NT with new Aspie acquaintance/friend wants to know....

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And Lab Pet is lousy with emoticons....sigh.

I think he'll love the Flat Earth chips - Aspies tend to have a quirky sense of humor!
Good luck in your algebra 2 class. If you need assistance Wrong Planet has a math/science forum, which can be our forte.
Just don't ask us about what's fashionable or emotive topics.....we're lost!

Hi Ptown,

It is a possibility (I'm not saying it's a fact!) that your Aspie friend is very frightened of losing you as a friend. At least I would be frightened of losing you as a friend for sure

Not or hardly saying sorry after the door incident might seem weird in that respect, but he may have been shocked by his own behaviour, thus frightened of consequences (you mad at him = possibly end of friendship), thus not able or not daring to speak.

Similar thing with the "you win" conversation, he may have suspected wrongly that an argument was starting between the two of you and an argument is really something he wants to avoid.

If I'm right, best thing (which works fine for me) is to discuss incidents frankly with him but at the same time reassure that you stay friends.

thanks Marco67,
i can't imagine he could ever lose me as a friend no matter how jerk-ish he can be. not that i would take direct abuse but i can easily forgive obliviousness or clumsy interactions. i did hear him say "stupid" while he was trying to teach me to play chess. i called him on it right away- he denied mocking me and said i misheard him or misunderstood- but then he spent the rest of the afternoon calling me "smart person." he said he was bummed he was going to be alone on valentine's day. i told him he is perfectly capable of having a girlfriend. he said all my girlfriend's names end with "dot jpeg." he's brilliantly funny and i know it's really hard for him to be open and trust and i am just trying to navigate new territory without blowing it myself. i honestly have no idea how to read him. he runs hot and cold. the other day, he wanted to shake hands with me and he wouldn't let go for a noticeable amount of time... then he walks out of a room and doesn't even say BYE so i just have to keep an open mind and take nothing personally. i know he's learning to have a real friend for the 1st time... he has family he is close to but he is often hurt. i want to be a person who doesn't cause him any pain or any harm. that's really tough, though, when one is trying to be real.

LabPet- he wouldn't go near the Flat Earth chips. I guess he's stuck on Cheetos....LOL. i gave them to a group of eager kids.

The latter makes perfect sense! And it's good you said something about it in the first place!



Wow, that's very nice of him!



Something may have happened before, e.g. you may have said something that he took completely differently than you intended and it upset him. I don't know, I'm just guessing. Anyway, you're right you need to have a lot of patience and undoubtedly you will run out of patience at some times (unless you're a saint). In those instances, please return here to tell how it's going and don't give up!