Relationships and age perception

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I thought I'd start a new thread because we were starting to derail another one.

I think that those of you who are older and who have been in relationships can't understand what it's like to be in your 30s and to have never had a relationship.

We feel old because we've got this weird disconnect. We're too old to begin. We're not old in the stream of time. We're old in the context of relationships.

Who is going to want to have a relationship with an inexperienced adult of their own age unless they are also inexperienced? Finding some one else in that category id really difficult.

We are at teenager level of dating, although we are heading for our 40s.

I hope you find someone soon.

I know it’s definitely frustrating that you haven’t had a relationship yet. It’s partly, I feel, because you haven’t met the “right” person and won’t “settle.”

It has nothing to do with your “suitability.”

I was about 36 when I started dating. I am now in my 40's. I have hardly any experience. It can be scary thinking about it...

my personal strategy was to feign experience, even though I had none....

I understand this isn't for everyone, but I spent a lot of time and effort cataloging and honing what worked and what didn't.

I even kept spreadsheets. I am damned weird

And anyway, if we act like teenagers, who's to say that's wrong?

No spreadsheets for me. I go by instinct.

I'm not using teenager to mean that we are all childish. I've always been way too serious, even as a teenager.

I mean that if I, in my 30s got into a relationship, I have no previous experience to drawn on, other than family and friendships I guess.

I'm mature enough generally for someone my own age, but may do things unexpectedly in a relationship context due to no experience.

In my opinion, dating experience is overrated. What does it matter that one has the knowledge that person X has previously reacted to Y in a certain way when person B can have a completely different reaction? Whether you have experience or not, you're still going to have to get to know each person as an individual.