Writing people off, with no hope of forgiveness

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The only people I forgive are people I need in a way, such as my mother or my teacher.
Although I have never really forgiven these people, it would not be convenient for me to write them off.
The only person I have written off is my sister.

Mind-gamers, and passive-aggressive manipulative lying b*tches (gender irrelevant) never get a second chance with me.

I do not know if it is right or wrong, but I have stopped communicating with people I become finished with. I get like that with people sometimes... when I am done, I am done... nothing they can say or do will ever get me back if I hit that point. Granted, it takes a lot for me to get there with people. I mess up a lot and hope for tolerance and understanding, so I try to give that to people in return... but sometimes the best way to deal with people is to never deal with them again. Sometimes it simplifies life, and that is a beautiful thing. My husband is disturbed by my ability to do that with people. I figure if they are causing me enough distress to want to be done with them, then why should it bother me to be done with them. I cannot say that I regret the ties I have severed. My only regrets in a few of those situations would be not ending the associations sooner. It would have decreased the stress levels in my life at the time...

I have a hard time forgetting as well... I can usually forgive, but it is so hard to forget. I have trust issues and once someone messes that up with me, the relationship is never the same. I do not know how to get over those kinds of things. I wish I did. There are people I will not sever ties with who have made me distrustful... that kind of situation is what really makes me nuts. Letting go of people is easy... dealing with the ones you want around is not.

The list of people I've written off is longer than the list of contacts in my phone. Including my mother, to whom I haven't spoken for over a year, and never will unless she apologizes. She did something that I think is unforgiveable and she didn't apologize. I think she's on the spectrum as well, so maybe that explains her inability to apologize.

Now if someone apologizes, I'll forgive immediately.

I think this is one of those "black and white thinking" areas.

Add that to social issues, and yeah, I can see how many of us would have a hard time forgiving someone who has hurt us.

I'm pretty much the same, a one-off is one thing, but when there's a pattern... For me it's not so much a question of forgiving but that is I decide that someone's not worth the trouble, then they're not worth the trouble and that's it. I must say I find it easy to write people off, there's maybe one person I regret not giving a second chance, but in every other instance, my only regret is not doing it sooner.

I gradually wrote off a friend/roommate a little while ago, culminating in moving out and deciding never to have anything to do with them again. We just matured in very different directions. Leaving it at that is where we delineate an explanation from ragging.

I think everyone has a limit where an action is beyond apology. I know there are a few things people have done to me that I would never forgive them for. I know neurotypical people who also do this.

Well, if someone killed me, or gave me a severe enough brain damage, I might really never be able to accept an apology.

I've written off my brother off. He practically does not exist anymore.

I'm considering cutting ties with my mother as well. Phone calls with her are not pleasant. Nothing is pleasant when interacting with her. There is no use having to deal with an unpleasant person, just because of familial ties. A person is a person. An unpleasant person is a person I do not want to have in my life.

Thank you, each and every one of you, for all your replies. You've all articulated your thoughts well, and given me validation and support!

I am not the most forgiving person in the universe, but if I think that someone is genuinely sorry for what they've done then I'll do my best to put the past behind me and give them another chance.

There are some people who I will never forgive. People who have played mind games, people who have used me, and someone who I thought was my friend but was more than happy to throw everything back in my face. Things which I told her because I thought she would understand. Some people might consider these things to be relatively minor, but to me what these people have done is unforgivable.

I forgive because I do not like to live with resentment........

But if it is unhealthy, dangerous or just plain "not happening" I walk away and hope that I maintained my dignity and honour.

After all, I am the one who has to live with my decisions.

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