Changing regions?

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Joined: 6 Feb 2005
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07 Dec 2008, 2:23 pm

Right now my friends are all feeling very pressed to get out of Ohio, part of the reason is that they're striking out here in terms of relationships. While I'm never one to say that women strictly go for a***holes or lay out the usual nice-guy stuff, I have noticed that people from this state are unusually cynical and screwed-up in the choices they end up making and - yes - I think its time to change my own surroundings, partly because I've never really lived anywhere else (aside from 8 years near Ann Arbor Michigan when I was a child) and I'm curious to see just what kinds of currents will prevail.

They're kicking around a lot of ideas - one possibility is LA (which, I can't call that much of an improvement by my best guess) and the other is Phoenix. From the discussions I've had with them I'm almost starting to wonder about something else; while its true that many here who complain about the opposite sex may just be doing so to assuage themselves, I also wonder how much a specific area really has an effect on it. My friends and all have conservative leanings, not hard-religious, but generally conservative and this (area around Cuyahoga county) is very liberalized. Maybe that's part of the issue? I don't know. I do know that all kinds of guys I know who are on the up and up, NT's with great social skills, strike out with women here - quite literally it seems - because they make too much sense, cocky-funny and Dave DeAngelo tactics galore can't hide that forever which ends up in them charming someone for a minute but then having it all be for naught once they get to know the real 'them'. A lot of my friends as well are successful, do have a lot to offer, and it doesn't seem to mean a thing.

I know I may not get a lot of responses as this thread is coming off one of my cerebral angles, not many identify and I know that, but I am curious to know if anyone (social skills and good hygiene given) had better luck by changing location and moving out of a brain-drain state.

LePetitPrince
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07 Dec 2008, 3:32 pm

Only change regions for a better material life ....not for romance , you can't count the fish while they still in water.

Bataar
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07 Dec 2008, 3:42 pm

Don't come to Seattle then. I've never been anyplace else, but I know people who have moved here from various spots around the country and all complain how much harder it is to meet women here than it is in other places.

techstepgenr8tion
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07 Dec 2008, 4:10 pm

LePetitPrince wrote:

Only change regions for a better material life ....not for romance , you can't count the fish while they still in water.

Well, the better material life, better weather, better jobs, better 'things to do', those are all primary reasons as well. Don't forget though, maybe I'm just old-fashioned, but marriage and children, the family unit, its also pivotal in our lives - some might argue its about our only reason for existence (I'd debate them on it but I still say its vital).

techstepgenr8tion
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07 Dec 2008, 4:12 pm

Bataar wrote:

Is it the same thing as here where when you go to a party, you notice its guys in one room and girls in another? A lot of people who come to my area get hit with that observation and just find it bizarre.

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07 Dec 2008, 4:14 pm

I wonder if you could move to Montreal? According to my ex-boyfriend, Montreal women are gorgeous, intelligent, abundant and sexually aggressive :roll:

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07 Dec 2008, 4:16 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:

Bataar wrote:

Tampa's not like that, not at all (seriously, it's not).

techstepgenr8tion
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07 Dec 2008, 4:23 pm

patternist wrote:

I wonder if you could move to Montreal? According to my ex-boyfriend, Montreal women are gorgeous, intelligent, abundant and sexually aggressive :roll:

Funny thing about that, I have a friend up in Toronto who I've visited a couple times (yes, another WP member) and she's said time and time again that American guys are like Canadian women - Canadian guys are pieces of work and that it seems to be the reciprocal in the U.S.. I really don't know if that's the whole deal, I definitely can see it in the rust-belt.

Overall though I'm just trying to find an area where people are more real, less assuming, where yeah - I'll still be my half-and-half AS/NT mulatto self and be a partial a***hole, just enough to prove that I'm emotionally healthy, but again a place where my best self won't be a deal-breaker.

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07 Dec 2008, 4:25 pm

I would either live in the Pacific Northwest or the NYC/Boston area.

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07 Dec 2008, 4:34 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:

Can't say I recommend Phoenix, but there are worse places (SLC, in my opinion) you could go - but go for yourself, not to appease friends or to seek an unknown love. I'm moving cross-country... for someone I've known for years and love dearly. Think about how you'll respond and what you want from the place you live, and let that help you make up your mind.

M.

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07 Dec 2008, 4:53 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:

Bataar wrote:

I don't know myself, I never go to parties.

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07 Dec 2008, 5:16 pm

makuranososhi wrote:

Yeah, one of us at least will be scoping it out and getting a general opinion of what its worth. That's about the way it stands though, I have a few friends moving out of state, want to myself at some point in my life for the sake of perspective (also not having to ask myself later why I didn't try what would be different if I had), overall if I have some reason that *I* don't want to I'll stay right here. The idea of some unknown love though - I might do better somewhere else, I might have a personality type that won't do better anywhere, there are a million variables that go into it - here at least they seem far more fixed than I like; same people, same crowd, same environments, nothing new. My expectations that it'll miraculously change things are pretty slim, though I do think it could be very healthy for me in other aspects.

Transferring offices I don't think would be that difficult. Still, I realize this is all hypothetical, I'm treating it that way, and probably a thought that's worth entertaining because if its not Phoenix or LA it could just as easily be anywhere in the southeast or southwest.

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07 Dec 2008, 5:19 pm

a change of scene is probably good for you. Make the change to benefit YOU in whatever way you like.

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07 Dec 2008, 5:26 pm

I was offered a job in the L.A. area, but had to turn it down because I still have a year of school to go.

Plus I'm not sure if I would want to live in California anyway.

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techstepgenr8tion
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07 Dec 2008, 5:28 pm

Tim_Tex wrote:

Plus I'm not sure if I would want to live in California anyway.

Not so sure I'd find it that appealing either - the traffic, taxes, and cost of living IMO could easily overshadow the sunshine.

makuranososhi
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07 Dec 2008, 5:42 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:

makuranososhi wrote:

Change isn't a bad thing; I found love on the East coast, despite living on the West my entire life. If you head to Phoenix, let me know and I might be able to suggest some places to visit, people to meet.

M.

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