Being Friends w/your Ex-boyfriend

Post Reply New Topic

Has anyone stayed friends with their ex? I think it might be weird to stay friends with my ex-boyfriend when I get a new boyfriend. This never happened to me before.

i've been friends with my ex for a year now.


all i know for certain is that her family likes me and we needed the time apart between our breakup and our chance encounter on a downtown intersection near our favorite art supply store.

everything else is currently impenetrably nebulous

she'll ignore my messages for two weeks and then make me dinner and watch movies.

i don't know what she wants from me. it's odd.

be careful, it doesn't seem like it has been long at all since you split.

Play it by ear if it doesn't cause problem with you and a new B/F then it is fine. If it starts causing drama then you will have to make a choice. When I was dating my wife I keep my female friends once I got married I drifted away from them as I felt like it was the right thing to do.

He broke off with you just before Christmas didn’t he? Usually it’s considered quite rude to break off with someone just before a special occasion such as Christmas, Valentines Day, or your birthday. I might continue to talk with him now and again, but not to really be friends.

He broke up with me few days before Christmas, I didn’t know it was very rude. My first ex-boyfriend was very rude, he did not spend my birthday with me, he spent it with his friends, we broke up the next day. I don’t talk to my current ex everyday anymore.

Had plenty of exes in my time...none of them wanted anything to do with me (got ghosted)

weird thing was after marriage a couple of them tried to renew a friendship (maybe they missed me and thought it would be safe?) I got DM'd on my facebook page and one found my work email and emailed me.

One wrote me a really long email explaining how bad she felt because she thought I was too intense (which I probably was) but how over time and her life being single she regretted letting me go and how if she could turn back time....blah blah...

I showed the email to my wife but she just shrugged her shoulders.

But getting back to the topic - it's quite rare unless you and your ex are part of a larger friendship group. Then again it also depends on the nature of the split. Your exes left in acrimonious circumstances so can understand not wanting to see them again. But other couples split because of long distance issues, or some other intractable problem.

My wife used to have a friend who made an arrangement for her ex to live/rent in her new husband's house so he could assist with childcare for their biological child. Husband number 2 was happy for his stepdaughter to have her biological dad in her life, actually all parties were very happy with the arrangement. They even go out together.

I've never remained friends with any of my ex girlfriends or ex wife. That being said, I probably would have remained friends with a few of my ex girlfriends; I can think of two that I probably could have remained friends with. I was the one who broke up with them. In both cases they reached out to me after our break up to "catch up" and presumably to remain friends. I declined in both instances, not because I didn't want to be friends with them, but out of deference to my wife.

I know people who are friends with exes and it works out just fine.

Also, the older I get the more I can understand how people who divorce in their 50s, 60s or older often can stay friends.

Being friends with an ex can be very complicated but it can work for some. It’s tough when either person still has feelings for the other. I’ve experienced that from both sides.

Sometimes it’s necessary to cut all ties; sometimes it’s not.

We both don’t have feelings for each other, we still care about each other.