Celifrog
Tufted Titmouse
Joined: 10 Dec 2017
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 38
Location: East Texas, United States
10 Dec 2017, 7:42 am
Yeah it sucks only having acquaintances, I only have those right now and no friends. I only have a few online acquaintances. Hope you end up having a friend sometime.
10 Dec 2017, 6:18 pm
Khiori wrote:
This. This right here. Nothing comes close to the pain of having this happen.
This happened to me recently at a job that I managed to hold onto for almost a year. I thought we were becoming pretty good friends, I even asked if we were friends and she said yes. I was thrilled she was being so nice to me, but after I was fired I never heard from her again, even though I left her my number.
[/quote]It sounds like she said something because it felt good at the time along with being polite.
I have friends at my place of worship but they have not been able to come for a while because they were the only ones who invite me because the husband has Asperger's too.
The other people there acknowledge me but seem to connect with everyone else and talk about their plans right in front of me like I am invisible.
10 Dec 2017, 6:46 pm
10 Dec 2017, 9:36 pm
10 Dec 2017, 11:18 pm
11 Dec 2017, 8:03 am
11 Dec 2017, 9:41 am
14 Dec 2017, 3:56 am
14 Dec 2017, 12:00 pm
14 Dec 2017, 12:09 pm
16 Dec 2017, 1:07 am
16 Dec 2017, 9:19 pm
ladyelaine wrote:
Summer_Twilight wrote:
ladyelaine wrote:
Summer_Twilight, people never include me in their plans either. It's very awkward watching everyone around me making plans with each other and never want to involve me. I have tried to make plans with people, but they go on and on about how "busy" they are.
I have found that the most trouble seems to come from places of worship for me. I just left another congregation where two elders had teens and adults on the spectrum too. Yet, neither parent had the courtesy to help make me feel welcome. Rather, they either spent their time in their little cliques. I was always left out of details out of important parties too.
One time, I went to a women's fellowship a few years back at one of their homes. Her adult son came to greet me and asked if I was going to this surprise party for the husband of the other woman who was a mother of a teen with autism. Being that I didn't receive anything, I was disappointed. Later during a discussion about it, I jokingly said, "I don't know anything about what goes on. I am usually out of the loop." That woman lied "You were always invited and but every time I kept trying to give you an invitation, my husband would follow me around. However, you must be lonely and if you feel that way you need to reach out."
Jesus commands people to love one another as he has loved us. Christians are the worst offenders when it comes to this. Some of the nastiest people I have ever met were people from the churches that I have attended.
I have never had a positive experience with NT parents of autistic people. The parents are snobs and don't really want their children around me or my siblings. They want their children around people of high social status. Their children would much rather hang out with me and my siblings. The parents keep wishing their autistic children could be normal and they never accept their children as they are. Some parents will treat their kids like they can't do anything and they baby them. Their kids could do more if their parents believed in them. Some parents don't even bother to teach their kids social skills. They think their kids can't learn social skills. My parents made sure my sister and I learned social skills. My mom thought I would be a good friend/ mentor for a couple of autistic girls that she knew. One was a student in the classes my mom volunteered in and the other girl was the daughter of the behavior tech in the EDB unit. Neither of the girls' mothers were interested in introducing their daughters to me.
I recently have been connecting with a set of parents of a son with severe autism who uses a letter board but see him as someone who can and is very smart. In fact, I am looking to invite them to dinner pretty soon.
Historygal is pretty spot on about NTs not wanting to be called on their crap. They love to turn it around on us and make it look like its our fault. God forbid should NTs own up to their crap.
I left that congregation nearly three years ago because it wasn't a good fit and found a better one though I still get left out along with there being a mean lady who I put in her place last month. Anyway, there are some nice people who I acquainted with who saw me get mistreated there. She finally stood up to the person who pulled the party stunt on me. Like you said, she threw it in her face by making me sound like a troublemaker by gossiping about me and accusing me of things that I didn't do.
16 Dec 2017, 10:36 pm
Summer_Twilight wrote:
ladyelaine wrote:
Summer_Twilight wrote:
ladyelaine wrote:
Summer_Twilight, people never include me in their plans either. It's very awkward watching everyone around me making plans with each other and never want to involve me. I have tried to make plans with people, but they go on and on about how "busy" they are.
I have found that the most trouble seems to come from places of worship for me. I just left another congregation where two elders had teens and adults on the spectrum too. Yet, neither parent had the courtesy to help make me feel welcome. Rather, they either spent their time in their little cliques. I was always left out of details out of important parties too.
One time, I went to a women's fellowship a few years back at one of their homes. Her adult son came to greet me and asked if I was going to this surprise party for the husband of the other woman who was a mother of a teen with autism. Being that I didn't receive anything, I was disappointed. Later during a discussion about it, I jokingly said, "I don't know anything about what goes on. I am usually out of the loop." That woman lied "You were always invited and but every time I kept trying to give you an invitation, my husband would follow me around. However, you must be lonely and if you feel that way you need to reach out."
Jesus commands people to love one another as he has loved us. Christians are the worst offenders when it comes to this. Some of the nastiest people I have ever met were people from the churches that I have attended.
I have never had a positive experience with NT parents of autistic people. The parents are snobs and don't really want their children around me or my siblings. They want their children around people of high social status. Their children would much rather hang out with me and my siblings. The parents keep wishing their autistic children could be normal and they never accept their children as they are. Some parents will treat their kids like they can't do anything and they baby them. Their kids could do more if their parents believed in them. Some parents don't even bother to teach their kids social skills. They think their kids can't learn social skills. My parents made sure my sister and I learned social skills. My mom thought I would be a good friend/ mentor for a couple of autistic girls that she knew. One was a student in the classes my mom volunteered in and the other girl was the daughter of the behavior tech in the EDB unit. Neither of the girls' mothers were interested in introducing their daughters to me.
I recently have been connecting with a set of parents of a son with severe autism who uses a letter board but see him as someone who can and is very smart. In fact, I am looking to invite them to dinner pretty soon.
Historygal is pretty spot on about NTs not wanting to be called on their crap. They love to turn it around on us and make it look like its our fault. God forbid should NTs own up to their crap.
I left that congregation nearly three years ago because it wasn't a good fit and found a better one though I still get left out along with there being a mean lady who I put in her place last month. Anyway, there are some nice people who I acquainted with who saw me get mistreated there. She finally stood up to the person who pulled the party stunt on me. Like you said, she threw it in her face by making me sound like a troublemaker by gossiping about me and accusing me of things that I didn't do.
It's unfortunate that that woman had to treat you that way. She deserved to be called on her crap. People have spread rumors about me and tried to turn other people against me too. NT's love to do that to get everyone on their side and make us the bad guys.
17 Dec 2017, 9:33 am
17 Dec 2017, 10:57 am
Ladyelaine, I don't know about that because I have had my share of others who are on the spectrum in addition to people with other disabilities spread act just as bad. I also have a friend who I met at an Asperger's support group who was bullied by other Aspies because he had qualities who made them feel insecure.
Examples:
Just about every time I would go to that group, they made him out to be this person who
1. Had a bad temper and caused others to leave
2. He's a troublemaker who would stir things up
3. He blew up at the support group leader and used "Naughty words"
I have spent time with my friend and none of what they said is true about him
I have also had people with Autism and other disabilities work to turn others against me too so it's not just NTs.
17 Dec 2017, 4:22 pm
