How to tell if someone is attracted for your profession?

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I´ve been always rejected by girls when I tell my feelings. I tried very hard but I don´t know what to do. It´s very frustrating. But now I´m a brand new physician and my father and one of my few friends told me about the people who show interest in someone, only for your profession. How can you tell if someone is doing that?


P.D.: Forgive my english. It´s not my native language.

I'm surprised that this wouldn't have happened while you were in medical school, studying to be a physician.

What country are you from? My dad is very awkward and strange, and he was finished med school when he got married.

I don´t know the real reason but my classmates always thought about my Asperger Sindrome (obviously, they are physicians now) but they talked about that in my final week. I didn´t realize about my autistic behaviur. They criticized me because I was talking about my hobbies all the time and about my lack of empathy. Maybe I didn´t tell if someone care about me. There was a classmate who laughes with my stories and she listened to me with attention and I fell in love with her, but she offered her friendship.

I´m from Chile, Southamerica. The land of Jodorowsky.

She sounds nice.

In the USA, doctors make piles of money, and therefore are considered an economically desireable mate (for those wishing to marr for money). In other countries, doctors might not be so rich.

Well, in my country there is a general belief that doctors make money. It´s true until some point. But it depends of your vocation and skills.

Yes, she sounds nice. Even she tell me when other classmates were saying lies. She said: They are kidding. Don´t trust.
But I was in my final days on medical school and I was very anxious because I probably will not see her anymore. So I wrote a letter (9 pages, I never wrote a letter since primary school in my language lessons) but now I think it was rushed. She was in 6th grade and I was in 7th grade but we worked together. Now I´m a graduate and she continues in the medical school.

So, are you feeling that she has rejected you?

After the letter, she said: I don´t have time now. But we can be friends. Nothing will change what I think.
I said: OK. When you feel free to talk to me, just contact me.
But I was very anxious, really. I talked with her without eye contact and I didn´t know what to say.
The weekend after that, I was watching "Donnie Darko" and there was a scene when the lead character walks with Gretchen Ross. I was very identified, because Darko was so akward in that scene. So, I thought: Maybe if she watches this movie, she can understand me.
Two days later, I brought my "Director´s cut Donnie Darko" DVD and I talked with her. She was very busy in her work. I was trying to not bother. When we talked, she said: I´m very busy. So I passed my DVD to her. Inside the case, there was a note: I hope you understand the idea.
Two weeks later I aproached to her and I offered my skills in Pediatrics, because she had exams at that time, and she suddenly said: I´m going to look for your movie.
I said: Don´t worry.
She said. I tried to watch it two times, but I fell asleep. I don´t think the third time works and believe me, I have endurance for movies. I received the DVD and I said: I have to tell you something (I composed a song and I dreamed about her 3 times).
She said: I don´t have time. What do you want to tell me? I ´m gonna get vacations and probably I will not have time. Even we talk, nothing changes this.
I was accepting the rejection, so I was mute and she posed her hand in my arm and she said: I´m sorry.
I don´t talk with her since that time

Last edited by Temucano on 05 Dec 2007, 2:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Eres Chileno!! !!

Answering your original question, I don't think there's any sure way to tell if someone is after your for the money you'll be making. The best way is to forget about and concentrate on whether or not you like the person. Also, if you give yourself time you know her, you'll increase you likelihood of finding out her intentions, good or otherwise.

(Yes, I speak Spanish but not very well.)

Yes, I´m chilean. Chile is so unknown for many, but known for other reasons. Rapa Nui (Easter Island), Antarctica, Atacama desert ( the driest place in the world), the south is almost a carbon copy of New Zealand, Alejandro Jodorowsky, even Alan Moore showed the Chiloe Island in the final episodes of"Swamp Thing: American Gothic" comics etc. Forgive me if I´m off topic but I´m proud of my country. There is a foreign language forum but there is no chileans at this time.
Returning to the question, thanks for the advice. (I´m still thinking in her, but I accepted the truth)

dale su espacio, los sentimientos no se pueden forzar.
solo sigue siendo amable con ella, nunca se sabe lo que pueda pasar en el futuro.
entiendo que solo te interese ella, pero como decia mi abuela "un clavo saca otro clavo" y aunque ella te guste no te haria mal buscar a otras chicas.
suerte

I accepted the truth, I don´t want to talk with her if she doesn´t want to. But now I´m out of the medical school. So, the only new people will be the health care team, because I don´t have real new friends (I don´t know how to meet new people). So, that´s the reason to write this topic. Suddenly, somenone can approach to me with fake feelings.

I know what it is to be rejected, and you are MUCH better off simply accepting it than trying to beg.

I've never dated Latin American women, but, from what I understand, many are very conservative, looking for a good provider (correct me if I'm wrong). I can understand the concern that some might really be more interested in your money than in you as a person. But, I'd say, give them a chance.

I didn´t know her very well but a female friend of her tell me some important things. For example, she has two friends. She doesn´t like to go out of home. She lives alone (actually with a dog). She eats just few meals with a rigid pattern. And she is very honest even tough sometimes. The friend told me that I was the first person in her life who did something like that.
Even she thought about as like a married couple in the future, so she tried to help me a lot.

About latin american women: there are many countries. Probably you are right about the conservative behaviour. But the argentinians and brazilian women are very different.
In the case of my country, there are different types of women (There is a lot of ethnic origins). The woman I loved has italian heritage.