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Padium
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12 Jun 2009, 9:58 pm

There is this guy in my English literature class I like. He is a friend of mine, and we tend to hang out a lot after class. He is absolutely amazing, he's got a great personality, he's smart, good looking, and every time I'm around him I find I like him more. Anyways, I'd like to say something about it to him, but I don't know if it is the best idea to do so in my present situation. He knows I am transexualand accepts it, but I don't know hpw he would take me liking him in such a way...



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Snowy Owl
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12 Jun 2009, 10:20 pm

I suspect love does not always need saying. It sometimes helps to express love by saying "I fancy you", but in most cases, it's only to confirm the trend of mutual looks, smiles, support and happiness-in-proximity. As long as nothing DaysOfOurLives happens*Shudder*, I suggest you let things run their course. If you spiral toward one-another, wordless, he has the freedom to take a step back, or the freedom to, without having to, to step closer.

And, FYI, love is a flexible thing. As is sexuality, if we're going there. Go watch torchwood*Rolleyes*

If it's meant to be, it's gonna be okay.

If not....well really, what are you able to do about it? Not-loving someone is the most impossible thing any human has ever suggested.


I wish you much happy, and lots-o-love.



willa
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12 Jun 2009, 10:53 pm

Is he gay? straight? dont know?
i've always found it kinda fascinating, the idea of someone who is gay falling in love with a straight person. The personal conundrum that creates.
Like it kinda makes me feel bad. I understand rejection, but to me it feels like that would be a whole other set of issues, to have feelings for someone who will never have them for you for that reason.
Sounds kind of stupid coming out of my head and maybe doesnt make sense. Like if I were to ask a women out and she turned me down, I would just explain it in my head as 'well, she's looking for better' or 'maybe one day' or 'she'll regret it' or something silly like that.
But the idea that the answer was no due to them having no romantic feelings, and not being capable of it, to be really depressing.

I think if a gay guy sincerely confessed his love and devotion to me, I would feel bad enough to say 'hey, why not one night? gotta be a first time for everything' :o
But then probably not, because I wouldnt want to do something that could give false hope. But then again also lol, who knows? =P. Why limit the possibilities of finding a soul mate to just half the population, double it by going bi! :P

Just thinking out loud there, sorry :P

I say why not tell him. If he is a good friend he wouldnt let it bother him and hopefully it'll be found as flattering. And maybe he is interested in you romantically. Or maybe he finds it disgusting and you find out he's not all he cracked up to be, sooner raither than later. But you'll never know till you ask.


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sunshower
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12 Jun 2009, 10:59 pm

I think tell him too. If he's a tolerant person, then you probably won't lose your friendship, but you could potentially gain a partner. But wait a while first and try to enhance the closeness/connection (don't jump in too prematurely). Good luck Padium. :D


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Padium
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12 Jun 2009, 11:26 pm

I know he is accepting of transexuality, as we were talking prior to me coming out to him about it, and we actually were discussing the situation of one of his trans friends. The last time we hung out was thursday and we literally spent the rest of the day together after class. 12 hours worth.



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Snowy Owl
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12 Jun 2009, 11:54 pm

Yeap, so you're either truly awesome friends or he's got a crush on you as well. I would not spend 12 hrs with someone I did not truly enjoy spending time with. For the other observers and lurkers in this forum: What did you..liek..DO exactly? I mean TALKING all through that 12 hrs would be..yeah, that'd be love. No doubt. But if you were playing Halo, that's a whole different ballgame...FPS...No love. Just buddies.



Padium
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13 Jun 2009, 12:05 am

We talked, got bubble tea, and fired the tapioca through the straws at random things in a park, talked some more, etc.



Kenjuudo
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13 Jun 2009, 12:13 am

I'd say tell him now and get it over with. It may get worse later on. Especially when the "bonds" are more tightly knit.


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