Scarcity, Competition, and Aggression

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It seems to me that many attractive women in my age range already have a boyfriend, a fiancé, or in a few cases even a husband! The pool of smart, good-looking women with good personalities (as opposed to "bitchy"), worthwhile interests, and ability to plan for the future are a scarce resource; and there is considerable competition for them. As it is, I happen to have a very high sex drive, so I've also been looking for reasonably physically attractive women for a purely sexual get-together; again, demand is higher than supply.

It seems to me that, as I have been trying to attract women without success, the attendant frustration has made me increasingly aggressive, forceful, and uncompromising in particular towards the competition: other men. I have recently read this article, which confirms my suspicion. My theory is that sexual frustration increases testosterone circulation, which increases the tendency towards competitive behaviors so as to get a mate.

Some ways this anticompetitive aggression may manifest itself are running slow drivers off the highway, threatening the male friends of a potential mate, attacking the reputation of competitors, and using (preemptive) physical force to deter competitors (I am not implying I do all these things). Also, this sexual frustration leads to a preference for women showing signs of ready sexual availability: revealing clothes, seductive behavior, and possibly reputation for promiscuity.

Other ways this sexual frustration may manifest itself are pursuing women for a longer period of time, relative imperviousness to risk, ambitiousness (to acquire the wealth and other resources that make a man more desirable to women), and resorting to tricks to put women in sexual positions (e.g., posing as a modeling photographer for "swimsuits" or "lingerie" and then perhaps prodding the woman to take off all her clothes because the nude pictures might "pay better").

Anyone else notice this?

This is definitely the most shallow post I have ever read in my life.

Please lower your expectations of what you want in a girl.

Typical, you can only trade for what you're worth. Most aspies live in a fantasy land when it comes to their worth, how about posting a pic on hotornot and throwing it up for public scrutiny, maybe a video on youtube?

If you want a girl who looks good you're going to have to work on your personality, as an aspie you should already know you're way behind NT's in the charm department.

I'm sure a similar group exists for women.

Hilarious.

Assuming that the ration of men to women is roughly even, it follows that there are as many single women as single men. Secondly, upon observing the attractiveness levels of taken women, I can't say that attractiveness is a factor - the ugly ones seem to hook up just as easily - thus it is probable that there are a substantial number of single, attractive women. Now, since there are relatively few women on the Internet, and also relatively few in the workplace, what I ask you all is this: Where are they all hiding? And secondly, I propose an adventurous expedition to find this place and go there. Who's with me?

That is hilarious

Yes, that is hilarious!

Tim

Heh, I think they're all too shy or too busy to be there. They exist though, don't get it twisted.

I don't think the seats in that picture should be empty .

Back to the OP's Topic- I seriously think you should go for a girl who is OKAY looking, maybe even somewhat attractive, instead of a girl who looks like a model.

I much rather date a girl who is ugly but is smart and can financially support herself than a girl who is really hot but is also an airhead and expects her husband to pay for everything.

Its not about finding the perfect girl- Its about lowering your expectations so an average girl will be good enough for your high ego.

I lol'd.

Then you don't understand humor.



Only if you can mean it. Otherwise, you'll always
be thinking, "I settled for THIS?" which won't
be fair to the other.

Well, I don't see myself being with that type of woman. Totally out of my ball park. The type of women you describe will find someone they feel is high enough quality no bother.

I believe as non-mainstream people, our ballpark is non-mainstream women. To define that I mean not necessarily Aspies, but women who will find it hard to find a partner for whatever reason.

Would you consider dating older women, perhaps those who have been through something i.e. a bad relationship which has ended in divorce or separation? That is where I'm setting my sights and it is what I feel suits me, and this way you may well still be able to find someone attractive.

I never said supermodel hot, but obviously physical attractiveness (among other variables) matters. I don't see why you're advocating I settle for a girl with traits I don't find attractive. I don't want to date just to be dating.

What I am seeing here is a case of projection: You have a "high ego" and are hopping mad that you've realized you must be "lowering your expectations so an average girl" is "good enough." Obviously consciously thinking you must look for girls who are less than what you would naturally consider attractive is going to be a depressing view (and lead to nothing but a series of failed relationships).

Personally, there is no "exact feature" that I look for in a woman. Its literally impossible for me to put my finger on it. Either I find them attractive or I dont, but my range in what I find attractive is high by chance, not because I sexually bored myself with my hand.

I am somewhat similar. I am rarely romantically attracted to a woman (maybe it's because I don't have any female friends—or male friends for that matter) although lust comes easily. Certainly attraction is a feeling, but we all know certain things are likely to predispose us to like some people more than others. For example, I would find someone with a highly religious bent repulsive on a romantic scale because I am nonreligious.