Was this girl really interested in me?

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Hello! I'm an eighteen year old aspie and new to this thread.

I am hoping to study psychology in a few months at university, and I went on a day trip to the university I want to go to to take a look around, and get a feeling of the place. It was a special day because all the universities in the country had sent representitives to this university, as a way of promoting their own courses, and therefore, there were loads of A Level students looking for advice. A nice looking, dark haired girl approached me towards the end of the day, as I was standing alone by the Electronics building, and started to chat, asking me what subjects I was studying. I replied and tried to make conversation by asking her what she was studying. She then said to me "I know this is embarrassing, but can I have your number?" I was immediately suspicious because, for years I have considered myself an unattractive geek who will certainly not get girls based on looks (I wear glasses, wollen jumpers over collared shirts, jeans and I don't gell my hair). I peered at her over my glasses and replied "I don't give out my number to strangers", at which point her friend came over as well. The girl asked me ''Not even sexy ones?'' to which I replied ''No.'' They then said "Bye sexy" and walked off. I returned home confused , unsure as to whether these girls were making fun of me or whether they really liked me. When I told my mother, she ranted at me for about two hours, telling me how hard it is for girls to ask boys out, and grumbling that I'm "throwing my chances away" and that I could "have had a nice date." Since then, other people have suggested that the girls were teasing me, and that I did the right thing. I don't know what to think, and have no idea what to do in similar situations. What do you all think?

It's a 'teachable moment'...

she was giving you an opportunity. You played 'hard to get' for a few seconds, but then she saw you might not have been interested. Many women will initiate something small, and it develops on how you respond. If you respond 'correctly', it can turn into flirting. Or something else.

It's a situational thing.

You should've gone for it.

don't stress about it. she could have had HIV...

If it's any consolation, my mother was the same way. She always read too much into things (I thought only GUYS did that!) and said that girls were flirting with me. She even used to tell me that I'd be so attractive I would "make women faint with one look"... HA!

Anyway, due to obsolete gender roles, I think that most women expect guys to approach them not the other way around, so it's safe to assume these girls were just kidding around.

Why not give 'em a consolation throw-away email address next time instead of a phone number? If they're making fun of you, then that's all there is to it, but at least w/ an email addy she could still contact you if she was serious, and it wouldn't be as bad as a telephone number in the hands of someone mischievous, for instance someone who would write "For a good time call Brenda at $George's_phone_number!"

FWIW, I've had ladies and gentlemen give me their numbers, and I've always thought I was unattractive, so you may not be as unattractive as you think you are, and as usual everyone's tastes vary widely.

Edit- I can't believe I forgot a "not".

Last edited by yesplease on 11 Apr 2009, 6:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

i think she was genuinely interested in you, maybe you should have given her your number.

I suppose that's a good idea. I'll do that next time. I suppose then, if girls are genuine, I can give them my number once I trust them. Has anyone got any ideas on why the girl's friend came running up suddenly? I found that quite off putting. Was it for support?

Is it possible she was alone and simply wanted to be with her friend again, after allowing you some "alone time" to get your number?

I know very well what you feel in this case. It's hard to trust people in matters like this if you've been screwed over before. "If something sounds too good to be true, it probably isn't!"

Dude, she sounds like an egomaniac if she said THAT. You wouldn't wanna date someone like that anyway.

You did what I would had done. They were teasing you, girls don't act like that when they like you.

Jesus Christ. You guys are so f*****g depressing sometimes I want to go and slit my wrist.

EVERYONE IS OUT TO GET ME NO-ONE EVER LIKES ME STRANGERS ARE NOT TO BE TRUSTED WE ARE BETTER THAN EVERYONE.

"Depressing"? Where did that come from?! You're the one who implied that the OP was "missing out" on something. We're pointing out the positive in his decision, which was probably the right thing to do anyway, since giving away personal information (like your phone number) to total strangers, "sexy" or otherwise, can be dangerous.

Either she thinks its cool to have nerd friends so they make their homework.
Or she was new to university just like you and is trying to make as many friends as she can.
It was a bet-prank.
Or she genuinly like you.

EITHER WAY.

You had chances to get closer to that girl, even if the purpose was to mock you, you could have showed yourself better later, and could have had a date with her.

It doesnt matter now, don't worry.


I remember when this girl comes so sweetly and asks me if I wanted another chocolate, my reply was...

"no"

She gave me this uncomforatable sigh.

That is untrue... I am not better than anyone at anything... except for photoshopping stuff...

I asked my friend and he said that she was probably their for support. Anyone, male or female, who is new to asking anyone else for their number is likely a bit nervous at least, and since her friend came up after you made a statement that could've been perceived as brush off, she was probably just trying to support her friend.

As for whether or not they were making fun of you, at the very least, asking someone for their number is a very odd way to make fun of someone, at not at all common in my friend's experience or in mine, so while it's a possibility, I don't think it's likely. The closest thing my friend could think of is if you had asked someone for their number or given you "their" number, and they had given you a rejection hotline number or similar.