saying 'hello'

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I love this topic since it is one of my biggest sources of anxiety at work. I'm usually pretty relieved when I don't have to walk past anyone down the "long hallway".

Someone mentioned making brief eye contact about halfway through to gauge whether a "hello" is appropriate. This seems to work for me, too. However, I usually do not say anything if it is somebody I don't already know or have not been introduced to previously. My one exception is that I will always say good morning if it is early enough (just seems appropriate).

I have some experience as I have made a friend at my school. I just normally say hello back when he shows up, but if we walk past I wave or pay attention in some way, occasionally saying hello. He doesn't complain and he's an NT. I've probably overcome my Aspergers enough for my symptoms to be a little unnoticeable to him, but that's not the point.

I do think it depends on situation and time, best to say hello back if they say it to you, or wave or pay attention in some way back to them. If you notice them but they ignore you or don't see you then you can say hello or grab their attention to greet them. Make sure you are friendly or at least not awkward when you say the hello's as well. Good luck to anyone reading this, this is only my opinion and advice, so take it with a grain of salt, but I hope it does help.

It's still hard for me as well to say hello, but it gets easier.

Last edited by Outrider on 21 Feb 2014, 7:30 am, edited 1 time in total.

A lot of times NTs won't say when something is bothering them, though, and the corollary, they assume that you're really mad and mean when you do say that you're bothered by something, even if you're only very mildly annoyed.

Hmm, good point. But I can already tell this particular NT is fine with how I am, just like I am fine with how he is.

And when you explain something mildly annoying best to be clear enough and not come on too strongly or emotional. "This makes me uncomfortable when you do that, I do not like it. I'd prefer it if you'd stop please." calmly.

With the "bothering" thing, it's best to try and pick up any uncomfortableness if you can and ask what the problem is and how you can help. Sorry I couldn't help any further.