Am I a nutcracker?

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Hi everyone,

Some of you might remember I was telling you about my going to see a psychiatrist (I in fact have seen two), and they both say I am officially an Aspie. So there's my double-diagnosis.

I think I've been a kind of nutcracker over the years , even before I'd heard about things like A.S.D.'s. I've almost always picked up girls who have a set of severe problems of their own like bipolar disorder and/or weird in some way. And they've been attracted to me. But not one friendship has lasted. I've had about 2 or 3 girlfriends, and, like I say, they all had some personality problem or another. In other words, I've cracked open all the "nutty" girls.

I particularly like it when some girl starts lavishing the desired attention on me, so I "warm" up to them, and hang around them, not being aware, of course, if they like that or not. That was the case with a girl with bipolar disorder. We're both in a multimedia PC team working together so I thought we could become good friends. But somehow or other, the visits we were paying each other slowly started to dwindle, and now I haven't even spoken to her for weeks on end!

I think the fact that I've cracked open one "nut" after another and breaking communication with them without me doing a thing, has resulted in me being all over people when they show the smallest amount of interest in me. I have a nicely-running friendship with someone who's got some personality problem or another for a nice amount of time, then it dies.

Am I doomed to go through life like this???

I think maybe I'm missing your point.

People who deal with similar issues tend to better understand and are more willing to trust each other. So it's not surprising you have a knack of finding and becoming friends with them. But many girls have trust issues. If they have neurological or psychology issues, their trust is even that much less.

When you come on too strong in a relationship, girls run. You will seem desperate. Don't try so hard. It's common that people find the right person when they weren't trying at all.

There are many reasons people don't make a relationships work. You have Aspergers and are more likely to drift away from people naturally.

But what stuck me is that you keep using the term nut to describe these girls. Do you want to have relationships with them? Lose the attitude.

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Quite right you are there. And somewhere along the line, even if there are a dozen other things I don't pick up like body language, I seem to somehow pick up that I'm once again "friendless". And then I'm back to square one; and not even looking for a relationship - just a regular, devoted friend!

Any comments on that?