Parents Forcing an Arranged Marriage Upon Me

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Unfortunately, my parents are forcing an arranged marriage upon me. This Fact is due to multiple reasons. For example, our family originates from the Indian culture. In India it is common practice for a Male's parents to seek out a satisfactory Female spouse and vice versa. Since I can remember I have always resented the idea of marriage. I simply do not Understand why two people would sacrifice much of their freedom and jeopardize their chances of future success simply for the sake of love.
I simply do not comprehend and never have comprehended the reasons for marriage. Why would anyone want to create a relatively un-detachable bond as well as have children? This creates an atmosphere were ones whole life becomes a slave to, in my opinion, a pointless causation of:
1. Working
2. Feeding and Housing the Family
3. Repeat
ect.

When Person is not married so many possibilities arise. Time is their for Exploration of our Biosphere. An unmarried person does not need to devout resources to an unnecessary cause of multiple children in this already currently over populated earth. An unmarried person has time to discover new knowledge and invest time in advancing human society. These are simply a hand full of reasons out of the many hundreds that exist which further an important idea.

Since grade school I always had the lingering fear of marriage. I knew that eventually my parents would create this situation, unfortunately I never thought it would come so soon.

I have always obeyed my parents and accomplished for them even their faintest desires.

I am in a very difficult situation. In my religion it is very close to a taboo for someone to not get married. In My religion raising children and caring for children is how blessings are achieved.

Should I follow my parents request or reject and face shunning for eternity.

Would I would like to ask the Wrong Planet Virtual Community is what your opinions are based on the above information?
As I am sure you have realized their is much more information I could share with you regarding this subject. Unfortunatley due to chronographical Concerns I am only able to display the above information.

I hope you will take the little information I have given to you and from that make a logical comment based on this situation.

In advance I would like to thank all for their feedback, opinions, comments and of coarse Ideas.

Well first off how old are you and where do you live?

You shouldn't have to in a....shall we say democratic society but if you're in India I guess it would be different.

No I don't believe in marriage unless the couple to be feel it is right for them and are emotionally ready for it. Not everyone marries for children..at least in western society. My advice is you may become unhappy if you do follow with this recourse of action.

I don't know you since you only have one post or how old you are. I wonder if you can't find refuge for a while away from them if you're old enough to leave them for a while.

I can't understand or comprehend that kind of culture for parents not to love their children unconditionally. That is..if they don't respect your wishes, what will they do? Disown you?

Anyway, in short that's how I see your situation. I can't fathom if I had parents like that. I've heard of some people getting help from outside resources when in abusive families. I know that this probably wouldn't be seen as abuse but you some of the same tactics if it's that bad or you really disagree with their plan of action.

No one can force a marriage upon you. I have a close friend from India who has gone through the entire routine (girls picked out for him, etc) every time he goes back to India. He's in his 40s now and he's single.

If you get married because someone else wants you to, you're caving to their will instead of yours.

It's my opinion in this day and age that marriage should be of your own choice and not of your parents. This is your life and you should not be forced into a situation that you don't wish to be in. If you don't want this, then say no.

Reject them. That's what I would do. My parents are not worth my happiness in life.
If you go with your parents, you will probably live a miserable life.

Do you know her? How does she feel about it? Perhaps if you two get together on this, you could tell your parents you'll get married after ____ (college, promotion, whatever.) That would buy you some time at least.

I'm having trouble even imagining you situation, but there has to be a way to comprimise somewhere. Maybe you could agree (with her) to have an open marriage, you'd essentially just be roommates and could still pretty much do whatever (or whoever) you want.
Sorry in advance if you find that one offensive.

I'm in the UK where it recognised that there is a clear difference between arranged marriages, to which both man and woman are agreeable, and enforced marriages, where one, usually the woman, is married against her will.

I don't know where you live, and I understand that it will be very difficult for you to disobey your parents and that there are all sorts of pressures on you to comply with their wishes, but if you do not wish to be married then you should try to dissuade them from arranging a marriage for you.

If they still attempt to force you to marry, there may be charities and organisations which can help you. I know they exist in the UK, but don't know what help is available where you are.

Worst-case scenario, find another country and request asylum...

Although you mention Indian culture, it's not actually clear which country you're living in.

If you're living in some other countries, the authorities can take steps to protect you.

You don't say how old you are.

You don't say what religion you/your family are.

Maybe you're sikh or hindu, in which case I have very little knowledge and am afraid I don't know enough about those religions.

If you're muslim, then it's possible for you to pursuade your family that forced marriages are actually unIslamic, and that marriages within the Islamic faith must have the consent of both parties.

You could always try pointing out that while your parents may think it's somehow 'shameful' of you to be single and/or to refuse marriage offers, how much more 'shameful' culturally speaking, would it be, when you get divorced in a couple of years down the line, and your respective families start arguing about who is to blame, the groom/bride meaning the husband/wife, blaming the couple concerned, when it fact they should be looking in the mirror... and by then, it's often too late to restrict the harm to one generation, because there may be children involved...

I would also point out that sexual intercourse in such circumstances may be considered rape.

I would not marry anyone unless I love them. It is illegal in many countries(as well as India) to have forced marriages. If you live in India, take them to court.

I believe Article 24 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights states that no one should be forced to marry someone along with other things.

I am sure you can find stuff in the Indian federal constitution as well as your state constitution as well.

Good luck!

Oh please! This is not middleages anymore Why would they tell You what to do? You have Your rights, You can just say no. You are religious? If so, than I am sorry for You - because if You are consistent in Your faith You will agree anyway... Who would like to follow the religion which makes Your life even more miserable and makes You unhappy? Only fanatics, who think that pain and suffering will lead them to God.

Marriage does not equal children.

I don't know why people always instantly make that connection. My husband and I don't want children, but we are still happy together...

This is more a cultural issue than an aspie issue, and I don't think it'd be easy for any of us to give you advice without understanding the culture. If you're living in America, you can just tell your parents to fuck off. Then again, American kids would never be so extremely deferential to their parents in the first place. It's your life, obviously, not theirs, so the worst they could do is disown you (and you probably want to avoid being put out of their lives).

Bozewani speaks truth. Find out what the law is.

I have just finished my 6th Year of College.

I am 22 years old.

I lived in India until I was 12.

I currently live in Astana, Kazakhstan.

My Family members are Conservative Hindus.