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Male aspies arousal problem

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Alla
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02 Dec 2008, 9:43 pm

Please help. I've written about this problem in regular forums and people assume that I am a troll or that it can't be possible.

My Aspie love interest has spontaneous orgasms when he sits next to me or across from me. He can have them without me touching him and they usually occur after I tell him something he likes or mention something slightly sexual. They've even occurred without me talking at all. Problem is, it can be embarassing for him because they happen in public (restaurants, etc.) and he has to go to the bathroom to take care of himself. When he returns he seems to be fine.

Can other aspies relate to this sort of thing? What could be causing this?



ToadOfSteel
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02 Dec 2008, 9:54 pm

That's not normal, even for aspies. He should probably get that checked out...



Alla
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02 Dec 2008, 10:08 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:
That's not normal, even for aspies. He should probably get that checked out...


What do you mean by "it's not normal"? Do you believe that this sort of thing is a health problem? It seems more like anxiety related to me.



beef_bourito
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02 Dec 2008, 10:12 pm

i've never heard of that happening. it could be psychological, could be physical, i have no idea but it definitely is not normal. if it's causing him distress then he should have it checked out.



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02 Dec 2008, 10:18 pm

I've never heard of this before either. I have heard of people being able to turn someone on so much mentally that they had an orgasm, but this is through a build-up of intense non-physical sexuality. Is he thinking "sexy" thoughts? It may be some neurological or hormonal problem. This would probably be a psychiatrist or physician's domain of expertise.



ForsakenEagle
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02 Dec 2008, 10:18 pm

Yes, I have never had this happen to me, nor have I heard of it happening to anyone else till now.



Alla
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02 Dec 2008, 10:21 pm

NeantHumain wrote:
I've never heard of this before either. I have heard of people being able to turn someone on so much mentally that they had an orgasm, but this is through a build-up of intense non-physical sexuality. Is he thinking "sexy" thoughts? It may be some neurological or hormonal problem. This would probably be a psychiatrist or physician's domain of expertise.


Yes, he is thinking sexual thoughts and sometimes looks at me from head to toe when this happens. Funny thing is, I used to feel intense anxiety around him when I first realized I liked him a lot. Anxiety to the point of vomiting......so perhaps this is a particular male aspie reaction.



Alla
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02 Dec 2008, 10:24 pm

NeantHumain wrote:
I've never heard of this before either. I have heard of people being able to turn someone on so much mentally that they had an orgasm, but this is through a build-up of intense non-physical sexuality. Is he thinking "sexy" thoughts? It may be some neurological or hormonal problem. This would probably be a psychiatrist or physician's domain of expertise.


He was turning me on mentally at first when I was experiencing the paralyzing anxiety around him. I may well be turning him on mentally as well since we have not had sex. We have kissed though and both of us got incredibly aroused and had to get out fast.



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02 Dec 2008, 10:28 pm

Whoa, that would actually be pretty hot, actually. So long as he wasn't doing it with other girls.
:D



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02 Dec 2008, 10:28 pm

Alla wrote:
NeantHumain wrote:
I've never heard of this before either. I have heard of people being able to turn someone on so much mentally that they had an orgasm, but this is through a build-up of intense non-physical sexuality. Is he thinking "sexy" thoughts? It may be some neurological or hormonal problem. This would probably be a psychiatrist or physician's domain of expertise.


He was turning me on mentally at first when I was experiencing the paralyzing anxiety around him. I may well be turning him on mentally as well since we have not had sex. We have kissed though and both of us got incredibly aroused and had to get out fast.

Far be it from me to say this, but maybe you guys should have sex. It might take the edge off and keep him from making an embarrassment of himself (and you). I'm no medical doctor, though, so I have no clue if this advice is sound.



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02 Dec 2008, 10:29 pm

Alla wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
That's not normal, even for aspies. He should probably get that checked out...


What do you mean by "it's not normal"? Do you believe that this sort of thing is a health problem? It seems more like anxiety related to me.


It probably is a health problem. Apparently spontaneous orgasms can be caused either by certain antidepressants or if a person has had a spinal cord injury in the past...

NeantHumain wrote:
Far be it from me to say this, but maybe you guys should have sex. It might take the edge off and keep him from making an embarrassment of himself (and you). I'm no medical doctor, though, so I have no clue if this advice is sound.


Probably a good idea. You two obviously like each other, so why not take it to the next level?

Although definitely get this issue checked out... it sounds like a medical problem



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02 Dec 2008, 10:48 pm

You said that sometimes it happens completely spontaneously. It could be that his brain is getting too much sensory input from that part of his body.

This phenomenon (spontaneous ejaculation) also occurs sometimes as part of opiate withdrawal. After one's brain has become accustomed to having all sensory neurons numbed by opiates, it temporarily loses its ability to filter/determine the intensity of any input it receives when the drug is discontinued. This can lead to the condition that you mentioned.

It is just an idea. I am not certain that this is what is happening to him, and I certainly don't want to be misconstrued as accusing him of drug use.



Alla
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02 Dec 2008, 10:53 pm

Kaysea wrote:
You said that sometimes it happens completely spontaneously. It could be that his brain is getting too much sensory input from that part of his body.

This phenomenon (spontaneous ejaculation) also occurs sometimes as part of opiate withdrawal. After one's brain has become accustomed to having all sensory neurons numbed by opiates, it temporarily loses its ability to filter/determine the intensity of any input it receives when the drug is discontinued. This can lead to the condition that you mentioned.

It is just an idea. I am not certain that this is what is happening to him, and I certainly don't want to be misconstrued as accusing him of drug use.


That is an interesting idea.

Well, it usually happens when I mention that I like something about him or anything sexual in nature, but it has also happened to him just by looking me over. He will start breathing heavily, his body will shake and have a little spasm for a second or two. After that, he has to go to the bathroom.

I should mention that this man is middle aged and I am half his age (but have no problem about it!)



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02 Dec 2008, 11:05 pm

Alla wrote:
Kaysea wrote:
You said that sometimes it happens completely spontaneously. It could be that his brain is getting too much sensory input from that part of his body.

This phenomenon (spontaneous ejaculation) also occurs sometimes as part of opiate withdrawal. After one's brain has become accustomed to having all sensory neurons numbed by opiates, it temporarily loses its ability to filter/determine the intensity of any input it receives when the drug is discontinued. This can lead to the condition that you mentioned.

It is just an idea. I am not certain that this is what is happening to him, and I certainly don't want to be misconstrued as accusing him of drug use.


That is an interesting idea.

Well, it usually happens when I mention that I like something about him or anything sexual in nature, but it has also happened to him just by looking me over. He will start breathing heavily, his body will shake and have a little spasm for a second or two. After that, he has to go to the bathroom.

I should mention that this man is middle aged and I am half his age (but have no problem about it!)


This would indicate that it is, at least, partially psychological in origin. It may be plausible that it is a combination of both - he becomes moderately arroused (psychologically) and, when combined with the stimulation of his clothing touching his genital region, that it results in ejaculation.



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03 Dec 2008, 12:22 am

Post removed because you're both much older than i thought you were. Just have safe sex.



Samara
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03 Dec 2008, 12:36 am

I have the same experiences except I am female. Though not as much as your boyfriend. I have to be careful not act impulsively when it comes to sex. There is nothing wrong with me. I had a bf who had the same problem. It usually happens to people with high sex drive.