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hyperlexian
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22 Feb 2012, 3:13 pm

Wolfheart wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
females can sometimes be a sort of target, and if you add youth and AS to the mix it can be a draw for all the wrong kinds of attention.


I have no doubt in my mind that there are sexual predators that look for young naive girls to exploit emotionally, physically, sexually or mentally. I agree precautions must be taken under any circumstances as people can sometimes have an ulterior motive.

Hopefully all of this talk hasn't made beckym feel uncomfortable, unwelcome or awkward on this website or in a situation where she does become involved with someone genuine from this website but yes, she should take precautions and be careful if she does meet anyone from this website.

i hope this talk scares the heck out of her. i have had to deal with too many situations on here where people are actually victimised in one way or another (with spongy also alluded to). if i scare one person away from becoming a target, that's a job well done. it's one thing to post publicly and get support that way, and it's another thing to solicit contact via PM.


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spongy
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22 Feb 2012, 3:36 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
females can sometimes be a sort of target, and if you add youth and AS to the mix it can be a draw for all the wrong kinds of attention.


I have no doubt in my mind that there are sexual predators that look for young naive girls to exploit emotionally, physically, sexually or mentally. I agree precautions must be taken under any circumstances as people can sometimes have an ulterior motive.

Hopefully all of this talk hasn't made beckym feel uncomfortable, unwelcome or awkward on this website or in a situation where she does become involved with someone genuine from this website but yes, she should take precautions and be careful if she does meet anyone from this website.

i hope this talk scares the heck out of her. i have had to deal with too many situations on here where people are actually victimised in one way or another (with spongy also alluded to). if i scare one person away from becoming a target, that's a job well done. it's one thing to post publicly and get support that way, and it's another thing to solicit contact via PM.

Theres nothing wrong with contacting a member via pm regardless of your/their sex.
That being said you have to be carefull about things getting out of hand and you have to ask them to stop contacting you/report them if they dont.

On an ideal world this people that dont stop would be banned already problem is quite a lot of members think they dont have to report a member because they stopped contacting them as soon as they mentioned a mod. However that only means that this person is now most than likely looking for a new target.

Its very scary and its extremely hard to keep track of due to the fact that it goes unreported most of the times so quite alot of people get away with it for whatever reasons



Grisha
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22 Feb 2012, 3:57 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
females can sometimes be a sort of target, and if you add youth and AS to the mix it can be a draw for all the wrong kinds of attention.


I have no doubt in my mind that there are sexual predators that look for young naive girls to exploit emotionally, physically, sexually or mentally. I agree precautions must be taken under any circumstances as people can sometimes have an ulterior motive.

Hopefully all of this talk hasn't made beckym feel uncomfortable, unwelcome or awkward on this website or in a situation where she does become involved with someone genuine from this website but yes, she should take precautions and be careful if she does meet anyone from this website.

i hope this talk scares the heck out of her. i have had to deal with too many situations on here where people are actually victimised in one way or another (with spongy also alluded to). if i scare one person away from becoming a target, that's a job well done. it's one thing to post publicly and get support that way, and it's another thing to solicit contact via PM.


If there's this sort of actual "victimization" of women going on here, why has it not been addressed in a more general way?

You're doing a real disservice by keeping it quiet - what sorts of things are happening, specifically? obscene e-mails?



hyperlexian
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22 Feb 2012, 4:03 pm

Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
females can sometimes be a sort of target, and if you add youth and AS to the mix it can be a draw for all the wrong kinds of attention.


I have no doubt in my mind that there are sexual predators that look for young naive girls to exploit emotionally, physically, sexually or mentally. I agree precautions must be taken under any circumstances as people can sometimes have an ulterior motive.

Hopefully all of this talk hasn't made beckym feel uncomfortable, unwelcome or awkward on this website or in a situation where she does become involved with someone genuine from this website but yes, she should take precautions and be careful if she does meet anyone from this website.

i hope this talk scares the heck out of her. i have had to deal with too many situations on here where people are actually victimised in one way or another (with spongy also alluded to). if i scare one person away from becoming a target, that's a job well done. it's one thing to post publicly and get support that way, and it's another thing to solicit contact via PM.


If there's this sort of actual "victimization" of women going on here, why has it not been addressed in a more general way?

You're doing a real disservice by keeping it quiet - what sorts of things are happening, specifically? obscene e-mails?

same as what happens everywhere. if you google it you can get some ideas. i am planning to start a thread in L&D about dating/PM safety on WP, as i think there are special challenges here due to people's cognitive differences and misdirected sense of safety (it's a welcoming community in some ways)


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Grisha
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22 Feb 2012, 4:38 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
females can sometimes be a sort of target, and if you add youth and AS to the mix it can be a draw for all the wrong kinds of attention.


I have no doubt in my mind that there are sexual predators that look for young naive girls to exploit emotionally, physically, sexually or mentally. I agree precautions must be taken under any circumstances as people can sometimes have an ulterior motive.

Hopefully all of this talk hasn't made beckym feel uncomfortable, unwelcome or awkward on this website or in a situation where she does become involved with someone genuine from this website but yes, she should take precautions and be careful if she does meet anyone from this website.

i hope this talk scares the heck out of her. i have had to deal with too many situations on here
where people are actually victimised in one way or another (with spongy also alluded to). if i scare one person away from becoming a target, that's a job well done. it's one thing to post publicly and get support that way, and it's another thing to solicit contact via PM.


If there's this sort of actual "victimization" of women going on here, why has it not been addressed in a more general way?

You're doing a real disservice by keeping it quiet - what sorts of things are happening, specifically? obscene e-mails?

same as what happens everywhere. if you google it you can get some ideas. i am planning to start a thread in L&D about dating/PM safety on WP, as i think there are special challenges here due to people's cognitive differences and misdirected sense of safety (it's a welcoming community in some ways)


That sounds like a good idea for a sticky, but if something has happened involving WP members, it should be talked about specifically - no names of course, but just in general. Has someone been harmed physically or financially here?



hyperlexian
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22 Feb 2012, 4:41 pm

Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
females can sometimes be a sort of target, and if you add youth and AS to the mix it can be a draw for all the wrong kinds of attention.


I have no doubt in my mind that there are sexual predators that look for young naive girls to exploit emotionally, physically, sexually or mentally. I agree precautions must be taken under any circumstances as people can sometimes have an ulterior motive.

Hopefully all of this talk hasn't made beckym feel uncomfortable, unwelcome or awkward on this website or in a situation where she does become involved with someone genuine from this website but yes, she should take precautions and be careful if she does meet anyone from this website.

i hope this talk scares the heck out of her. i have had to deal with too many situations on here
where people are actually victimised in one way or another (with spongy also alluded to). if i scare one person away from becoming a target, that's a job well done. it's one thing to post publicly and get support that way, and it's another thing to solicit contact via PM.


If there's this sort of actual "victimization" of women going on here, why has it not been addressed in a more general way?

You're doing a real disservice by keeping it quiet - what sorts of things are happening, specifically? obscene e-mails?

same as what happens everywhere. if you google it you can get some ideas. i am planning to start a thread in L&D about dating/PM safety on WP, as i think there are special challenges here due to people's cognitive differences and misdirected sense of safety (it's a welcoming community in some ways)


That sounds like a good idea for a sticky, but if something has happened involving WP members, it should be talked about specifically - no names of course, but just in general. Has someone been harmed physically or financially here?

why are you asking that?


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Trigas
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22 Feb 2012, 4:42 pm

beckym wrote:
I feel like I need to add that I am not just a little naive aspie. I would NEVER meet up with anyone through the Internet. I am not stupid.


Not everyone that meets up with people from the internet is stupid. :?
I've met friends from online interaction to real life and they were certainly nice people.
Don't make generalizations. kthnxbai


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Grisha
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22 Feb 2012, 4:46 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
females can sometimes be a sort of target, and if you add youth and AS to the mix it can be a draw for all the wrong kinds of attention.


I have no doubt in my mind that there are sexual predators that look for young naive girls to exploit emotionally, physically, sexually or mentally. I agree precautions must be taken under any circumstances as people can sometimes have an ulterior motive.

Hopefully all of this talk hasn't made beckym feel uncomfortable, unwelcome or awkward on this website or in a situation where she does become involved with someone genuine from this website but yes, she should take precautions and be careful if she does meet anyone from this website.

i hope this talk scares the heck out of her. i have had to deal with too many situations on here
where people are actually victimised in one way or another (with spongy also alluded to). if i
scare one person away from becoming a target, that's a job well done. it's one thing to post publicly and get support that way, and it's another thing to solicit contact via PM.


If there's this sort of actual "victimization" of women going on here, why has it not been addressed in a more general way?

You're doing a real disservice by keeping it quiet - what sorts of things are happening, specifically? obscene e-mails?

same as what happens everywhere. if you google it you can get some ideas. i am planning to
start a thread in L&D about dating/PM safety on WP, as i think there are special challenges here due to people's cognitive differences and misdirected sense of safety (it's a welcoming community in some ways)


That sounds like a good idea for a sticky, but if something has happened involving WP members, it should be talked about specifically - no names of course, but just in general. Has someone been harmed physically or financially here?

why are you asking that?


Because if it did, I think the community ought to know, otherwise rumors and gossip will fill the void, otherwise it is irresponsible to allude to vague "incidents" like you mentioned.



hyperlexian
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22 Feb 2012, 4:50 pm

Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
females can sometimes be a sort of target, and if you add youth and AS to the mix it can be a draw for all the wrong kinds of attention.


I have no doubt in my mind that there are sexual predators that look for young naive girls to exploit emotionally, physically, sexually or mentally. I agree precautions must be taken under any circumstances as people can sometimes have an ulterior motive.

Hopefully all of this talk hasn't made beckym feel uncomfortable, unwelcome or awkward on this website or in a situation where she does become involved with someone genuine from this website but yes, she should take precautions and be careful if she does meet anyone from this website.

i hope this talk scares the heck out of her. i have had to deal with too many situations on here
where people are actually victimised in one way or another (with spongy also alluded to). if i
scare one person away from becoming a target, that's a job well done. it's one thing to post publicly and get support that way, and it's another thing to solicit contact via PM.


If there's this sort of actual "victimization" of women going on here, why has it not been addressed in a more general way?

You're doing a real disservice by keeping it quiet - what sorts of things are happening, specifically? obscene e-mails?

same as what happens everywhere. if you google it you can get some ideas. i am planning to
start a thread in L&D about dating/PM safety on WP, as i think there are special challenges here due to people's cognitive differences and misdirected sense of safety (it's a welcoming community in some ways)


That sounds like a good idea for a sticky, but if something has happened involving WP members, it should be talked about specifically - no names of course, but just in general. Has someone been harmed physically or financially here?

why are you asking that?


Because if it did, I think the community ought to know, otherwise rumors and gossip will fill the void, otherwise it is irresponsible to allude to vague "incidents" like you mentioned.

rumours and gossip will always happen, and we have no control over that. we will not address specific incidents publicly, now or ever.


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Grisha
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22 Feb 2012, 4:57 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Grisha wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
females can sometimes be a sort of target, and if you add youth and AS to the mix it can be a draw for all the wrong kinds of attention.


I have no doubt in my mind that there are sexual predators that look for young naive girls to exploit emotionally, physically, sexually or mentally. I agree precautions must be taken under any circumstances as people can sometimes have an ulterior motive.

Hopefully all of this talk hasn't made beckym feel uncomfortable, unwelcome or awkward on this website or in a situation where she does become involved with someone genuine from this website but yes, she should take precautions and be careful if she does meet anyone from this website.

i hope this talk scares the heck out of her. i have had to deal with too many situations on here
where people are actually victimised in one way or another (with spongy also alluded to). if i
scare one person away from becoming a target, that's a job well done. it's one thing to post publicly and get support that way, and it's another thing to solicit contact via PM.


If there's this sort of actual "victimization" of women going on here, why has it not been addressed in a more general way?

You're doing a real disservice by keeping it quiet - what sorts of things are happening, specifically? obscene e-mails?

same as what happens everywhere. if you google it you can get some ideas. i am planning to
start a thread in L&D about dating/PM safety on WP, as i think there are special challenges here due to people's cognitive differences and misdirected sense of safety (it's a welcoming community in some ways)


That sounds like a good idea for a sticky, but if something has happened involving WP members, it should be talked about specifically - no names of course, but just in general. Has someone been harmed physically or financially here?

why are you asking that?


Because if it did, I think the community ought to know, otherwise rumors and gossip will fill the void, otherwise it is irresponsible to allude to vague "incidents" like you mentioned.

rumours and gossip will always happen, and we have no control over that. we will not address specific incidents publicly, now or ever.


That sounds like a very sensible policy, but I would say that *alluding* to incidents, either real or not, can quickly turn a community into a cesspool of rumor, innuendo, and suspicion.

Yes, gossip will always happen, but that doesn't mean you should encourage it.



hyperlexian
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22 Feb 2012, 5:02 pm

i don't see where any allusions are happening right now, and the sticky i am composing would not allude to specific incidents and no examples would be given. it's about helping people to be proactive about safety on the site.


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Grisha
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22 Feb 2012, 5:07 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
i don't see where any allusions are happening right now, and the sticky i am composing would not allude to specific incidents and no examples would be given. it's about helping people to be proactive about safety on the site.


This is what I was referring to, earlier in this thread:

Hyperlexian wrote:
i have had to deal with too many situations on here where people are actually victimised in one way or another (with spongy also alluded to)


This seems to suggest multiple "situations" where people were "victimized" - maybe I misunderstood?



hyperlexian
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22 Feb 2012, 5:11 pm

yes, it has happened - there are multiple incidents where people have been victimised in various ways on the site. that is extremely inspecific, with no details or implications of anyone in particular. there will not be anything more specific under discussion.


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Grisha
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22 Feb 2012, 5:14 pm

Wrong Planet sounds like a really dangerous place, I had no idea...



Last edited by Grisha on 22 Feb 2012, 5:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.

hyperlexian
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22 Feb 2012, 5:15 pm

Grisha wrote:
Wrong Planet sounds like a really dangerous place! 8O

it is, just like any other internet forum.


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22 Feb 2012, 7:18 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
Grisha wrote:
Wrong Planet sounds like a really dangerous place! 8O

it is, just like any other internet forum.


And throw in the fact that people with aspergers have obsessive personalities.

And OP, I wasn't suggesting you're stupid. People can really make your life hard even if you don't meet them. I' sorry your thread has been blown out of proportion so much, if you're happy to deal with creeps then it's your choice, not ours.

And I wish you the best of luck, there are a lot of great people on here.