Dating site sutible for aspies?

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NoMercy
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13 May 2019, 4:57 pm

Tried posting on here for companion, but I think the post was removed? I don't know I didn't get an email saying post removed, but I don't see it in my history.. unless I'm doing something wrong..

So yea.. Looking for a dating site that is suitable for aspies (I'm in UK btw... but topic for all). Prefer to get aquainted first, by emails/chat... Any progression may not conform to the usual NT expectations, given issues with social situations, " wining and dining " wouldn't work for me..

I think I'd probably get on best with another aspie maybe... although previous GF was NT

Since one cannot post directly on here (correct me if I'm wrong!) does anyone know of a dating/relationship site per my description?

TIA

nick007
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13 May 2019, 6:42 pm

I used some sites specially for Aspies & some sites for people with other various disorders that can include Aspergers. Some sites were scams like having tons of women in rural towns which of corse were bots. Some sites had major bugs. & the rest had very few members, especially women. From what I've seen on this forum there's a lot more Aspie men looking for Aspie women than Aspie women looking for Aspie men. One reason is Aspergers is diagnosed 4x more in men than women. Also Aspergers is sometimes thought of as an extreme male-brain so it's easier for Aspie women to relate to NT guys than for Aspie guys to relate to NT women. It tends to be much easier for Aspie women to get dates with NT guys than for Aspie guys to get dates with NT women cuz of the way the dating roles are.

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breaks0
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14 May 2019, 12:33 am

Mercy: I'm sorry I can't help you w/your own country. I just don't know.

But for people in the States, this is one: https://uneepi.com/

The founder of that site came and spoke to my Aspie support group a couple months ago and he said the site has somewhere around 2K unique users across the country. The man to woman ratio is about 2: 1 and there are at least 100 LGBTQ people on it.

nick007
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14 May 2019, 8:26 am

breaks0 wrote:

The man to woman ratio is about 2: 1

There was a site that was created by a member on this forum & they were at least 10x more men than women. Normal dating sites don't even have the men & women ratio as even as 2; 1 so I'd hihgly suspect someone is exaggerating or just plain lying to you.

sly279
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14 May 2019, 11:59 am

breaks0 wrote:

They charge money and price similar to eharmony and some bigger paid sites, I think it’s be better off going to to the bigger sites .bnever understand the greed. Surely for 1-2 dollars a month they’d make loads of money. And that’s be a lot more reasonable for most people.

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AquaineBay
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14 May 2019, 3:21 pm

Personally I don't think there are many dating sites that would work for aspies(If any really). They're usually based on pictures and profiles. Most aspies have trouble with body language and posture so most of the time you will look weird in your pictures, second profiles are like sales pitch you see on commercials take them with a grain of salt cause that person could be fudging the truth like crazy(another problem because aspies tend to be too trusting.)

I think going on forums and other sites similar are better cause you get a better idea how a person interacts with people. There are just too many things dating sites don't tell you about another person and when you meet people with the intention of dating then of course they're going to put their best foot forward and minimize all the negative traits.

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breaks0
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14 May 2019, 9:14 pm

Re: uneepi. I did know they charge, though he claimed their rate is relatively low. And otherwise you're right, I was just reporting what he told our group. I've never used a dating website, so the info isn't based on the experience of anyone I know.

The Grand Inquisitor
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14 May 2019, 9:29 pm

I think your post was likely removed because this is not meant to be used as a dating site. This section of the forum is meant for discussing issues and topics pertinent to love and dating.

I don't know any aspie dating sites, but even if there was one, I doubt there'd be many women on there. ASD diagnoses are 4:1 men to women, so there's already more men, and dating sites are already majority men, so you'd be likely to find lots more men than women on an aspie dating site. And since it's easier for women to get attention on regular dating sites it's less likely that women than men would be interested in joining an aspie-specific dating site.

sly279
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14 May 2019, 9:54 pm

AquaineBay wrote:

People on forums aren’t looking to date though

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sly279
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14 May 2019, 9:57 pm

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:

I think your post was likely removed because this is not meant to be used as a dating site. This section of the forum is meant for discussing issues and topics pertinent to love and dating.

I don't know any aspie dating sites, but even if there was one, I doubt there'd be many women on there. ASD diagnoses are 4:1 men to women, so there's already more men, and dating sites are already majority men, so you'd be likely to find lots more men than women on an aspie dating site. And since it's easier for women to get attention on regular dating siteso it's less likely that women than men would be interested in joining an aspie-specific dating site.

Also most aspie women don’t want to date aspie men so that ratio gets even worse, then you need to take into account distince and so the ratio and odds gets even worse, then common interests, ratio gets worse then attractive both ways , seeking to date aspie women is doomed to failure

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The Grand Inquisitor
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15 May 2019, 1:25 am

sly279 wrote:

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:

I think your post was likely removed because this is not meant to be used as a dating site. This section of the forum is meant for discussing issues and topics pertinent to love and dating.

I don't know any aspie dating sites, but even if there was one, I doubt there'd be many women on there. ASD diagnoses are 4:1 men to women, so there's already more men, and dating sites are already majority men, so you'd be likely to find lots more men than women on an aspie dating site. And since it's easier for women to get attention on regular dating siteso it's less likely that women than men would be interested in joining an aspie-specific dating site.

I agree with all that except the first part. I've seen no evidence to suggest that most aspie women don't want to date aspie men. There are some that don't, but I don't believe it would even be half.

I'd also add to the list the disproportionate amount of LGBT people on the spectrum, and the higher amount of asexuality as barriers too.

sly279
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15 May 2019, 2:13 am

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:

sly279 wrote:

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:

I think your post was likely removed because this is not meant to be used as a dating site. This section of the forum is meant for discussing issues and topics pertinent to love and dating.

I don't know any aspie dating sites, but even if there was one, I doubt there'd be many women on there. ASD diagnoses are 4:1 men to women, so there's already more men, and dating sites are already majority men, so you'd be likely to find lots more men than women on an aspie dating site. And since it's easier for women to get attention on regular dating siteso it's less likely that women than men would be interested in joining an aspie-specific dating site.

Quite a few on wp have expressed such. I take them at their word unless you have mind reading powers to tell us they lied?
And a lot want the same well off men as nt women which most aspie men don’t meet.
Men such as me don’t meet those requirements and it would seem a lot of aspie men don’t either, as we struggle with finding work and usually work min wage jobs if we do find any . Hardly a middle class man with his life together.

Mean how many women aspie or not do you think desire a man who’s defective and can only get min wage or less? I don’t think there’s even any disabled fetish women. You’ve pointed out to me before that I’ll never find a woman who’d date me. It won’t be any different for most other aspie men in same situation.

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The Grand Inquisitor
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15 May 2019, 2:53 am

sly279 wrote:

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:

sly279 wrote:

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:

I think your post was likely removed because this is not meant to be used as a dating site. This section of the forum is meant for discussing issues and topics pertinent to love and dating.

I don't know any aspie dating sites, but even if there was one, I doubt there'd be many women on there. ASD diagnoses are 4:1 men to women, so there's already more men, and dating sites are already majority men, so you'd be likely to find lots more men than women on an aspie dating site. And since it's easier for women to get attention on regular dating siteso it's less likely that women than men would be interested in joining an aspie-specific dating site.

I know that there are some aspie women who wouldn't date aspie guys. I'm just not convinced it's most.

There is larger numbers of unemployment and underemployment with aspie but I don't think it would be fair to say that it is characteristic of aspie. Many aspies have decent jobs and stable incomes.

And I never said that you will never find someone. I can't possibly know that. What I said was that your odds are considerably bad relative to those with full-time jobs, their own places and who are not overweight. If you are willing to date women that most other men are not willing to date then it's possible you could find someone.

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