HistoryGal wrote:
You really think NT chicks are out gaming autistic guys? No. They are out with other NTs.
Regarding the NT chicks who would cheat, I would say both cases being true at the same time is a possibility.
Peacesells wrote:
HistoryGal wrote:
It's amazing how you justify being a$$holes. You really think it's morally ok to dna test a kid? Try being careful who you go to bed with.
You really think NT chicks are out gaming autistic guys? No. They are out with other NTs.
You don't trust her? Don't use your phallus on her.
You talking to me?
It seems like she must genuinely hate men on the autism spectrum or else at least feel bitter towards them. I am curious if it is simple bitterness or genuine dehumanization. For me by obsessing on the psychology behind things, this ceases to have any meaning so long as there is a continued absence of compelling supportive reasoning.
I have explained very clearly that Aspergers means deficits of social function aka a disability that impairs my ability to accurately judge others, know when I am being lied to, etc. I don't know what else to say and I feel doubtful that it's even possible to get across to others who blindly hate.
Why should I not take precautions against being taken advantage of? Not doing so would in terms of a financial analogy be akin to openly sharing my Social Security Number. I
shouldn't expect people that I
trust to steal my identity but why should I leave the door wide open for it to happen?
We caution young children against trusting strangers, how is this any different?
NorthWind wrote:
SSJ4_PrestonGarvey wrote:
It should be obvious because having ASD at least to the extent that I do means an obviously & severely flawed ability to assess the trustworthiness of others, that others are extremely likely to become aware of in a very short period of time. No one would fault a 5 year old for doubting a stranger offering candy. The kind of social deficits in play mean there's no one easier to lie to. It is a part of my disability and if I were NT I likely wouldn't consider it. It's a just a matter of life that I have to operate solely on facts and write off my intuition as basically beer goggles coupled with severe myopia. Although no one hates those that have to wear glasses due to poor eyesight.
I wouldn't care why someone distrusts me, unless it was my fault. The fact remains that he distrusts me and a relationship full of distrust is worthless to me. It also confirms my assumption that surveillance and distrust wouldn't start or end with the paternity test. Your reason to distrust can be applied to every situation, not just to paternity.
What if it is due to social deficits on his part, due to being on the spectrum? No definitive statement being made about you, just acknowledgement that I have a severely reduced capacity to assess the trustworthiness of others and an awareness that others most likely full well know about it, according to some articles actually being permanently at an NT child's level of social development.
It's not "
I know you're a cheater"
It's "
I inherently lack an adequate ability to assess your trustworthiness with any degree of accuracy and this deficit is likely known to others so I need ways to mitigate this situation lest every individual out there who takes advantage of others will come and target me"
Most people will not cheat on others. But those who have psychopathy or sociopathy take considerable pleasure in doing so and do not experience guilt. Those who have toxic shame wish to inflict amplified versions of their worst life experiences onto others, basically they had something in their past that shattered their core identity. For such individuals the goal is to create an emotional fallout for another person that destroys their core identity to a worse extent than what happened to them.
Although for me I would simply require time before advancement in a relationship to the extent of beginning a family. For someone specifically setting out to ruin some guy's life, this time frame is likely to be too long. I am not even set on having kids at any point, only if the conditions someday become right.
rdos wrote:
I think this is one of the primary reasons why NDs shouldn't get NT partners. You never know if they are honest or not, and even if they started out as honest they may change and take advantage of you later, and you basically would have no idea about it.
It's an intriguing quandary to be sure. Unless I were to instead have an extremely mild to non existent case of Aspergers, it is true that an NT can mislead me in a perfectly undetectable way from my point of view. In terms of purely social cues would have to rely entirely on others such as friends/family to inform me of anything or else perhaps observing noticable changes in behaviour.
For me I would be a very boring person to try to play toxic mind games with.
_________________
My account is often forced to do Captchas so I may be slow to reply or perhaps even unable to reply.
06 Jul 2018, 4:51 pm
