Online dating messages

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Okay so here is just an idea to ponder, if this applies to you at all.

You struggle with getting dates with women from dating apps/websites. You might get a few messages in with someone but then she just stops responding - no longer interested.

I hear this scenario sometimes on here, and the topic of conversation within the messages is often assumed to be the problem. E.g. "she found out I don't have a job" or "my interests must be too strange for her", etc. etc.

Rather than jumping to conclusions that there's something wrong with you as a person, or your lifestyle, have you considered maybe you just need to proofread your messages before you send them?

Are their embarrassing typos?
Are you using punctuation or does it sound like each sentence is blurted out in a rush with no pauses?
I wonder if you've asked them any questions.

Sure, you might think someone who stops messaging you because of your poor grammar or written conversation style is not worth your time. That's fine. But I'm just putting it out there that your low income or lack of car might not be the issue, even if that's the last thing you mentioned in a message.

Last edited by yellowtamarin on 13 Jun 2018, 3:24 am, edited 1 time in total.

They tell me it’s my job and life status.

As to proof reading, I do I’m terrible at spelling or grammar, still better then a lot of people I’ve met. I’ve been terrible always will be so if it’s super important to a woman then she needs to find grammar Nazi to be with lol I’m just a normal guy.


I found two women who don’t have the list and messaged them I don’t plan for either to go anywhere. They can aim for better quality men. Ones unemployed with anxiety but dreams of having a farm, so probably will want a man with his life together who can provide a farm, not another guy like her

There*
You mean like this?
sentence*

Those three sentences were deliberately written to illustrate each point But I did miss the plural typo! I'll go with that because it's so rushed, there's also too many syllables crammed in there

I read and understood you just fine, so maybe people need to be less uptight about spelling and grammar. Unless their job is writing books, editing books or teaching grammaae and spelling it shouldn’t matter. Especially not for normal conversations.

But you've said that's not the issue for you, that they tell you it's something else, so no need for you to worry about that.

A few slip-ups here and there isn't a big deal, but when people are constantly making simple errors that are so easy not to make, it starts to reflect on them negatively.

Then again, I might be biased. I used to be a Grammar Nazi, that is until we lost Word War II.

Plus, it can make the person difficult to understand. With my extremely literal mind, I have to go to a lot of effort to decipher sentences full of typos, so I can make sense of what they've said. With good spelling and grammar, conversation will flow easier (fewer "I don't understand you"s).


hehehe

Clearly for me and billions others it’s very easy to make simple errors. Man if you all read my friends messages you’d probably kill your selfs. Mean I can’t understand half what he says and have to ask him to make sense if it as it’s so bad grammar.
Most of us are just living our lives without exiling people who make mistakes and rather seeing them as nice people worthy if companionship.
I’m nit writing a book, I can’t afford an editor

Again you’d probably shoot yourselves like the Nazi in this comedy clip if you read my fiends messages or half the comments on Facebook. I put a lot of effort into my posts here only to be insulted and made to feel like s**t did you make this thread to help people or to insulate and mock those who don’t write at a award winning novel writers level(though they have editors and make tons of mistakes) I picture you all sitting in an castl sipping tea, talking about how horrible th common folk are lol joking aside normally your nice and helpful but this does seem mocking and mean to me

No, never.

I've actually had people tell me that it's really weird that I always type with proper grammar, even in chat rooms. Of course, today, everyone types on phones, where they automatically capitalize and spell-check for you (whether it's the correct word or not).

I never find out why I was ghosted...that's why it's called ghosting

I'm pretty convinced that I'm just cursed, or that I've died without knowing it, and this is Hell. It would make a lot of sense. I am not being ghosted, I am the ghost

Sly, I think I stated fairly clearly in my OP what I created the thread for. Same as most of my threads - to offer potential new insight to those for whom it may be relevant. You've indicated it's not relevant to you, so this thread is not for you. I'm certainly not trying to mock anyone. Just throwing ideas out there for people to ponder if they want to. That's it.

People here won’t ever admit that it’s them with the problem, you’re wasting your time.

All my interactive problems have one common denominator: me.

You seem cool. I wouldn’t take rejection on dating sites personally. It’s not realistic.

So you live on your own planet alone?
Nope so actions and thoughts of others effect you as your actions and thoughts effect them
It’s like the worlds eco system everyone’s connected. You can’t determine your own future. Others effect you whether you like or not or know it or not.
Some guy being like ugh she’s ugly or too fate isn’t your fault or doing. Likewise if you get passed over for promotion cause the boss is having sex with another coworker who he promotes Instead isn’t your fault or doing.
If I wake up later then normal that effects my family’s schedule. We are all interconnected to some extent.

I like you but we’ll never agree on your conservative ideas

Thanks, I think you're cool too.

Most "rejection" I don't take personally. When I send messages and never get replies, I just shrug it off. What bothers me is when I've been chatting with someone for a while, and it seems like we get along well...and then one day, seemingly out of nowhere, there's just no more replies, and I'm left there wondering what I must have said to scare them off.

Heck, I have Real Life friends who won't reply to me online anymore =|