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Autism - "different" or "inferior" WRT relationships?

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Nades
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18 Feb 2023, 12:45 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Nades wrote:
Twilightprincess wrote:
Different does not mean inferior.


To be diagnosed with autism, a psychologist needs to compare the social and communication skills of the person being assessed to that of the general public. If the psychologist notices they're not as good as the general public to an extent that they're a hindrance, that person gets a diagnosis for autism.

That, in a nutshell is what autism is. It means communication and social skills are inferior to the general public.

You're practically trying to deny autism even exists.


You're suggesting that neurotypical communication is better, just because it's more "typical".
I don't see it as better.

One distinguishing feature is that NTs are able to lie, where we are not (or we have difficulty).
NTs are known for saying one thing, but meaning another.
They don't mean what they say.
They are better at masking their intention, meaning they can deceive and mislead people.
They interpret other people's facial expressions to mean things they likely don't mean.
Nearly all narcissists and sociopaths / psychopaths are NT.

You're forgetting that Autistic people are loyal, honest, and focussed on details.
We are poets and writers and dreamers because of our sensory awareness.
We are hard working and tend to get highly-skilled jobs.
We usually have more empathy than the average bear.
We like being alone with one or two people instead of big parties.
That makes Autistics prime dating material, imo.

We can be just as good looking or sexual as anyone else, if that matters too.


God.........Cornflake where are you.



TwilightPrincess
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18 Feb 2023, 12:46 pm

I never said that autism doesn’t exist…anywhere.


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Nades
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18 Feb 2023, 12:48 pm

Twilightprincess wrote:
I never said that autism doesn’t exist…anywhere.


You said it everywhere. You're one of the first to jump down peoples throats here when people say that autism is a developmental disorder that hampers social and communication skills. (Which is what autism is)



klanka
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18 Feb 2023, 12:49 pm

Quote:
like being alone with one or two people instead of big parties.
That makes Autistics prime dating material, imo

I think that would make a woman prime dating material.

Considering the hundreds of 'i can't get a date' threads I'd say it's a disability or disorder.



Last edited by klanka on 18 Feb 2023, 12:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Nades
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18 Feb 2023, 12:50 pm

klanka wrote:
Quote:
like being alone with one or two people instead of big parties.
That makes Autistics prime dating material, imo

I think that would make a woman prime dating material.

Considering the hundreds of 'i can't get a date' threads I'd say it's a disability or disorder.



Forget trying to reason with them. They just refuse to acknowledge what autism is.



IsabellaLinton
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18 Feb 2023, 12:53 pm

Nades wrote:
It's underdevelopment of social and communication skills. Not a "difference".

I honestly need to ask Cornflake to sticky the DSM diagnostic manual criteria for autism here. The lack of understanding and intentional ignorance here about what autism entails is getting appalling. It makes any meaningful discussion here almost impossible.


We know what the criteria for autism are.
Yes the word "deficit" is used.
Frankly, I'm proud to be deficient in most of the NT behaviours / abilities.

Also, this is TGI's thread about feeling insecure.
He's expressed thoughts of self-harm because of his autism.

Please don't spam or troll his thread by insulting neurodivergent people.
It makes it seem like you have no empathy.
Autistic people do.


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TwilightPrincess
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18 Feb 2023, 12:54 pm

I stated that having autism does not make one “inferior” as you claimed.

You said: “Bring inferior doesn’t mean unable” and “a developmental disorder puts people at a disadvantage and makes them inferior when it comes to most things social in nature.”


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Last edited by TwilightPrincess on 18 Feb 2023, 12:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.

TwilightPrincess
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18 Feb 2023, 12:55 pm

On a support site for people with autism, the word “inferior” should NEVER be used to refer to people with autism.


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Nades
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18 Feb 2023, 12:57 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Nades wrote:
It's underdevelopment of social and communication skills. Not a "difference".

I honestly need to ask Cornflake to sticky the DSM diagnostic manual criteria for autism here. The lack of understanding and intentional ignorance here about what autism entails is getting appalling. It makes any meaningful discussion here almost impossible.


We know what the criteria for autism are.
Yes the word "deficit" is used.
Frankly, I'm proud to be deficient in most of the NT behaviours / abilities.

Also, this is TGI's thread about feeling insecure.
He's expressed thoughts of self-harm because of his autism.

Please don't spam or troll his thread by insulting neurodivergent people.
It makes it seem like you have no empathy.
Autistic people do.



Honestly, the only trolls here are the ones who keep saying that autism doesn't involve poor development of social skills and communication problems. It's not insulting autistics by admitting that.....it's what autism is.



klanka
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18 Feb 2023, 12:58 pm

Yeah the truth about autism is sugar coated in the famous books and tv shows.

Quote:
We are hard working and tend to get highly-skilled jobs

I'm easily capable of working in a highly skilled field but the interview process requires soft-skills that I don't possess.
so I can't get the job.

But that's another topic really.

Inferior may sound harsh but my social skills are clearly inferior to most.



Nades
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18 Feb 2023, 1:00 pm

Twilightprincess wrote:
I stated that having autism does not make one “inferior” as you claimed.

You said: “Bring inferior doesn’t mean unable” and “a developmental disorder puts people at a disadvantage and makes them inferior when it comes to most things social in nature.”


I wasn't the first person to mention being inferior, that was me quoting another poster. Also, it's being inferior on the social development and communication side anyway.

I think "inferior" is a lot better than "different" anyway when it comes to autistics social skills.



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18 Feb 2023, 1:01 pm

Let’s not also forget that Autism is a spectrum, some severe autism cases can’t even talk and lack self awareness of danger. That’s certainly not just “difference”. Down Syndrome for instance is not simply difference either, there’s the word « syndrome » for a reason.

Imagine classic autism as a kitkat; then melt it in an Olympic pool you get high functioning AS.
There’s a world of difference between the two extreme ends.



Nades
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18 Feb 2023, 1:03 pm

klanka wrote:
Yeah the truth about autism is sugar coated in the famous books and tv shows.

Quote:
We are hard working and tend to get highly-skilled jobs

I'm easily capable of working in a highly skilled field but the interview process requires soft-skills that I don't possess.
so I can't get the job.

But that's another topic really.

Inferior may sound harsh but my social skills are clearly inferior to most.


My social skills are also inferior too. I was diagnosed as autistic in 2012 when they took great care in assessing my ability to communicate and how my social skills where. The physiologist said they were underdeveloped and not as good as NT's.

I never thought of it as a "difference". I thought of it as underdevelopment because it is.



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18 Feb 2023, 1:05 pm

My social skills are different, not inferior. I wouldn’t change me if I could. I’m already Practically Perfect in Every Way. I even have a magic umbrella.


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18 Feb 2023, 1:08 pm

Twilightprincess wrote:
I stated that having autism does not make one “inferior” as you claimed.

You said: “Bring inferior doesn’t mean unable” and “a developmental disorder puts people at a disadvantage and makes them inferior when it comes to most things social in nature.”



I am 5’3, I am naturally innately inferior for basketball, sure some 5’3s could become great basketball players with skill and super heroic effort. Einstein was innately intellectually superior, he was probably inferior in other areas.

The use of the word « inferior » should not be politically incorrect, it is truth, we are all innately inferior or superior in this and that area.
You are just nitpicking words and choosing to be offended and stiring up fights…. over semantics.



IsabellaLinton
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18 Feb 2023, 1:11 pm

klanka wrote:
Yeah the truth about autism is sugar coated in the famous books and tv shows.

Quote:
We are hard working and tend to get highly-skilled jobs

I'm easily capable of working in a highly skilled field but the interview process requires soft-skills that I don't possess.
so I can't get the job.

But that's another topic really.

Inferior may sound harsh but my social skills are clearly inferior to most.



If your social skills are "inferior" it's because you can't lie, or answer interview questions with BS like NTs do.
You can't make the correct / fake facial expressions on cue.
You aren't an actor or a trained monkey, saying what the people want to hear.
Chances are you're honest and straight-forward.
You say what you mean, and mean what you say.

This makes many NTs uncomfortable, because they don't want to be called out.
That's why they label and marginalise us as disabled.
They know we'll see through their BS.

They invent these diagnostic categories to make it seem like we're the problem.
If they call us "disabled" it makes it sound like they're right, and we're wrong.
It helps boost their ego.
They're the ones with pathological problems like lying and deception, or being fake.

Bad interviewing doesn't mean you wouldn't be a hard-working, dependable employee in the right job.

I wouldn't want to be hired or considered "normal" using any set of NT standards.

If we only focus on so-called defecits, we're ignoring the strengths inherent to autism.


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