I Have Just Discovered Why I Can't Ask Girls Out.

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All my life I have struggled with this one. Only now I know why. Mindblank! Asking a lady out is a very direct thing to do and I can't do that because if I am nurvous than I am at high risk of getting mindblank anyway, and add to this that it is a direct question to ask...
So when I try to ask direct questions I hit the mindblank wall. So I will automatically have to quickly talk about something completely different and unrelated to "Switch" my mind back on.

It is the reason why I was never able to ask a lady out in a direct real life one to one way! It is only now I have realized this! I always knew I had difficulty... That I had a problem with this... But I never knew exactly why!

Well, I guess that knowing why a thing is happening is halfway to knowing what to do to remedy things.

Wow!! !...Identifying the problem is close to solving it...What could you do to prevent mind-block from happening next time you are determined to ask a lady out???...Perhaps you should research this...I don't know why a form of martial arts that i tried briefly came to mind... TAI CHI...Is good for your health, because it teaches you to breath properly and helps to control your anxiety through meditation...Check-out some you-tube videos...Greetings from California...Please stay safe...

OP, I will tell you a secret....

Directly “guy asking out woman” like in the movies rarely happens; usually it is not how it happens.

In 90% of cases, the woman chases the man and makes it bloody obvious she’s interested to the point it makes your move super easy.
The hard part is to gain and maintain that interest.

That is an issue I have had because I find it hard to tell if a lady is attracted to me or iff she is just being nice. I have made mistakes in this in the past and ended up being close to getting myself into trouble, as in the past, as I was not able to ask ladies out verbally, I would write a note. Ladies tend not to take kindly to notes if they happen to be married. (How can I know if they are with someone or not?)

In my lifetime I have asked about 15 girls out? (A lot if one considers I am in the latter half of my 40's!)
During my life I have either dated two or four ladies depending how one looks at it. If one looks at it from online and text messaging and not regularly meeting physically to kiss and cuddle then I have dated four, and if one looks at it from the point of view of actually meeting them in a dating situation where we kissed and cuddled, then there have been two, and in both these cases, they asked me out and the first who I nearly married, had to convince me that I was dateable material because I had convinced myself I was not due to past failed attempts.

I will say that the four ladies I have dated all were lovely people.

I think you may not quite understand mindblank. While when I get nurvous I am more suseptable to getting mindblank situations, if I try to talk directly I will likely get mindblank regardless of being nurvous or not.

It is a bit like someone who has a stutter in that when they are nurvous they may stutter more, but they will stutter anyway even if they are calm.

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You are right in that i misunderstood, because i misread and because i do not understand what that feels like...Once, not long ago, my beloved (Aspie) husband said that his mind was "blank"...He seemed to be suffering...I wonder if this is what you experience???...Regardless of the fact that i misunderstood, please do look into Tai Chi...It may help health-wise in everyway...

I have a neighbour who does it. I do not want to do it because of the spiritual aspect of it.

I used to really suck at asking girls out.

Know the feeling well.....just couldn’t get out the words.

Intense feelings... Hard to express.

Read this please if you haven't already:
http://dev.wrongplanet.net/forums/viewt ... p?t=387442

Yes. I have read.

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Interesting...I tried it just a couple of times...And i didn't know that there is a spiritual aspect to it...

The only time a woman did that with me, it turned out she was a covert narcissist who was specifically searching for someone emotionally vulnerable who, she could easily manipulate and abuse.

^ And that’s exactly our problem.

Our problem is that we lack attractiveness, not that we don’t know how to ask out.

Perhaps some Aspie guys miss what would be otherwise obvious signs and never realize she's begging to be asked out. But on the whole, you're correct, lack of attractiveness.