‘Love on the Spectrum’ Netflix show

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TheSpectrum
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29 Jul 2020, 4:48 am

Hi everyone,

Been a while since I’ve visited. Might have missed an existing thread about this programme but I haven’t seen any discussion about it in L&D which is a surprise!

Have you been watching this? I think it’s fairly balanced covering people with different circumstances from one another, on varying parts of the Autism Spectrum.

There are some things I can relate to from before when I had difficulties with Social interactions and dating, and some lessons covered which would have been good to know in the past.

Anyways this thread is intending to be more of an open discussion about the show.
Personal Thoughts?
Favourite people?
What could be done better?
Is it fair in its representation?

:D


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Amity
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29 Jul 2020, 5:49 am

Long time indeed, havnt watched the show, but wanted to say hello :D
Is it available online?


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SportsGamer35728
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29 Jul 2020, 6:44 am

I love it!!



MaxE
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29 Jul 2020, 6:50 am

I saw this on YouTube last year and had issues with it.

OTOH they show these two people who became a couple because the young woman saw the young man at some sort of autism-related venue, thought him hot, and told him so. In short order they are sharing a house.

Everything else has to do with some "dating expert" who arranges dates between autistic people. At the risk of offending anyone, this lady's "clients" seem much more profoundly autistic compared to the first couple I mentioned i.e. they don't seem able to live independently and support themselves financially without a fair amount of support from family and professionals.

So the dating expert basically arranges dates between male and female clients that seem to me the equivalent of a job interview, usually it seems it's the guy who has to impress the young woman as a potential suitor. All with cameras rolling BTW although "reality TV" tries to make you forget that aspect.

Sorry if this is a spoiler, but for those hoping for a different outcome, absolutely none of these arranged "dates" results in anybody becoming a couple. All the male suitors are rejected by the females sooner or later. In particular, we are never given any indication that any of the young women is the least bit randy. Many will disagree, but this show seems to lean heavily on the concept that dating should not be about sex even though the exact opposite is true IRL.

Given that all these people at least seem to believe they want to be in relationships, I rather wish they could create a sequel in which a different "expert" tries to help them achieve that objective by some means other than the sweaty-palm, televised "dates" relied upon by the expert in this program.


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Temeraire
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29 Jul 2020, 7:07 am

Thanks for the tip off.

I shall watch some of this later.

Nice to see you here again.



TheSpectrum
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29 Jul 2020, 9:34 am

MaxE - have to agree with the whole “interview” take on the dates. The people being filmed may have initially agreed to it all but when it actually happens and the cameras are everywhere in the restaurant it’s not always going to be the scenario they prepared for.

The girl in the first episode who went for a date was an example of that - she was extremely anxious to the point of shutting down. While it was likely her date played a hand in this, the cameras probably didn’t help either.

And yes the people getting dating advice from the experts were notably more affected by their autism but if they weren’t their need or willingness to attend would be different I’d imagine.

Also thanks for making me aware it was already on YouTube. Didn’t know that! I wonder if they recut it at all. It’s only recently gotten syndication on Netflix. Apologies, it may have already been covered last year in the forum.

Temeraire and Amity - Hello, thank you, good to be back! :D

SportsGamer - My gf and I are enjoying it a lot.


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SportsGamer35728
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29 Jul 2020, 10:01 am

My only complaint is the lack of high functioning Aspies like myself who can pass for NT in certain circumstances.



The_Face_of_Boo
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29 Jul 2020, 3:09 pm

MaxE wrote:
I saw this on YouTube last year and had issues with it.

OTOH they show these two people who became a couple because the young woman saw the young man at some sort of autism-related venue, thought him hot, and told him so. In short order they are sharing a house.

Everything else has to do with some "dating expert" who arranges dates between autistic people. At the risk of offending anyone, this lady's "clients" seem much more profoundly autistic compared to the first couple I mentioned i.e. they don't seem able to live independently and support themselves financially without a fair amount of support from family and professionals.

So the dating expert basically arranges dates between male and female clients that seem to me the equivalent of a job interview, usually it seems it's the guy who has to impress the young woman as a potential suitor. All with cameras rolling BTW although "reality TV" tries to make you forget that aspect.

Sorry if this is a spoiler, but for those hoping for a different outcome, absolutely none of these arranged "dates" results in anybody becoming a couple. All the male suitors are rejected by the females sooner or later. In particular, we are never given any indication that any of the young women is the least bit randy. Many will disagree, but this show seems to lean heavily on the concept that dating should not be about sex even though the exact opposite is true IRL.

Given that all these people at least seem to believe they want to be in relationships, I rather wish they could create a sequel in which a different "expert" tries to help them achieve that objective by some means other than the sweaty-palm, televised "dates" relied upon by the expert in this program.



The females probably have some options outside the TV program; so why would they pick any autistic.

These autistic males most likely have zero options elsewhere, they must be very desperate to subject themselves to a such aired humiliation.



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07 Aug 2020, 3:59 pm

I saw the first three of five episodes available on Netflix before losing interest.

Our local disability support provider would have these "contestants" participate in group activities and "dating preparation" workshops before expecting one-on-one dates to be warranted. If the prospective daters met during these workshops, instead of the speed dating the show uses, they probably wouldn't be so apprehensive about dating and they'd better know what the other person needs to feel comfortable.

I think the show is counting on there being difficulties; difficulties that could have been better mitigated. For that reason I couldn't watch more, it seemed a bit exploitive and could give others the impression these contestants are the highest functioning autism gets.

The show wouldn't be so "entertaining" if the contestants were all university graduates.



xxZeromancerlovexx
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08 Aug 2020, 2:13 pm

SportsGamer35728 wrote:
My only complaint is the lack of high functioning Aspies like myself who can pass for NT in certain circumstances.


What do you mean? I’ve only seen a teensy where are they now video.


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08 Aug 2020, 4:42 pm

WB, LTNS. How have you been? :D


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08 Aug 2020, 6:33 pm

I loved this show.

It brought tears to my eyes many times.

A favourite is difficult as they all touched me in some way.

There were also some funny moments as well as the joy and sadness.

Gets an A+ from me. Can't wait for series 2.

These type of programs rarely represent the whole spectrum of us.



LookWhoItIs
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10 Aug 2020, 12:09 am

I've watched the first three episodes now, and I can't help but notice that only the women are doing any rejecting, though the autistic men should get credit for handling the rejections well.

It's kinda silly that the show only pairs autistics with other autistics. We all know autistic women get NT men and while it's rarer, autistic men get NT women too. I don't know of many couples where they're both autistic.



that1weirdgrrrl
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11 Aug 2020, 12:30 am

I couldn't find this show on youtube, only Netflix .... and 3 episodes in.....

Pros:

I kinda enjoy seeing the asd/asd interaction.
...but that's probably just me..... I can see bits of myself or friends sometimes and it makes me laugh.

Cons:

Sometimes the narrator made it feel like a wildlife show, which was pretty awkward.
....but it seems to tone down as the episodes progress....

Overall: decent if you're into reality dating shows but not so keen on the melodrama that usually comes packaged with the genre.

:shrug:


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11 Aug 2020, 3:27 am

LookWhoItIs wrote:
I've watched the first three episodes now, and I can't help but notice that only the women are doing any rejecting, though the autistic men should get credit for handling the rejections well.

It's kinda silly that the show only pairs autistics with other autistics. We all know autistic women get NT men and while it's rarer, autistic men get NT women too. I don't know of many couples where they're both autistic.


I think it is more common than you may think. ;)



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11 Aug 2020, 5:25 am

I've just found out that Love On The Spectrum is apparently taking applicants for series 2. I think I'll apply.