Hopeless

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I don't see the point to things anymore. Honestly, I'm only setting myself up for failure, no matter how hard I try. Being single for over a year hasn't been easy for me. Without that special someone in my life, I'm nobody. Everything used to be so wonderful when I had somebody. Unfortunately, she ended up breaking my heart, which left an emotional wound that never seems to heal. I'll never be able to get the good times back that my ex and I shared because there is nobody else. What's more, I have to go about my everyday life, witnessing the happiness of others (which I can never have).

Most of those other guys who have a girlfriend, usually consist of arrogant ret*ds, who don't even deserve them in the first place. Ironically, one of my so-called "friends" fits the category (though he used to be one of my best friends). I'm always the one who's left out, unable to find "the one" I've been patiently waiting for. Despite how constructive I try to be with my life, my efforts only prove meaningless. Thinking positively doesn't contribute much, either.

I wish women could see the good qualities that I possess. I'm attractive, outgoing, and thoughtful towards others' feelings. Unlike other guys, I do NOT go around acting like some rude, illogical jerk. I'm not perfect, but I also know that I'm one of the nicer guys out there. Why can't women see any of these qualities? Sometimes, I cannot help but wonder what the point is in playing "Mr. Nice Guy". Sure, I care about others, but what do I get back in return? Nothing but crap every time. I wish I could find the right girl who would love me for who I am, and NOT just because of my body. Seems that may never happen though. There have been countless nights where I’ve cried myself to sleep, knowing that I’m alone in this world and that nothing ever seems to get better. I've lost all hope and motivation in life. I feel so torn apart and weak inside. I may never feel happy again.

I think I know how you're feeling. I've
been there a few times. And, always found
someone very good again. Yeah, takes longer,
but turns out better than what most of my
friends found. Don't despair.

Sadly, that's you're problem right there. They don't seem to like guys like that...like us.

Yeah, me too.

Good on you for not settling for the ones who are only attracted to your appearance. Keep holding out for something better; you'll be glad you did.

I hate being single too; but I far prefer it to being with the wrong person.

Same here.

Tim

Yes definitely don't settle for someone who is only attracted by your appearance. That's the trap my dad fell into, and he regrets that every day.

Herein lies your problem. When you feel like you're nothing if you're not in a relationship, you give off a vibe that tells others you're depressed and have no self esteem. People (both men and women) are usually not attracted to someone who gives off that vibe. The solution is to find happiness being by yourself. A relationship isn't going to magically make everything better. Start looking for what makes you happy in your life with the way it is right now. When you're no longer concerned about finding someone to fulfill you, that's when you'll end up meeting the right woman.

I'm only saying this because I see that I've been doing the same thing, and I've come to realize that I can only find real happiness in myself.

The problem here is that I can be so content with myself that I have no desire for a relationship. I think this is true for many content aspies... maybe...

In fact it's only when I am fairly lonely do I start actively trying to find a relationship.

I am not socially aware or active enough to attract someone by showing no interest whatsoever. I have to pursue a little, and have a tiny bit of desire and want and need in my heart...

Lost, I've been single for over seven years now... from how you feel about things I hope you never end up there.

Still though, I think there would be a lot of merit in finding happiness with yourself just because the quality of who you bring into your life will also improve when the opposite sex sees that your happy and secure in yourself without a partner - some may be less likely to go for you because if you don't 'need' them its intimidating, still its much better for your own happiness and sanity in the interem to find out what your best traits are, think about what you really look up to in other people, and shoot for those traits and things yourself.

BUT, be certain not to settle for someone
who is NOT attracted to your appearance
either. That desire is an important little
boost to your own feelings.

I want someone who really was attracted to me as a person. Not because of my appearance, income.

Also, I wouldn't want someone who was desperate, and who was going out with me because I was the first guy to show her any sort of attention.

Tim

i hope things get better for you guy. i think we are all trying to keep up with the worlds game and sadly most of us are loseing