Is it pointless to have sex just to say ''you've done it'' ?

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Pepe
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14 Nov 2022, 3:19 am

IsabellaLinton wrote:
There's nothing wrong with wanting an experience for the sake of sensation and experience, or to be able to say you've done it. That's the basis of true Romanticism. Think of all the things you've done and tried in your life to satiate curiosity or to feel like you're part of the crowd: the books you've read -- just to say you had, the places you went in order to say "I've been there!", and the foods you've tried just because they piqued your interest. It's normal to want sensation and experience so long as it's done in a safe and healthy way. My advice is to go for it, assuming of course the other person consents and you use protection.


I have always been in favour of "Information Gathering". :twisted:


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kraftiekortie
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14 Nov 2022, 7:30 am

Casual sex without personal regard, from personal experience, hurts a lot of people.



blitzkrieg
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14 Nov 2022, 10:48 am

Considering that there is a social stigma of sorts attached to being a virgin in this day & age - for some people, it makes more sense to seek out a sexual experience, even for the sake of it, for social status & sometimes to satisfy curiosity.



goldfish21
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14 Nov 2022, 10:50 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Casual sex without personal regard, from personal experience, hurts a lot of people.

If it hurts, you’re doing it wrong. Use lube.


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kraftiekortie
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14 Nov 2022, 11:08 am

It's still pointless to have sex just for the sake of some "status."



goldfish21
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14 Nov 2022, 1:09 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
It's still pointless to have sex just for the sake of some "status."


Not if some “status,” has a point to you.

I find it slightly annoying how many people posting in this thread are projecting what’s personally a good choice for themselves onto all others as if their personal criteria for making such a decision should apply to everyone else.

It’s kind of like some overly exuberant religious fanatic trying to sell an atheist, or member of a different religion, on their belief system being The One and Only belief system. Umm, sure buddy, you do you - and let others do their own thing.


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kraftiekortie
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14 Nov 2022, 1:25 pm

Hey....don't you tell me off! :P

I don't have a "moral stake" in this.

I'm not trying to run peoples' lives. I'm just offering my opinion---like you are offering your opinion.

All I'm saying is that "virginity" is something which is a priority among many people, and the lack of loss of it makes people depressed.

I've seen people post here that they want to end their life because they've never lost their virginity. It's a tragedy because "sex is not life," nor does being a virgin or not being a virgin determine one's worth.



goldfish21
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14 Nov 2022, 1:32 pm

^except that is not the neutral stance of your posts. Your posts in this thread are full of personal bias and not necessarily applicable to everyone else.

I haven’t said anything about being for or against sex for the sake of sex, only that it’s a very personal decision and people need to decide for themselves what’s right for them whereas you seem to be shaming the idea as a bad decision unless there’s some deep emotional connection. That may be true for you, but I think it’s.. not good to suggest that ought to be others’ truth.


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kraftiekortie
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14 Nov 2022, 1:44 pm

Actually NOT.

If you would read my posts carefully, you would notice that I advocate for an emotional connection, and that my experience with casual sex hasn't been a good one. I even said it was based upon "my experience"

No sirree.....I've known many people who have had much casual sex. And I have nothing against it per se in a moral sense. I used to do it myself, so if I would make a moral judgement, it would be against myself.

I read "The Happy Hooker" when I was a teenager---and I really enjoyed it. I liked the character Xaviera Hollander.

I've been friends with strippers in the past.



IsabellaLinton
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14 Nov 2022, 1:47 pm

Personally, I never understood equating sex and morality or romance.
Sure the two can be wonderful together, but they don't have to be.
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

:twisted:



kraftiekortie
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14 Nov 2022, 1:57 pm

Right. It is. Freud was right.

But, in my mind, there's a connection. Can't help it. I'm not "superior" because of it. In fact, in some ways, I'm not as "good" as some people who indulge in casual sex.

I tried to have sex with no emotional component. Something (nothing) came up! :P



IsabellaLinton
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14 Nov 2022, 2:04 pm

I've never had casual sex in my life.
Some people have had hundreds of partners.
I can't believe they had an emotional connection with all those people.

I've only had two consensual partners.
To me the important factor is consent, not necessarily romance.
It's pretty rare to get both at once, especially for the first time.



goldfish21
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14 Nov 2022, 2:48 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Casual sex without personal regard, from personal experience, hurts a lot of people.


kraftiekortie wrote:
It's still pointless to have sex just for the sake of some "status."


Quoted, unedited. You’re making blanket statements & judgements that don’t necessarily apply to other people, their own beliefs, morals, ethics, or circumstances.


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blitzkrieg
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14 Nov 2022, 3:02 pm

I think kraftiekortie has good intentions, goldfish, regardless of whether he is right or wrong in this thread (I tend to disagree that sex needs to have an emotional component, personally).



Pepe
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14 Nov 2022, 5:28 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Casual sex without personal regard, from personal experience, hurts a lot of people.


Not if it is mutual.


_________________
Laughter is the best medicine. Age-appropriate behaviour is an arbitrary NT social construct.
Don't tell me white lies. Gaslight me at your peril. Don't give me your bad attitude. Hypnosis, psychosis. Tomarto, tomayto. There are *4* lights. Honey badger.
If I'm so bad, pass me by. ;)


And one more thing,



Also, as George Carlin said, "I have no stake in the outcome." I'll stick around for the comedy.

"A stranger is a friend gang-stalker you haven't met yet."
Truth may be inconvenient but it is never politically incorrect...The Oracle of Truth has spoken...8)
Glory to Ukraine.


Pepe
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14 Nov 2022, 5:32 pm

blitzkrieg wrote:
Considering that there is a social stigma of sorts attached to being a virgin in this day & age - for some people,


There will always be unenlightened ppl in the world.
You can't let troglodytes govern your life.

blitzkrieg wrote:
it makes more sense to seek out a sexual experience, even for the sake of it, for social status & sometimes to satisfy curiosity.


As I said, I don't let ignoramus's direct my actions. 8)


_________________
Laughter is the best medicine. Age-appropriate behaviour is an arbitrary NT social construct.
Don't tell me white lies. Gaslight me at your peril. Don't give me your bad attitude. Hypnosis, psychosis. Tomarto, tomayto. There are *4* lights. Honey badger.
If I'm so bad, pass me by. ;)


And one more thing,



Also, as George Carlin said, "I have no stake in the outcome." I'll stick around for the comedy.

"A stranger is a friend gang-stalker you haven't met yet."
Truth may be inconvenient but it is never politically incorrect...The Oracle of Truth has spoken...8)
Glory to Ukraine.