confusing phenomenon

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I've recently noticed something about my life that I find very puzzling and it's causing me some stress. I know that a lot of people have that situation where they like two people and have to choose between them, but for me this seems to happen all the time. It seems like every time I start talking to someone and we sort of get on well, but before it becomes anything more, someone else shows up and I'll really like them as well. Most of the time I don't get much attention at all from guys, but if I ever do it they come in groups.

I'm not sure if I'm expecting anyone to be able to give me much advice, but I am hoping that maybe someone else can relate. I just get very confused by it. it this were to happen further along a relationship it wouldn't be a problem and I'd just ignore it. I don't know if maybe I'm fickle, but I'm having trouble with it. It just seems to happen every time I meet someone.

I haven't had this happen often, but it has happened before. Out of respect, I'd try to stick to whoever I met first, if only by a day or two. In other circumstances, it ends up that the one you met last is the one thats more compatible, so I'd lean more in that direction while slowly drifting from the first. But for me, they never worked out anyway, so it wasn't much of an issue. I'm just trying to help out a little.


Use your heart. Whichever one you feel more connected to, that's the one you should concentrate on. Don't risk losing a soulmate, by thinking you are obligated to someone else.

Many years there was a Seinfeld episode that presented this issue. Propose a menage a trois. I'm not sure how that will improve things, but it could be interesting.

Ahhh! You lucky ducky!! Why can't you just have 'em all?! The key to doing this is celebacy and complete honesty. "Really" get to know each one of them. They and you won't die without sex. Besides sex (in my opinion) cheapens the relationship and society overates sex very much because they got confused by somebody's brilliant idea to make money from it. Just like when some jerk says granola is good for you and you get convinced by ads, radio and the whole blasted media cramming it down your gob. Tell them there are others in your life and that you're just getting to know "people of the opposite sex" a bit better. If they can't handle that, then so be it. The only way to find out what you want in a permanent mate is to first find out what you don't want by getting to know the temporary ones. I wish I could be 19 again and follow my own advice. Everything for me happened too fast and ended even faster leaving me beaten and devastated. A lot of relationships I had could have enriched my life if I kept them as friendships instead of relationships. They were great fun...in the beginning but the male/female pressure ruined them completely...the expectation of more destroyed them. I could have found solid relationships in some of the people these guys knew. But I could not act upon it because I was "unhappily" committed to them. When you're about 24 or 25, maybe then you can have an exclusive relationship but guys under 30 can be fickle jerks. Better to befriend the young ones. You may just meet some mature candidates "through" them. That how the NT's network. Think about it. Even a lowly bug puts their feelers out first as opposed to putting their ass out first...like I did.

Then you witnessed a rare moment. Jawbrodt isn't usually the sentimental type.

edit: typo

Always remember this: You may feel like "King of the Hill" or "Queen of the Hill" because you may have several suitors BUT those suitors may have other romantic interests as well. When I was young, I became all "empuffed" and proud because I had four suitors BUT what I didn't know was one was married, one saw "many" other people, one was bi-sexual, and the other was possessive in a sick way. None were suitable! I did not have sex with any of them...thank goodness for that! I needed time to weed out the truth about all of them. When I did, all of them HAD TO GO. The only way to get to know a person is to pass the time with them. Show them off to others and eventually their truths come out. It's a big, big world with a lot of people in it. I didn't marry until I was past 30 because of all the tall, weedy creeps I had to walk through. But I can spot a creep from 10 miles away. So, one does learn the hard way. Now that I'm old, I've become an oracle for people who are dating. The bottom line: KEEP YOUR LEGS SHUT! Remember my four suitors...if i had sex with them, I could've gotton aids or an STD, or murdered, or had a kid out of wedlock with a married man...now, that's horrible!
But I walked around like I s**t ice cream....perilously popular. Now, if a gal has four suitors who are excellent human beings, that's something to strut around and be proud about. But that's not reality. That's television.