Limiting interaction time to maintain freinds longer?

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...Or an aspie like me that has issues with noise. I have a longtime friend whom I suspect is at least a little aspie. I have also told her to lower her volume at times, good naturedly. And we are still wonderful friends. Even though we don't see each other often--every few months or so--we always pick up where we left off. She is just loud at times--i think with a naturally loud voice. My voice is naturally quiet and i have sound sensitivities. But it is a compromise--she turns it down if i am overwhelmed; I try to be kind and remember that she truly isn't trying to offend me by being loud.

In my situation, it was not noise-related, but intensity-related (though I can be quite loud sometimes.) I am an extremely intense person who thinks all the time and likes to share what I'm thinking about. My husband often tells me that I am picking the wrong time to talk about something or that I'm going on too long about something. Not that he won't ever listen, but he needs me to wait until a better time. Talking about Schoenberg's Theory of Harmony at 7AM before he's had a cup of coffee, for example, is NOT the right time... He is very patient with me.

Anyway, not sure this friend (or my husband) is really NT. Most people don't bother to tell me to "tone it down." Most people just walk away from a friendship and I never really know why. I know that I am really intense, but I can't keep that under wraps forever.

Some feedback always helps to know when certain individuals can take it or not. Everyone has a different threshold. It is just nice to hear things like "can we talk about this later?" or "this email was too long - I didn't read it" or "I'm in a bad mood right now and can't listen". Etc. They are not saying that I am a bad person for being intense, but are gently letting me know I am not grasping the social setting just right and need to make some adjustments.

I became conscious of this fairly young, I've tried but it hasn't stopped the inevitable

now that social capital is extinguished, really only get one shot at it

Sometimes "limiting interaction" works well; sometimes, it really doesn't.

In my relationship with my mother, "limiting interaction" has the desired effect.

Sometimes, in some romantic relationships, absence could very well "make the heart grow fonder."