Lifeblind wrote:
The story goes like this: I cannot legitimately be called an NT because I am far from it. I do not know if I have AS aside for your typical online tests which I sincerely doubt in validity. According to said tests, I am "most likely" an aspie. However, the person I love is diagnosed/self-diagnosed with Asperger's and unfortunately for me, this resulted in very serious hostility and confusion. It had seemed to me that the person I loved was no longer the same person, as they did not accept my personal point of view regarding their diagnosis, that being the diagnosis was no excuse for behaving negatively towards me. Granted, this person came off as negative prior to diagnosis, however I was very accepting of who they were, regardless of whatever type of diagnosis. I had and still have a lot of love which did not seem to be well received.
On the other hand, if I did something that was perceived as a threat or negative, these acts were treated as though I was a foreign person and not someone who genuinely cared. Nor were they forgotten or forgiven. As it currently stands, the person I love does not want to have anything to do with me any longer, and has taken a wholly accusational tone towards any communication I have attempted. All of this seems to revolve around AS and perception of the relationship, which was not always easy and at times was outright difficult. I had sometimes wondered if my love was actually serious about the feelings that were expressed. Perhaps they were confused feelings and were not meant for me. My love would even go so far as to say that there was no love and that I had never really shown any love, which to me is completely absurd! Of course I loved.
This is where public opinion comes in. I am so hurt and confused and I admittedly do not understand AS nor do I have understanding of how to handle what seems to be very sensitive subject matter. I myself am a very sensitive person, AS or not, and I get hurt very, very easily. Does that mean I am now allowed to be in love with an aspie? If the person I love has AS, accepts it, but still chooses to push me away, am I to just accept this and move on? Has anyone else experienced relationship problems as a result of an AS diagnosis? Is there no way to make these types of relationships work? Where is my thinking incorrect in this situation? I am reaching out because I seriously care but can find no reconciliation. Please help me understand why someone with Asperger's would not want the love and care I have tried to give on so many occasions.
I would recommend moving on full stop. Not that trying to be harsh but it doesn't sound like something to pursue any further.
21 Aug 2008, 1:21 am
