I hate seeing young couples (rant)

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TwilightPrincess
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28 Sep 2023, 7:13 pm

I like seeing young couples who are happily in love. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside like warm apple crisp fresh from the oven.

I only had a small, fleeting experience with young love, but I'm happy to see others happy.

Now I want apple crisp.


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IsabellaLinton
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28 Sep 2023, 7:36 pm

Just a reminder my comments were not even about American police. I am not American and nor do I live in USA. I am free to have whatever experiences and opinions I have about my own country and the way my autistic / disabled kids, or myself as an autistic physically disabled woman, have have been treated by law enforcement in our many encounters both good and bad.


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28 Sep 2023, 8:13 pm

TheUndiagnosed wrote:
I wish I never created this thread, I regret this rant so much now, wish it could be deleted



If it makes you feel seriously embarrassed you can ask for it to be closed or moved to a private area. There is nothing wrong with writing how you feel. As an alexithymic I admire you because you are able to understand what you feel. I'm sorry, this situation bothers you beyond that of the thread.<>About me, I don't feel happiness, a feeling that I don't understand. I hate it, I envy it. Everyone has their own life, their own comforts and discomforts. They're just other people different from me. I'll give you an example extremely different from what you write, but which has an important side to it. A football coach was called to take a team he coached 30 years ago, from the lower series to the major series, therefore from B to series A. He he motivated his group of players and they won. And they returned to Serie A. His name is Claudio Ranieri. And he also coached in England. He didn't understand why instead of being happy with their promotion to the top flight, both they and the fans were making fun of their opponents. He ran towards them and told them to think about what they had achieved and they all went to apologize to their opponents and the public. The point is to think about what we can do about ourselves and not what others do. We can improve ourselves and very often we think about things that are collateral to us. They concern the lives of other people. Doing so generates a wrong way of thinking. You have suffered so far. but it is not said that you have to suffer forever. It can depend on many variables including randomness. I understand that the situation makes you feel sadness. Depression. Stress, anxiety, sense of not being able to do like others. You try to put yourself in the best conditions because a change happens in you. In psychology they would advise you to abandon those mental patterns. And think differently than you do. Try to change this mental attitude of yours and think about the fact that the happiness that you can perceive is also possible for you. You have 43 years and you still have many chances. These will also depend on your mental approach. If you focus your attention on people about whom you essentially know nothing, you will only see their external aspects. Maybe their realities are not even what they appear to be at first glance. : maybe they aren't even happy. Or they have gone through hardships different from yours and still struggled to achieve those goals. And they deserve that happiness. The meaning of the matter is to focus attention on yourself. Because by doing differently you divert it onto something else and distract you from your goals and successes. You wrote about bullying: same thing as you. So I understand. But my mind thinks assertively, this allows me to be able to see the beautiful part of myself. Not just the difficult things that I have overcome or that I have to overcome. I know it's difficult, but if you intensely want to succeed in something that is important to us, you need to change your mental settings. Sorry, I'm writing this because you, like me and like everyone else, deserve a life that has value at least equal to how much beauty there is in us. You demonstrate that you are capable of looking inside yourself. For me this is beauty, with time this inner beauty will correspond to increasingly better situations. In psychology it has been proven that positive thinking creates situations beautiful in the future. So one piece of advice is to think positive words and to think of yourself, because you are the most important person and the others are just the scenario, that is, the other person who surrounds you, but is completely collateral to you. The central point is what you can achieve, with the same effort, dedication and stubbornness with which you arrived at those 43 years. Think that from now on your difficult life will improve, step by step. And this will happen. Because you deserve it just as all sensitive people deserve it, and here in the forum I perceive many of them.


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SkinnyElephant
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28 Sep 2023, 8:15 pm

It's one thing to discuss whether people on the spectrum are aware they've done anything wrong when they exhibit behavior that could be viewed as creepy.

As for discussions of whether police are good or bad, that's one topic the mod specifically said they don't want us discussing.



bee33
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28 Sep 2023, 8:22 pm

TwilightPrincess wrote:

I never said that it had to be my way or the highway.

You didn't say it but that is how you act. You cannot tolerate others not capitulating to your view or expressing views of their own and you get very dogged about it. Not because of the view itself but it seems because they are daring to disagree with you.

TwilightPrincess wrote:
You seem to have a problem with my personal position/stance. I have listened although no one is obligated to read or respond to every post (or any post) on WP. I think it bothers you that my stance won't change. Once again, it's okay for people to have different opinions.
I do not care at all about your stance. I care that your attitude is entitled and supercilious and that anyone who dares present an opposing viewpoint is condescended to and not tolerated by you. This is a problem.

Incidentally, since this started I received a PM from a poster I don't know saying that you and Isabella did the same to them.



bee33
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28 Sep 2023, 8:23 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Just a reminder my comments were not even about American police. I am not American and nor do I live in USA. I am free to have whatever experiences and opinions I have about my own country and the way my autistic / disabled kids, or myself as an autistic physically disabled woman, have have been treated by law enforcement in our many encounters both good and bad.
I don't care at all about your views on police. I care about the way you treat people who disagree with you. I won't repeat what I just wrote to the other one of your duo. It applies to you too. Except that you also offered up a personal attack and she did not.



TwilightPrincess
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28 Sep 2023, 8:29 pm

bee33 wrote:
TwilightPrincess wrote:

I never said that it had to be my way or the highway.

You didn't say it but that is how you act. You cannot tolerate others not capitulating to your view or expressing views of their own and you get very dogged about it. Not because of the view itself but it seems because they are daring to disagree with you.

TwilightPrincess wrote:
You seem to have a problem with my personal position/stance. I have listened although no one is obligated to read or respond to every post (or any post) on WP. I think it bothers you that my stance won't change. Once again, it's okay for people to have different opinions.
I do not care at all about your stance. I care that your attitude is entitled and supercilious and that anyone who dares present an opposing viewpoint is condescended to and not tolerated by you. This is a problem.

Incidentally, since this started I received a PM from a poster I don't know saying that you and Isabella did the same to them.

If people have concerns about posters' behavior, they should be talking to the mods about it rather than slander people behind their back.

Once again, I've stated my opinion. I didn't say that you couldn't have an opposing viewpoint. We are each entitled to our own stance/perspective.

Please stop trolling.


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IsabellaLinton
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28 Sep 2023, 8:30 pm

bee33 wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
Just a reminder my comments were not even about American police. I am not American and nor do I live in USA. I am free to have whatever experiences and opinions I have about my own country and the way my autistic / disabled kids, or myself as an autistic physically disabled woman, have have been treated by law enforcement in our many encounters both good and bad.
I don't care at all about your views on police. I care about the way you treat people who disagree with you. I won't repeat what I just wrote to the other one of your duo. It applies to you too. Except that you also offered up a personal attack and she did not.


My duo? Do you mean my boyfriend?
Who is my duo and what was the personal attack?
Actually, don't write it here. Please report it.


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bee33
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28 Sep 2023, 8:52 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
bee33 wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
Just a reminder my comments were not even about American police. I am not American and nor do I live in USA. I am free to have whatever experiences and opinions I have about my own country and the way my autistic / disabled kids, or myself as an autistic physically disabled woman, have have been treated by law enforcement in our many encounters both good and bad.
I don't care at all about your views on police. I care about the way you treat people who disagree with you. I won't repeat what I just wrote to the other one of your duo. It applies to you too. Except that you also offered up a personal attack and she did not.


My duo? Do you mean my boyfriend?
Who is my duo and what was the personal attack?
Actually, don't write it here. Please report it.

I already reported it. Obviously your duo is you and Twilight Princess. You are the ones who gang up on people. I really don't want to discuss it anymore. I think you are being intentionally disingenuous.



bee33
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28 Sep 2023, 8:53 pm

TwilightPrincess wrote:
Please stop trolling.
Now you've crossed a line. Accusing me of trolling is NOT okay.



IsabellaLinton
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28 Sep 2023, 9:01 pm

How did we gang up exactly, when we don't even live in the same country, and we don't have the same experiences or same opinions?

I'm totally at a loss why you would think we are ganged up just because we both replied with our individual opinions. I started by pointing out several things I did NOT like about police, which included being profiled just like you stated in your post. If anything, I was agreeing with you by saying that I'd had a rough time with police judging me as an autistic woman, and not handling my autistic kids' needs very well either. I thought that was the same point you were making, rather than being a duo with Twilight? I concluded my comment by saying that despite the hardships I had enumerated, I still had faith in the police in the country where I live, which is my opinion.

I have no idea how that's construed as ganging up on you or even disagreeing with you. I did not make personal attacks because I was not warned of any, or told by mods that I'd attacked anyone. I'm free to get upset or frustrated when you say that I'm a bad person, that I've ganged up on you, or that you're angry with me, especially when I've done nothing wrong. Now you are stating that I'm disingenuous because I asked a sincere question, wanting to know what the heck you're on about. I have no idea what this duo is. Twilight and I live in two different countries and have two different opinions about police. The fact that I lost my dad and I'm grieving doesn't seem relevant to you, but it's relevant to me and I made that very clear in my answers to you. I thought you understood grief and loss, but I guess not.

I don't want to discuss it either, except that I don't appreciate being called disingenuous when I've not used a single negative word against you or even your beliefs.


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IsabellaLinton
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28 Sep 2023, 9:05 pm

bee33 wrote:
TwilightPrincess wrote:
Please stop trolling.
Now you've crossed a line. Accusing me of trolling is NOT okay.



But you can accuse me of being disingenuous, and being in a duo, or being an awful person?

Huh?


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IsabellaLinton
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28 Sep 2023, 9:06 pm

SkinnyElephant wrote:
It's one thing to discuss whether people on the spectrum are aware they've done anything wrong when they exhibit behavior that could be viewed as creepy.

As for discussions of whether police are good or bad, that's one topic the mod specifically said they don't want us discussing.


THANK YOU


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IsabellaLinton
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28 Sep 2023, 9:10 pm

bee33 wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
Just a reminder my comments were not even about American police. I am not American and nor do I live in USA. I am free to have whatever experiences and opinions I have about my own country and the way my autistic / disabled kids, or myself as an autistic physically disabled woman, have have been treated by law enforcement in our many encounters both good and bad.
I don't care at all about your views on police. I care about the way you treat people who disagree with you. I won't repeat what I just wrote to the other one of your duo. It applies to you too. Except that you also offered up a personal attack and she did not.


I was at dinner with my partner when I wrote that. Twilight had nothing to do with what I wrote. My response was because I happened to scroll down to see what happened after magz asked that the conversation stop being about police. I saw a comment where you said you were angry with me and I was awful. Why, I had no idea. Hence, my "WTF" comment. That's not a personal attack. It was a sincere question, meaning "WTF is going on here?" My partner read it too, and he was confused who the duo was. It's not like I preplan my comments with some woman from another country before defending myself from internet attacks. I respond accordingly.


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WantToHaveALife
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28 Sep 2023, 10:01 pm

SkinnyElephant wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
I don’t think one gets a criminal record if they're not convicted of an actual crime. If it's determined that the guy wasn't aware what he was doing was wrong, I highly doubt he'd end up with a criminal record, unless perhaps he did something extremely invasive, in which case society needs to intervene and ensure that those behaviours stop.

I think it's generally reasonable to expect victims of behaviours of the socially naive to tell their unwitting perpetrators to stop doing what they're doing before resorting to law enforcement. If the guy refuses to stop, then he needs to be stopped, and subsequently educated on why what he's doing is wrong.


The one time a woman threatened to press charges, here's how it went down: I really wanted to know what I did to make her lose interest in me (and I wouldn't let the topic go). I wasn't aware I was "harassing" her. I simply viewed myself as a guy who really wanted to know what he did to make her lose interest, so I'd know how to alter my behavior with women I pursue in the future.

After some back and forth, she said "Just stop texting me already." I replied along the lines of "Just tell me what I did to make you lose interest. Then I promise you'll never hear from me again." She then replied telling me to seriously stop or else she'll press charges.

So I stopped (only because I didn't want charges). I then exercised a revenge strategy I outlined on a prior post (and made sure to pick a strategy where she'd have no 100% evidence I did it).

Had she simply told me what I did to make her lose interest, the revenge strategy never would have happened.


ya thats another example or just on how it has long made me angry and pissed off, and likely always will, on how people and society expect us guys, men, to have common sense, innate common sense for knowing how to notice a womans subtle signs of non-interest, and what is creepy and what is not creepy around women.

as for what one of the users said:

"There are definitely people with learning difficulties who don't understand boundaries and who are not necessarily creeps or stalkers, but may come off as such because of a lack of social awareness, or experience in certain situations, for example, when dating."

Reminds me, i have heard for years now, some people say, even people who are life coaches, they say they find it too bad, and tragic, sad, unfortuneate, that social skills, or just people skills, how to relate and connect with others, conversation ability, is not a school subject taught in school in our formative years like Algebra and History, Math are.

Its a sarcastic mindset, but if that ever became part of the education curriculum in the future, i feel it should be mandatory for guys, men, but optional for women, because women can get away with not understanding social boundaries since they are never expected to pursue or make advances on a guy they like, and lets say if they did, womens social awkwardness or social ineptness, will never be dismissed as creepy or dangerous, threatening, like it is on mens end.

Goes back to what i said, should be obvious unfortuneately as to why guys, men, are the only gender that get thrown those labels, because men are on average physically bigger and stronger than women, that means, in a womans perspective, men can be perceived or interpreted, viewed, as a danger or a threat.

Ya that one guy with autism i'm in contact with, he told me as a baby he was born premature, quite early premature, however, i do know its possible for people to be born with autism and they were NOT born premature.

It won't surprise me at all if him being born premature has also contributed to him being clumsy socially, or just sucking socially, due to the restraining order incident he got sadly, i can't help but feel very sorry for him, unsurprisingly, and to no shock, he has still never had a girlfriend, never had his first kiss yet either.

I always get angry and mad whenever people and society still think that men have it better than women do.



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29 Sep 2023, 12:29 am

 ! magz wrote:
The thread had it chance and it derailed again.
Really, if you want to discuss experiences with the police and with the people the police should protect you from, go to a more appropriate place and do it in more appropriate ways.

Taking into account that the thread was abandoned by the OP on the second page, I believe it can no longer serve its purpose.
Locked permanently.


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