Does anyone get embarrassed about love

Page 1 of 1 [ 7 posts ] 

nebula
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 22 Dec 2005
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 101

21 Dec 2007, 9:02 pm

Ill get straight to the point with this subject, but I find the whole idea of love to emotionally hard to deal with and get very embarrassed about external perceptions of love in things like showing someone I fancy them or finding it hard to imagine kissing in public in front of people.

Other issues are if I fancy someone who looks unworthy of other peoples judgement then I get an internal battle of thinking I would be mocked and ridiculed by other people for having a not so attractive relationship and I get really angry for my weakness for being a coward to throw away possible love over being fear of judgement.

Another thing that I get is that I was talking to my mum in a shop the other day when I noticed a gal I liked the look of, yet I started laughing and calling her to my mum even though I liked her loads and I didn't want my mum to see my emotions and felt embarrassed about how to deal with my feelings.

Don't anyone get me wrong though as I tend to think into the fantasy of love with such importance yet I hate to confront love for myself in life and hate myself for that reason. I also think that the pure ecstasy of being with someone that I loved to be something that would be to much for me to handle and that I have had to live my whole life without that so that would be to much of strange powerful existence for me to bare.

Do any of you lot feel the same or do you want to argue with me for being very wrong, I look forward to your replies.

Nebs



DejaQ
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Feb 2007
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,719
Location: The Silver Devastation

21 Dec 2007, 9:14 pm

I don't like to deal with love because I'm afraid of what people think of me. I never believe for too long that someone I fancy could fancy me back, so I try my best not to act interested in people.

I'm embarrassed because I'm kind of needy and insecure, and I'm afraid of how this will affect a potential partner's perception of me.

I generally can't talk about these sorts of things with people I know, because I'm also afraid of what they might think.



nebula
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 22 Dec 2005
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 101

21 Dec 2007, 9:24 pm

I get that feeling loads about women I fancy and am constantly in a internal battle about is love in the eye of the beholder because I find it sooooo hard to believe that women would go with someone ugly that as a good personality yet they do.

I am either a complete idiot to keep believing things that I have witnessed or I am that much in a world of my own that I wish women would see love through the vision of the eye of the beholder. My be its the 3rd eye that makes me fall in love at first sight who knows yet all I ever get back is perhaps women noticing my pathetic lack of body language, fake confidence signals etc, oh and I also think that women know if we have genetic conditions in some scientific way.

Maybe I have the satanic gene somewhere that they can see in my eye color or is it that I give off a smell that say's warning this man might kill me. Oh sorry thats my dark funny side showing sorry.



ToadOfSteel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,157
Location: New Jersey

21 Dec 2007, 9:34 pm

I get cynical about love, because every advance I make ends up in rejection...



nebula
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 22 Dec 2005
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 101

21 Dec 2007, 9:37 pm

I am off to bed, keep up your replies Ill pick up again as soon as I awake.



mikebw
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Sep 2007
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,283
Location: Florida

21 Dec 2007, 10:13 pm

Yeah.

I worry that someone will notice that I like a girl, and poke fun at me in front of her about it, or in front of others. So I ignore her and try to act uninterested.

I worry about being rejected, or initially accepted but later rejected upon scrutiny. I fantasize about all kinds of ways it could go, but it always turns out bad. Thinking to much about things almost always guarantees that I won't act.

There's a girl at work I like. I think she's really pretty and nice, but I'm almost sure she thinks I don't like her. While I'd like to let her know I like her, I think that would be more problematic. So I've been trying to act nicer, saying "hello" with a smile instead of just grunting "hey".

But with my ex-girlfriend, I had no problem showing affection publicly. She was usually the one that didn't want to kiss, hug, or hold hands in public.



psychedelic
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 27 Nov 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 245
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow

22 Dec 2007, 1:11 am

wow....

Much of what you guys are saying is me sometime in the past. As of now, I kinda don't care if a woman thinks I like her. I try to suppress it but it comes out anyway and it doesn't bother me as much anymore.

I have been weight training and I seem to have a good future ahead of me (assuming my relative lack of people skills doesn't screw me over). That helps to add courage. Also, I think humiliation doesn't sting as hard as you get older. You somehow get desensitized (a bit, anyway).

You should start weight training if you haven't already. If you're going to college or anything else that would help you stand out in a positive way, great. If not, get to it.

Even if it looks hard, you might not have much too loose on the one hand and much to gain on the other.


_________________
If there's such a thing as god, he's a sick bastard.