Confused, help me out

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I'm not sure if this is a good spot to put this thread or not but I need some help here. Esspecially people who know about gender studies or transgender / cross dressing related topics.

First of, I'm heterosexual. But I'm only attracted to women who Imitate men in terms of dress and behavor. I've been into Tomboys ever since an early age and it has taken me from my high school years until about the begaining of the summer to figure it out. But I'm starting to reconize that the term Tomboy is in a different use then it was in the 1980s. Today it seems like you can take a feminine women and if she likes something that guys usually like, she's automaticly a Tomboy. Unlike the 1980s when women would dress, talk and behave like a guy.

Most people would say that what I'm talking about are Butch Lesbians which isn't 100% true.

Almost like

The Spirit of a man inside the body of a women. But probably not as extreme as a transman.

My latest research target is The Third Gender, which is a theory discribing cross-gender behavors plus saying that they feel that they can't conform to either male or female. But not trying to become a guy kind of throws out the theory.

I was thinking almost like a transman without feeling that they are a 100% male inside and needing to do a sex change.


I really love those kinds of girls even though I've rarely meet them.

A Really nonfeminine or typical women behavor.

Like a Tomboy but more spiciffic.



I now find myself not being attracted tof feminine women. My last crushes were feminine but I was always attracted to features that seemed male like to me (including: thick eyebrows, short hair, into intellegent sciences, not into make-up, wearing ripped jeans) little things like that. But as I think back on it, I start to notice that what I liked about them never existed within them in the first place.



Another thing.

I noticed that most heterosexuals are like this...............

Male is masculine, domininate partner, likes the gentleness of the female
Female is feminine, submissive partner, like the strongness of the male




For me it's reversed. I can say Role-Reversal but it's only applying to gender social norms and not so much so behavoir.


Plus I notice that when I think of these masculine Tomboy types, I start breathing heavily, my voice starts to be more high pitch and breath like (almost like a feminine women), I feel my body becoming more gentle when it comes to arm movements and not moving my fingers as much.

One time I took some colored artsy postels that I had for awhille, snuck into my bathroom and trying to see if I would enjoy cross-dressing. I used the postels like make up and I had a peice of long silk and some paper clips and pins so I can make a quick tempoary dress. I liked the silk matterial, the make up seemed fun. But I did all this when I was thinking about the Tomboys that I liked. But as soon as I was done thinking, I started to freak out and so I quickly cleaned all the pastels off of my face and I think that I cryed a little bit.


But anyway, I don't think that It's related to Asperger's Syndrome because the friends that I have in College (also Aspie) are straight and the typical heterosexuals.


But I wanted to still ask on here because I feel confortable talking with other Aspies plus I think some here are part of the LGBT community.

Yahoo Answers hasn't helped me much. They just want quick points on their profile.

At the risk of sounding daft, may I ask exactly what your question is here, specifically? It seems like you're asking for validation of some sort, but I can't be sure.

I was interested, however, in your anecdote about your experiments with makeup and how you reacted to it. Can you pinpoint the reason(s) for why you flipped out when you stopped thinking about the kind of girl you liked? Did you want to crossdress to make your gender identity on the outside match what you see yourself as on the inside, and it just didn't feel right, or did something else happen?

Though not actually considering myself part of the GLBT community, I'm definitely more androgynous, sometimes even more masculine, than feminine. I like action movies a lot more than chick flicks, comic books more than "girl magazines," I'd rather be the one providing and in charge than be the one "dominated," and I like to think I look damn good in a tuxedo. As with most things involving being different from the crowd, my advice is to do what makes you feel good and forget about everyone else's opinion so long as you're doing them no harm, and eventually people of like mind will find you.

Good luck to you!

Yeah. I kind of flyped out because I felt that the cross-dress test kind of scared me afterwords.

I feel like I'm the only one who feels this way about masculine women.

In terms of the cross-dressing, if you're still interested, it might be best to find someone who knows a lot about it and get their advice on what would look good on you. Perhaps it was the entire concept of the thing, however - if it didn't feel right inherently, then it's probably best to know now.

I'm sure you're not the only person who likes tomboys - they're few and far between (sad but true!), but the odds are that there are others. Just because there's fewer of you, though, doesn't mean that such a preference is any less valid than a preference for girly girls. Besides, though this might not be of any concern to you, but perhaps the good news could be said to be that this way, you have less competition.

Again, good luck in your search, both for yourself and for that person you are interested in finding.

Yeah, thanks.

I think that I'm seriously into cross-dressing. It's just that Tomboys make me feel like I should be the feminine one and they should be the masculine one.

Almost like I want to take in the girlfriend role and they take in the boyfriend role. If I ever get lucky.

At times I feel like I wished that I was gay but I'm not. I'm stuck between, but not Bi.

It's like I'm attracted to the Women body but the behavor, dress, and the masculine man spirit which I feel needs to be in a women's body.

It's strange I know.

You might be just a submissive male looking for a dominant female, simple as that.