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Clueless2017
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20 Jan 2021, 11:37 pm

What the OP is describing in this thread is INFATUATION...Infatuation focuses on the feelings--how the object of our obsession made us feel...In the moment, we really believed he or she to be our soul-mate--the one we could not live without...Some youngsters, NTs inclusive, attempt suicide when this special bond breaks...

When the infatuation phase ends (it must end, because it is hormonal), the two involved must be mature enough to transform the relationship into something more solid, something more lasting...Hopefully, a relationship based on common interests and beautiful qualities, like love and mutual respect...

Sadly, many times, due to the lack of maturity of those involved and other factors, the relationship ends...And our heart is broken in pieces...The good news being that God created the human heart with the capacity to heal completely emotionally...And as we mature, we are better able to choose a life-time partner...This time around, we will again experience the excitement of the special bond but without the blindness of our first love... :wink:



Rexi
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21 Jan 2021, 2:06 pm

Pepe wrote:
Dr_Manhattan wrote:
It's hard for me to imagine a time more beautiful than when I thought I had found the girl with whom I'd grow old. Of course, that's what I thought. But, as time goes on, the painful realization that love is infinitely more complicated than a teenager with raging hormones could've ever comprehended before turning 18 years old sets in. Humans are naturally self interested and have their own agendas. When you're in high school, you're still trying to find out who you are and, more importantly, who you want to be. When you're at the height of this dopamine high, it can be devastating to bring everything between you and your love interest to an abrupt, screeching halt. It's tragically anticlimactic. All that affection, time spent together, and planning for an imagined future together...gone. At least, this was the case for me. Some dumb kid who thought it would work like the movies and you'd live happily ever after. But my ex seemed more interested in getting as much attention as she could get via various means. She even showed up at school and proudly displayed wounds she had given herself. When confronted about it, she just shrugged it off as "how she was". Needless to say I was mortified. I went to school everyday, worried that one day I'd walk in and learn that whatever pain she'd tried to convince everyone she had overwhelmed her and she took her own life. It's possible she really was in distress, but the fact that she thought it was cute and/or funny to show self-harm marks was the nail in the coffin. I was so disillusioned, looking back on those times. This was the girl I thought I'd marry one day. Regardless of the bad, what good I saw from her was so beautiful I thought it would be the undoing of my very existence. The purity she emanated in those solitary moments was so great I felt unworthy of being in her presence. What I mean to say is that what I desire is the feeling I felt in those moments. Like the world ceased its movement in time and space. There was no one else, and there was no time. Just us. But what's most difficult for these kinds of things is letting go. Accepting the reality that nothing like that will happen again with the same person. Lightning never strikes the same place twice (it's an expression, I know lightning can strike the same place twice). She moved on and, from what I can tell, is married now. The difficulty of letting go is fear of not having anything like that again.


I, like many others, have discovered we are put onto this earth to be disappointed.
Be assured, you are definitely not the only one. 8)

Disappoint me more, bby :heart:


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Pepe
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22 Jan 2021, 6:46 am

Rexi wrote:
Pepe wrote:
Dr_Manhattan wrote:
It's hard for me to imagine a time more beautiful than when I thought I had found the girl with whom I'd grow old. Of course, that's what I thought. But, as time goes on, the painful realization that love is infinitely more complicated than a teenager with raging hormones could've ever comprehended before turning 18 years old sets in. Humans are naturally self interested and have their own agendas. When you're in high school, you're still trying to find out who you are and, more importantly, who you want to be. When you're at the height of this dopamine high, it can be devastating to bring everything between you and your love interest to an abrupt, screeching halt. It's tragically anticlimactic. All that affection, time spent together, and planning for an imagined future together...gone. At least, this was the case for me. Some dumb kid who thought it would work like the movies and you'd live happily ever after. But my ex seemed more interested in getting as much attention as she could get via various means. She even showed up at school and proudly displayed wounds she had given herself. When confronted about it, she just shrugged it off as "how she was". Needless to say I was mortified. I went to school everyday, worried that one day I'd walk in and learn that whatever pain she'd tried to convince everyone she had overwhelmed her and she took her own life. It's possible she really was in distress, but the fact that she thought it was cute and/or funny to show self-harm marks was the nail in the coffin. I was so disillusioned, looking back on those times. This was the girl I thought I'd marry one day. Regardless of the bad, what good I saw from her was so beautiful I thought it would be the undoing of my very existence. The purity she emanated in those solitary moments was so great I felt unworthy of being in her presence. What I mean to say is that what I desire is the feeling I felt in those moments. Like the world ceased its movement in time and space. There was no one else, and there was no time. Just us. But what's most difficult for these kinds of things is letting go. Accepting the reality that nothing like that will happen again with the same person. Lightning never strikes the same place twice (it's an expression, I know lightning can strike the same place twice). She moved on and, from what I can tell, is married now. The difficulty of letting go is fear of not having anything like that again.


I, like many others, have discovered we are put onto this earth to be disappointed.
Be assured, you are definitely not the only one. 8)

Disappoint me more, bby :heart:


I promise I will do my best, but will still disappoint, no matter what I do, so it is a pretty safe bet I will. 8O
Such is my life. :mrgreen:



Rexi
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22 Jan 2021, 1:54 pm

Pepe wrote:
Rexi wrote:
Pepe wrote:
Dr_Manhattan wrote:
It's hard for me to imagine a time more beautiful than when I thought I had found the girl with whom I'd grow old. Of course, that's what I thought. But, as time goes on, the painful realization that love is infinitely more complicated than a teenager with raging hormones could've ever comprehended before turning 18 years old sets in. Humans are naturally self interested and have their own agendas. When you're in high school, you're still trying to find out who you are and, more importantly, who you want to be. When you're at the height of this dopamine high, it can be devastating to bring everything between you and your love interest to an abrupt, screeching halt. It's tragically anticlimactic. All that affection, time spent together, and planning for an imagined future together...gone. At least, this was the case for me. Some dumb kid who thought it would work like the movies and you'd live happily ever after. But my ex seemed more interested in getting as much attention as she could get via various means. She even showed up at school and proudly displayed wounds she had given herself. When confronted about it, she just shrugged it off as "how she was". Needless to say I was mortified. I went to school everyday, worried that one day I'd walk in and learn that whatever pain she'd tried to convince everyone she had overwhelmed her and she took her own life. It's possible she really was in distress, but the fact that she thought it was cute and/or funny to show self-harm marks was the nail in the coffin. I was so disillusioned, looking back on those times. This was the girl I thought I'd marry one day. Regardless of the bad, what good I saw from her was so beautiful I thought it would be the undoing of my very existence. The purity she emanated in those solitary moments was so great I felt unworthy of being in her presence. What I mean to say is that what I desire is the feeling I felt in those moments. Like the world ceased its movement in time and space. There was no one else, and there was no time. Just us. But what's most difficult for these kinds of things is letting go. Accepting the reality that nothing like that will happen again with the same person. Lightning never strikes the same place twice (it's an expression, I know lightning can strike the same place twice). She moved on and, from what I can tell, is married now. The difficulty of letting go is fear of not having anything like that again.


I, like many others, have discovered we are put onto this earth to be disappointed.
Be assured, you are definitely not the only one. 8)

Disappoint me more, bby :heart:


I promise I will do my best, but will still disappoint, no matter what I do, so it is a pretty safe bet I will. 8O
Such is my life. :mrgreen:

I promise to do my best to punish you properly


_________________
My Pepe Le Skunk. I have so much faith in our love for one another. Thanks for being an amazing partner. :heart: x :heart:

Any topic, PM me; mind my profile.