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Kitty4670
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04 Aug 2020, 7:10 pm

I was talking to a guy that I met yesterday, he asked what work I do, I told him I don’t work, I also said I’m disabled & have more problems. He couldn’t handle it, he left the chat room. I hate telling men that I’m disabled, have Aspergers, Psoriasis & have Dyslexia, I always got worried when I tell them.



ReapTheWhirlwind
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04 Aug 2020, 10:27 pm

What do you mean by disabled? Are you handicapped?


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INTJ185
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07 Aug 2020, 2:12 pm

It's not that you mentioned those things but that you did so before you established a basis for sharing that information (otherwise, they wouldn't have left like that).

It's okay to not mention things until it's obvious they have earned the right to know *and* it makes a difference in where the relationship can go. That means waiting to tell them until not knowing will cause them to make plans with you that you can't participate in.

Also, rather than telling them everything about yourself, after a week or so start asking them what they think about dating someone who has some challenges.



Kitty4670
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07 Aug 2020, 11:53 pm

INTJ185 wrote:
It's not that you mentioned those things but that you did so before you established a basis for sharing that information (otherwise, they wouldn't have left like that).

It's okay to not mention things until it's obvious they have earned the right to know *and* it makes a difference in where the relationship can go. That means waiting to tell them until not knowing will cause them to make plans with you that you can't participate in.

Also, rather than telling them everything about yourself, after a week or so start asking them what they think about dating someone who has some challenges.

I told him too soon? He asked what I do for work, I have to be honest with him. I should have just tell him I’m not working, but he going asked why. I usually wait to tell guys about my Aspergers, Cerebral Pasly & other stuff, I don’t want to scared them away, I ended up scaring this guy anyway.