How common is this in adult NT cliques?

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Loulas
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19 Jul 2009, 1:21 pm

For example, in the workplace or college, do you think there is a tendency to go right along with one person's dislike or exclusion of another which to other people looks like nothing short of persecution?



studentM
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19 Jul 2009, 2:09 pm

Absolutely.



Marcia
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19 Jul 2009, 3:16 pm

I don't think it is restricted to adults or to NTs.



Ruchard
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19 Jul 2009, 7:31 pm

aspie's can have cliques as well not just NT'S



Loulas
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21 Jul 2009, 4:01 pm

Thanks for the responses. I wasn't making the assumption that Aspies are incapable of snobbery, immaturity, narrow-mindedness or any characteristics typical of cliques, but there is rarely a high enough concentration of Aspies in one place for them to be able to form a clique. Never having known another Aspie personally (to my knowledge), I don't know what the chances are of being able to integrate into a clique. It was probably unnecessary to make that specification about NTs though.



Last edited by Loulas on 21 Jul 2009, 4:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.

studentM
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21 Jul 2009, 4:18 pm

Loulas wrote:
I don't what the chances are of being able to integrate into a clique.


Well, a clique by definition is an exclusive group of people with something in common. That in and of itself isn't a bad thing, but in modern terms, most cliques think of themselves as superior on some level and exclude people.

So, even if you could, you probably wouldn't want to integrate into a group like that.



Feyhera
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22 Jul 2009, 4:51 am

Here's a definition of the word "clique":

"a group of people who are friendly with each other but exclude others"

Exclusion is not cool.

Looking back to my high school years, using my current understanding of the world, I can see now that the whole reason I never fit into any clique was because I didn't fit the criteria of typical members, that is, (A) I never had the sense that by demeaning and rejecting others I would feel superior, and, (B) I never had a need to feel superior. In my mind's eye, I can re-evaluate those "cool girls" and see now that they were pretty insecure and shallow and just not the kind of people I could ever be interested in as friends, even then. They were, for the most part, superficial in their relationships within their cliques, and all of them suffered from not knowing from one minute to the next if they would be "in" or "out", a reality I just couldn't bear to share with them. I spent my time focusing on my music, writing, art and figure skating and became rather accomplished at all of them, while, at school, I watched from the fringes with morbid curiosity, as those emotionally distraught popular girls struggled to maintain their tenuous positions within the cliques. It looked exhausting and ingenuine and the pay-off just didn't seem very appealing to me. I thank the younger version of me now, even if, back then, I thought there must be "something wrong with me" that I didn't "fit in". The teenager I was had good instincts by just staying away from all that and choosing to have only a few really close friends who didn't judge or tease or ostracize me. I'm actually Godmother to one of their children and we're still friends to this day!

I wonder where those tortured popular girls are now and what they're up to... I'm pretty sure that most went on to college, got married and had kids just like me. So, in the end, I didn't miss a thing by not "fitting in".


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DaWalker
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22 Jul 2009, 5:17 am

I have never and still don't fit in with the "clique".

Main reason is I don't show any interest.

The other is the fact that do not discriminate "outsiders". Truth is I talk to the very wealthy or the average Joe with the same attitude. Social status or lack thereof has never made a difference to me, these things go against the rules. People are people, gay, straight, black, white or anybody in between. What really separates me the most, is I try not to participate in the rumor machine, just because someone tells me "it's a well-known fact that blahh x3", I don't take them seriously at all. Fact is, it's their opinion, this pisses off some people as well. I wonder why I'm a loner :lol:



J-P
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23 Jul 2009, 5:21 pm

DaWalker wrote:
I have never and still don't fit in with the "clique".

Main reason is I don't show any interest.


Exactly same for me. i'm totally uninteresting because of my passion for computer,grey cats,videogames and general thing like street name,history,politic and how thing is made. I was friend with a guy of my age and his brothers but suddenly, he practically not talk to me, his brothers neither. i discovery they forget me for more recently know friends. After over 10 years i know him. I know...Painful...in family i know many clique. I think NT are more subject to clique.