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Sati
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17 Oct 2009, 12:09 am

Turning acquaintances into friends - how do you do this? I have many acquaintances, but few few friends. I don't know how to switch the relationship over :? What steps can I do to get closer to a person? How can I find out of if any of them are interested in being friends with me?



sciencepanda
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17 Oct 2009, 1:06 am

If you feel that you aren't ready to just talk to them outright, ask for their IM address and periodically say hello through that. It tends to be considerable easier to chat with people when they aren't face to face.

And then, after a while, if you seem to be getting along well, ask if they'd like to hang out in person. I've generally had pretty consistent success with this.



Homer_Bob
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17 Oct 2009, 5:47 pm

I haven't been able to figure out that transition for over 15 years. I wish you luck.



Seanmw
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18 Oct 2009, 3:43 am

sciencepanda wrote:
If you feel that you aren't ready to just talk to them outright, ask for their IM address and periodically say hello through that. It tends to be considerable easier to chat with people when they aren't face to face.

And then, after a while, if you seem to be getting along well, ask if they'd like to hang out in person. I've generally had pretty consistent success with this.
agreed. i also use myspace for this purpose. much success


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Dancyclancy
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18 Oct 2009, 5:54 am

Don't know! If the acquaintance is a bit weird I reckon you've got better chance than if NT.

Have you checked out if you like the same stuff such as type of movies, activities, etc. Then you could suggest to do something together. If that works you could ask if they would like to eg see such and such a movie, or have another game of whatever next week or so !
Let the other person then make the next move.....

"Give me a call when you want to catch a movie"! (example only) :idea:

If they don't call after a few weeks you could call them and suggest something.....if they don't seem interested don't push it. Leave it to them to make the next move...they may or may not and take it from there.
I DIDN'T DO THIS TYPE OF THING AND MADE ALL THE MOVES , NOT OFTEN BUT ALWAYS AND I DIDN"T WAKE UP THAT IT WAS ALL ONE WAY......."TILL MUCH LATER ON. :cry:



HereComeTheLizards
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18 Oct 2009, 11:49 am

I prefer acquaintances. They're less demanding. One or two friends is good, but more than that and my time and energy start ebbing away.


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pavel_filonov
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18 Oct 2009, 1:44 pm

I prefer to let it happen very gradually over time, by gradually getting to know better people who I like out of my wider friendship group. I find that easier to manage, and it means I don't accidentally fall in with people I turn out to have nothing in common with.

I guess I'm pretty bad at it too!! ! But in general I'd say that if you can have a relatively long, free flowing conversation with someone, they're probably interested in being friends with you too. Maybe start talking about bands you want to see/films you like the look of and see if they show an interest in any of it?