Asking a girl up to your place after 1st date.Inappropriate?

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Question for girls mostly. Do you find this inappropriate?

I'm a guy, and I find it inappropriate. I've always heard it was the third date when it becomes appropriate.

Tim

Only if they're easy. You don't want the type of girl that does that on the first night.

I thought the game was this... man asks you if you'd like to come back every single time you see him, first date included. This is ok. However, you have to say no at least a couple of times to avoid being perceived as a slag.

It is inappropriate.

There is no magic number though. You can ask and she may say no, but that doesn't mean she doesn't want to, it just means she isn't ready to.

I think I will be the contraversial one on this one, but I would say, it all depends on the situation. I mean put it this way, I've been with girls and slept with them pretty quickly, but we still had nice relationships together, it didn't really matter how quickly we slept together. At the end of the day, if you feel it's right, then why not, not harming anyway. Ok ok, the whole feeling thing can be difficult for us aspies, but, it will either happen or not if you both want it to.

I take the view on, it doesn't matter if it's "appriopriate" or not, I am not anyone else but me, I mean f**k knows how my gf puts up with my boring convo, other people might lable that "inapropriate"...Just see what happens, there is no right or wrong answer unfortunatly, which makes this difficult for us lot ay?

I agree with this. It probably is only appropriate if it really feels right.

It's gotta depend on the girl, the feelings, the mood etc..

and ... what are you asking her back for.... Just coffee?

When you're young, you tend to wait a long time for sex etc.. but once you've both had a few relationships, the waiting game isn't likely to be as big a deal - though I can't really talk.

I don't know. I guess it would be a combination of how well you knew each other before you started dating, how well the date went, and personal morality.

I've found at 17+ when I started going clubbing it was a bit more complex and took longer, but at 20-21 before I met my gf, there was hardly any waiting infact I found people where just more mature about weather it was just sex or more and it wasnt really an issue, things just happened. Guess it all depends though

My simple answer would be "yes"

It might not even occur to me to think beyond the literal implications of the invitation. I would not equate "want to come over?" with "want to have sex?" But this explains some funny situations I've been in. My dad was the same way. He told me that once in college he took a girl out on a date and when they got back on campus she asked him if he'd like to come up and see her dorm room. He replied, "No, thank you. All of the dorm rooms have the same basic design."

I think it's inappropriate.

Yeah, exactly what I was going to say...

in fact, took me reading all these posts to realize that... I'd be the one saying "sure" to come up and hang (if I liked the person), but not think about anything more happening whatsoever... so of course I'd be stuck in an odd situation...

but whats wrong with going up to hang out? <.<

That's what he meant! lol! I was so confused by this post at first :S

I'm not a girl, but I think it would depend on how the question was interpreted and how it was meant to be interpreted.

I've invited women to my house before with no thoughts of having sex or even kissing.
I have been invited in to women's homes with no expectation that there was going to be anything other than more conversation and an opportunity to see someone's stuff.
I like seeing places I have not seen before... I like to see if they have books and which ones they are, furniture, artwork, the different appliances they may have in their kitchens... stuff like that.

I'm trying to remember a time when being invited in to a girl's home made me think there was going to be sex involved.
I really don't think it has happened unless we had discussed it beforehand.