I’m finally going to meet him in person, this time it’s for real, he already got his plane tickets. We are meeting next month, I’m kinda freaking out, I’m now very nervous & worried, what if it’s different when we face to face, what if I run out of things to talk about, he may not like me if there are alot of awkward silence. I can worry toooo much, I really want our relationship to work. He is the Best thing that happened to me since I lost my mom over 6 years ago, when I lost her, I got very scared, I felt soooo alone, my mom was already there for me, she was the only one that understood me, she the only one that accepted me for having Aspergers, she explain things better than me, she was my safety net, she was best & she hung out with me when I was lonely & didn’t have friends, we went shopping, we went to the mall, to the movies, we went out to lunch. I wanted to die when I lost her, it took me over 5 years to get better, I thought I wasn’t going to be the same person. When I broke my ankle last year, I was grieving still, but I got better, in the hospital, I wanted to die, the nurses were friendly & so nice to me,I got little better. Then I went to the healthcare center for physical therapy, I didn’t want to do my physical therapy, I was depressed, my PT cheered me up. I had to fight to walk again & I did, the healthcare center changed me, I got mental sooooo better. Then in January of this year, I met a man on a dating app. He is soooooo understanding & patience, he is perfect for me, he understands me when I skip a word or two, it feels like we sorta met already. How can he understand sooo much? He is a NT. I don’t want to screw it up. I already had anxiety this morning.
01 Dec 2019, 8:33 pm
