos like you all :(

His list of reasons why he won’t have relationships is more a list of positives why he will.
My list is a death sentence



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13 Jun 2018, 2:56 am

Chris71186 wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
Chris71186 wrote:
9. I’m poor and feminist ideas haven’t evolved enough to make this issue irrelevant

What makes you think feminist ideas would ever make this irrelevant? Feminism in its modern incarnation is largely self-serving to women (and perhaps people of colour, etc. I doubt simply being poor will ever make it on the list, especially if you're male and it's due to your own choices). How does it serve women to choose poorer guys to date?


It doesn’t serve women to choose poorer men..... but shouldn’t modern day women be thinking of being self Sufficient? We should be past the idea of men providing for women..... but it’s as you said, modern feminism is a game of cherry picking the parts that serve their interests. But more to the point..... money has no place in the discussion of love. I understand this is “naive” but somethings I think I am happy to remain naive about.

It's not necessarily about men providing for women. Sometimes it's just about both partners being able to pay their own way to things they may want to do. A financially stable woman probably won't need you to pay her way to an overseas vacation, but if you can't pay your own way it means she's either got to pay for you or go alone. What if she wants to enjoy such vacations with her partner but doesn't want to be stuck paying their way?

Money has some place in the discussion of love due to compatible lifestyles being necessary in order to keep love afloat, as I explained above. Some are content with a modest lifestyle, but often those who can afford more aren't, and having a partner that can't afford to do things with them that they want to do can complicate things.



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13 Jun 2018, 3:35 am

You won't necessarily be forever alone. But there's no denying that your potential dating pool is extremely small due to the factors you listed. I'm similar to you in many ways, and if even I came close to experiencing a relationship once, I have no doubt whatsoever that a woman that appreciates you for who you are and wants to spend the rest of her life with you will eventually come along.


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13 Jun 2018, 3:46 am

OP, you sound like the sort of guy I’d be interested in. Deep, interesting and quirky.

There is less place for guys like you and women like me (At work I feel completely ret*d socially compared to other people there) but we have our place.

I’ve had so much unsatisfying sex and so many abusive relationships, I’m not entering either again until I find someone compatible.

There’s nothing wrong with you. There is just more to you.



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13 Jun 2018, 5:48 am

sly279 wrote:
What’s compatible?

For me, it's item 2 in the OPs list. Likemindedness.



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13 Jun 2018, 6:00 am

I’m a total weirdo. I’m short. I’m sometimes chubby. I didn’t dress too well when I was younger. I’m on the Spectrum. I didn’t have a car till recently. My job didn’t pay well. I’m a social misfit.

Yet I slept with over 30 women, and had quite a few relationships.

I attribute this to saying FU to those who think I’m not viable.



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13 Jun 2018, 6:13 am

Other than autism and being poor none of that sounds like bad stuff.