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That is the problem I have with making friends. I would love to have a close friend, but when I think about all that is involved with being friends, it freaks me out. I inadvertantly push people away and then wonder what happened. I dont even know or understand what I do that causes people all of a sudden stop being my friend.
OMG yes that's how I feel too.
I actually had several close friends and lots of other friends in my previous course at Uni, but when I switched to Medicine, it became really hard for me to maintain contact with everyone. I'm gradually losing contact with them, and I don't feel like making close friends in Medicine anymore even though it makes me look like the "black sheep/loner" within the year level, because I know I'll have a very hard time maintaining contact with them after my Pre-Clinical years finish too.
Also coz I don't have much in common with them anyway, so it's frustrating for someone like me with no sense of NT/banter humour to converse with them about common topics unless it's about trivial things. I HATE banter, I don't understand how it's funny so I don't laugh, and I rarely go down to that level. Tbh I find small talk frustrating because few people are willing to be straight serious right from the start, but I can manage it sometimes usually by asking questions and making comments about what they do (*pretending that you're interested in something which you're ignorant/not interested about*). If they don't want to answer my "smalltalk" questions/comments, then I get pissed off because they don't know how much effort us people put into making conversation with them.
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sevysgrl , you've probably heard this before, but you are your "best friend". You know yourself better than the other people at school or Uni. If you have difficulty maintaining contact with people, maybe you could search for 1 person who you have lots in common with, but isn't clingy if you know what I mean. Perhaps through a club or a specific activity group. You meet once or twice a week and communicate, and you have stuff to talk about each time you see each other. So over time, that friend can be considered close I guess.
From my experience, friends don't just stop being your friend, they drift apart over time. They could be considered old friends who you could see once every few months. Lack of communication is what happens. If people just "stop" being your friend even though you haven't really done anything to annoy you, then I don't think they were friends in the first place.
Any good luck with whatever you do ~~~