Women is a no sex relationship ok with you?

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TrueDave
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21 Jan 2008, 4:55 pm

I'm curious.

It seems sex has caused more problems than its worth in a lot of my dating. after sex a lot of the wonderment was gone. I still want to be with someone in a dating way. I had even hoped to maybe wait untill mariaage.

However my dating life slowed down when I started sayin "slow down" on the first or second date. I realized i had given in many times when I did not want to.I did'nt want to rush things. They quit calling immediately.

I also judge a lot by the fact that my longest most loving relationship was non sexual for the first year.



GrantZilla
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21 Jan 2008, 5:03 pm

Here's the problem. Women are not use to men telling them to "slow down." They are use to men just itching to give them a jump. So when a guy re-buffs their advances, they take it personally. They most likely think you are not attracted to them, or gay.

And remember, women got needs to. They may say sex is not everything, but trust me, they like it too lol. So if they like you, but your not wanting to fullfill their physical needs, then that's where the problem comes.

Just going to have to look harder to find someone that's willing to take it as slow as you.



sarahstilettos
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21 Jan 2008, 5:05 pm

questions

first of all, by 'sex' do you mean only penetrative sex, or what else would you include? Anything that goes beyond kissing? Where would you draw the line? Because penetrative sex I could very eaily live without - not being able to indulge in any other intimate activities I would find rather more difficult.

Second, you give the impression that this isn't forever, you just want things to happen more slowly? That is very different to saying that the relationship would *never* involve sex.



TrueDave
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21 Jan 2008, 5:18 pm

I just want to work up to it. Put emotions in front of hormones.

By sex I mean anything that involves removing your underwear.
(Althouth I know from experience that once the shirts come off nobodies thinking sensibly! :lol: )

I have had too many quick sex relationships. I think a big part of my standpoint now is I'm older. I have already sown my wild oats.

I want sex NOT to be the first thing you say in a relationship, something worked up to with true meaning.

I know as each year goes by and EVERYTHING moves faster this is becoming less and less fashionable . . .



Obres
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21 Jan 2008, 5:18 pm

Ugh, don't even get me started on this one. To answer your question, no, it's not OK with them. Things get uncomfortable very quickly when a woman wants sex more than a guy.



hartzofspace
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21 Jan 2008, 5:24 pm

Where were you when I was looking for a relationship? :? :) Seriously, I wish some guys out there could know how much of a turn on I find it, when a male creature desires to take it slow! I wouldn't have gotten into half the time wasting, crappy relationships that I experienced, if this had been the case.

Keep looking, TrueDave. Cause I'm sure there are more women like me out there.


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TrueDave
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21 Jan 2008, 5:37 pm

Thanks for the affermation.

I'm not looking for it , I am just curious. Also I am ashamed. It wasn't untill now I remembered to use a word that should have been FIRST in my original post.

" Love "



chocolate_kitties
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21 Jan 2008, 5:40 pm

I wouldn't mind a no sexl relationship but then again, I don't even like sex. Most females do.



SeaBright
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21 Jan 2008, 8:08 pm

No. It would be an incompatibility.


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juliekitty
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21 Jan 2008, 8:21 pm

Just say you want to wait until you're in a committed relationship (that's what it sounds like you're saying).

Women should respect your decision, just as I'd expect men to respect women making that decision.

Whether or not they're okay with it is a different issue, and that will vary with the individual.



pakled
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21 Jan 2008, 9:37 pm

women are on a spectrum like that as well; some can't stand to be touched, some can't stand not to.

I think maybe the word you're looking for is romance. Eight zillion romance novels must be being bought by somebody..;) go get 'em...;)



EvilKimEvil
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21 Jan 2008, 10:49 pm

Personally, I could not have a relationship without sex. If I had been with someone long enough to have an intense bond, and something happened that brought an end to the sex (like some kind of accident), I would stay in the relationship and just go without. But no, I would not willingly get into a nonsexual relationship. Sex is too much fun.



SirJoseph
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22 Jan 2008, 1:49 am

a relationship without sex is called platonic friends. haha no jk jk. if you dont want to hold off on sex thats your thing. the sappy emotional bond isnt for me so i just hang out with girls who are "sexually liberated". no i dont mean sluts.


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Space
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22 Jan 2008, 1:51 am

TrueDave wrote:
I'm curious.

It seems sex has caused more problems than its worth in a lot of my dating. after sex a lot of the wonderment was gone. I still want to be with someone in a dating way. I had even hoped to maybe wait untill mariaage.

However my dating life slowed down when I started sayin "slow down" on the first or second date. I realized i had given in many times when I did not want to.I did'nt want to rush things. They quit calling immediately.

I also judge a lot by the fact that my longest most loving relationship was non sexual for the first year.

I have heard this from some men. I think it is because men peak sexually at 18-20, but women it's 30+ (or something like that).

Anyways, the sex is supposed to be better if you wait, so more power to you.



RightGalaxy
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13 Jan 2015, 9:59 am

Actually, I'd prefer it to be that way. Always have. It's a miracle that I even had two kids. Wha..wha??? Where'd they come from??! !! I wish I could've immaculately conceived (no offense to any religion).



Tim_Tex
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13 Jan 2015, 12:23 pm

This thread is approximately 7 years old.

But no, a sexless relationship would not work out for me. Even a relationship where a partner was saving herself for marriage would not go well.


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