AS Boyfriend and Girlfriend Reconaissance Field Manual

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Learning2Survive
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07 May 2009, 7:24 pm

How to find a boyfriend or girlfriend who will make you happy, won't be abusive, and will last.

1. dress and groom clean and neat
2. get to know them as a superficial friend
3. keep flirting/showing romantic interest from the start, but don't cross the line
4. become good friends
5. put effort into being a good friend, but ultimately you are looking for someone for whom you do not have to change
6. be honest (don't lie or pretend) from the start - a partnership based on lying cannot succeed.
7. be honest and open and say "I liked when you said "Shannon, you have beautiful eyes." or "Mike, I love you and I am going to treat you like a man."
8. if you don't like how the person is kissing/touching, teach them to do it differently, how you like, but teach them slowly and step by step, like a new dance.

p.s. giving each other compliments and flirting from the start should prevent you from friend zoning


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sunshower
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07 May 2009, 8:05 pm

Love the title (it's great :)) and I agree with the steps, I think this is a good summary.

Except with number 6; definitely be honest from the start, I do agree with that, and always be yourself, just don't ever say straight out that you are looking to be in a relationship with them. Then you pretty much close all other doors, and the other person can feel trapped and pressured. Keep your mind open to all options, let things progress naturally, and decide that later.


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Fudo
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07 May 2009, 8:48 pm

good tips.. now to try them out. :)
anyone want to be superficial friends? :p



Bataar
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07 May 2009, 9:19 pm

Learning2Survive wrote:
How to find a boyfriend or girlfriend who will make you happy, won't be abusive, and will last.

1. dress and groom clean and neat
2. get to know them as a superficial friend
3. keep flirting/showing romantic interest from the start, but don't cross the line
4. become good friends
5. put effort into being a good friend, but ultimately you are looking for someone for whom you do not have to change
6. be honest (don't lie or pretend) from the start - a partnership based on lying cannot succeed.
7. be honest and open and say "I liked when you said "Shannon, you have beautiful eyes." or "Mike, I love you and I am going to treat you like a man."
8. if you don't like how the person is kissing/touching, teach them to do it differently, how you like, but teach them slowly and step by step, like a new dance.

p.s. giving each other compliments and flirting from the start should prevent you from friend zoning

So how do you find one?

Step 1 is pretty straight forward and it's something I do already. Step 2 already assumes you've found someone.



Fudo
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07 May 2009, 9:34 pm

yes, if we could pinpoint the location of single & available lady folk.. then step 2 is possible.



lotusblossom
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08 May 2009, 3:18 am

Learning2Survive wrote:
How to find a boyfriend or girlfriend who will make you happy, won't be abusive, and will last.

1. dress and groom clean and neat
2. get to know them as a superficial friend
3. keep flirting/showing romantic interest from the start, but don't cross the line
4. become good friends
5. put effort into being a good friend, but ultimately you are looking for someone for whom you do not have to change
6. be honest (don't lie or pretend) from the start - a partnership based on lying cannot succeed.
7. be honest and open and say "I liked when you said "Shannon, you have beautiful eyes." or "Mike, I love you and I am going to treat you like a man."
8. if you don't like how the person is kissing/touching, teach them to do it differently, how you like, but teach them slowly and step by step, like a new dance.

p.s. giving each other compliments and flirting from the start should prevent you from friend zoning


fantastic L2S :D

that is just the best advice ever!

Fudo wrote:
yes, if we could pinpoint the location of single & available lady folk.. then step 2 is possible.


pm women who you like the posts of, its that easy!



MDD123
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08 May 2009, 3:27 am

Y'know guys, there are lots of available women out there, why don't you give wrongplanet a break and find a volunteer group or some dance lessons?



Fudo
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08 May 2009, 7:51 am

ahh now i have to work on step one :(



lotusblossom
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08 May 2009, 8:02 am

Fudo wrote:
ahh now i have to work on step one :(


na, save that till you meet up with them :wink:



Fudo
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08 May 2009, 8:08 am

lotusblossom wrote:
Fudo wrote:
ahh now i have to work on step one :(


na, save that till you meet up with them :wink:
hehe good idea thanks :)



Learning2Survive
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08 May 2009, 9:00 am

most people meet their gf or bf at a party or when through friends. is this true?


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desmonami
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08 May 2009, 9:16 am

Can i use this thread to ask why it seems some of you are so obsessed with wanting to be in relationships and be "loved"?

Did i miss the part of the memo where it states that being in a relationship is suddenly going to cause me instant happiness and gratification? Are you lives that empty and tragic that it requires for someone else to bring happiness to it? Or is it just the sex with you people?



Xanderbeanz
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08 May 2009, 9:24 am

it's the fact that society brings us up to feel like "losers" if we don't have a special someone. also, people hate loners, they all apparently turn into serial killers, so there's stigma there...and people will want what everyone else has...

tbh, lots of my relationships in the past have been slightly abusive, but when i finally found the girl i'm in love with, it is like instant happiness.x



Learning2Survive
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08 May 2009, 9:25 am

i obsess about being single because i tend to finger point self blame at things i don't have to make myself feel bad for no logical reason. i might not even enjoy a gf, but still i cannot help but feel that i am missing out on something. in fact, our attractiveness and sex drive decline as we age. it bugs me that women give themselves to heroin addicts and horrible abusive guys, but they won't look at us aspies twice.


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lotusblossom
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08 May 2009, 9:42 am

desmonami wrote:
Can i use this thread to ask why it seems some of you are so obsessed with wanting to be in relationships and be "loved"?

Did i miss the part of the memo where it states that being in a relationship is suddenly going to cause me instant happiness and gratification? Are you lives that empty and tragic that it requires for someone else to bring happiness to it? Or is it just the sex with you people?


I think sex is a very valid reason to want a relationship, aparently its very good for you and makes you live longer and its fab!



desmonami
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08 May 2009, 9:46 am

^^ Well sex is definitely a good reason an any! :) I was just curious i guess. I remember when i used to be in the phase of wanting a boyfriend :lol: Then i got one and it was almost anti climatic... :D

Thanks for the insight btw, beanz and survive!