Board index › Coping in life › Social Skills and Making Friends

Getting citations from the smile police. Ugh!

Page 4 of 4 [ 51 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4

Previous topic | Next topic

This_Amoeba
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Dec 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 575
Location: Plum Island, NY

11 Mar 2017, 8:22 pm

When I worked as a cashier I often got requests from men to smile, never women. They would often say "smile, it's not that bad," or "you look grumpy, smile for me." I usually responded by telling them that "I am not grumpy" or "I am smiling," then they would get all pissy and complain to the manager.



jrjones9933
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 May 2011
Age: 56
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,144
Location: The end of the northwest passage

12 Mar 2017, 3:07 am

This_Amoeba wrote:
When I worked as a cashier I often got requests from men to smile, never women. They would often say "smile, it's not that bad," or "you look grumpy, smile for me." I usually responded by telling them that "I am not grumpy" or "I am smiling," then they would get all pissy and complain to the manager.

That sounds both manipulative and discriminatory. Women in service jobs must seem like easy targets to creeps.


_________________
"I find that the best way [to increase self-confidence] is to lie to yourself about who you are, what you've done, and where you're going." - Richard Ayoade


Summer_Twilight
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 Sep 2011
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,295

12 Mar 2017, 8:25 am

When people do this, it's one of my pet peeves because it's not only patronizing but controlling as well.

Years ago I worked at an airport in a food court when I was nearly 21. During those days, I functioned at the level of a 14 year old. This one time I sassed off at one of the managers because he was being condescending about talking during work after I made a general comment to a girl who I normally got along with. So I said, "Whatever" which I learned is a form of disrespect. So I tried to apologize but he said that it didn't cut it and started crying.

We also were affiliated with a bar and grill that had people coming into out side all the time. So one of the servers told me, "Turn that frown upside down." To me, it was another barb and it was something that I did not want to hear because I was already feeling humiliated.