How do i make friends?

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There is an autism speaks walk in my area. and i am going in hopes there will be someone my own age who i can be friends with. I will only hang out with females because i get hit on by guys.

I have no friends and everyone i know is online. i know no one in real life.

How do i meet people? I haven't had any friends since high school.

I want a friend my own age who is a girl, who will be understanding of my problems. I cant find anyone my age to talk to and i don't know how to make friends .

There is no aspergers group in my area and i don't work, so that's not an option.

Any advice.

Its lonely when you spend all day alone in your room.

Um, when I did have a job a girl (As a friend) gave me her number and still tried to text me after work. So I guess thats what'd you call a friend.

Same thing when I was in college, classes that you're interested in generally put you in contact with people who share common interests.

I'd also try to get a job or try to get involved in school or anything that interests you. Even if you don't get all buddy-buddy with a guy, they can still be nice as an acquaintance. If they get pushy or show interest, just turn them down. Or if it comes up, tell them I have a bf. If you just don't want to take the chance then yeah, stick to your comfort zone. Just in a work setting, its better to get along for the sake of getting along.

But I guess the point of all of this is, you simply have to put yourself out there more, find things you're comfortable with for example if you can't stand being around large groups of people (Like me) then find activities or even a job that'll put you in a smaller setting.

Is there a reason you're unable to work btw?

Also the autism speaks thing sounds like a great start.

So i should find an activity that i can meet like minded people? sounds like a good idea. But i have trouble finding an activity that people my age do. I tried church but it was mostly people 40 and over. I'm 22 and i have no clue what people my age do for fun. I don't like clubs or concerts and i don't drink or smoke. i don't know what else people my age do other then these things. I'm so in the dark about my age group.


I'm on dissablity because i cant work. (I actually dont go out of my room much either) I couldn't put my finger on what i find hard about working and going out side. I even find it stressful just going to the doctors appointments. I cant do to much without getting overwhelmed and I'm not sure why.

I also cant figure out how to go from stranger to best friends with someone. Either they are my best friend or not my friend at all. And i don't know what to do around people. i don't know what is expected of me. I am so confused on this subject.

I just don't understand why people with AS can work and i cant seem to manage it. I just don't know. its like I'm not as able as most of you guys.


I even struggle to write my posts in a way that will make scence. I feel like everything is 10 times harder for me then most people and i have no clue why.

Well, I wouldn't necessarily say working was easy. Truth be told, minimum wage laborers normally go greatly unappreciated no matter how hard they work. For me, I felt I needed to be employee of the year, with unlimited paid vacation. Socializing was difficult, customers complaining all the time was difficult, etc.

I needed to drink coffee regularly not for the energy boost but because coffee speeds up the rate in which your brain processes thoughts. Which for me is needed, because I get a failing grade when it comes to multitasking. It helped tremendously, but I became over dependent on it.

As far as knowing how to act, like if you meet someone at your autism speaks walk. (Which I assume will have either other people on the autistic spectrum or people who know someone who has autism)

Try introducing yourself, "Hey my name is so-so, whats yours? *They answer* Try asking how they're enjoying themselves or why they're at the autism speaks walk. *They answer* Now here's a followup that will throw them for a loop. (If you're even interested in talking to them more)

You can say "Ohh well i'm here to meet people, I actually have autism" Or if you don't want to reveal personal information you can ask them if anyone they know has autism or if they themselves have it.

Due to the fact that you identify with aspergers as proven by your post here, you can have a lot to ask or say.

Also keep in mind, you can be as social as you want to be. What you've said here, has shown us a very interesting person. If you meet someone you can ask what they do for fun, then after they finish whether they ask or not you can say

" i have trouble finding an activity that people my age do. I tried church but it was mostly people 40 and over. I'm 22 and i have no clue what people my age do for fun. I don't like clubs or concerts and i don't drink or smoke. i don't know what else people my age do other then these things. I'm so in the dark about my age group. "

Which is basically what you've said here--that alone will open up a conversation, in some instances because a lot of people relate to that without having AS.

Despite having social deficit try putting your best foot forward to not be self conscious, things back fire and sometimes things don't work out the way you planned. Keep trying different approaches if they don't.

Also as someone who's dealt in customer service and had to force myself to make small talk, I can tell you to keep in mind, if someone doesn't respond the way you want, aren't friendly or aren't talkative. Do not take it to heart! Every single person is different, this isn't something to cheer you up incase of failure, this is fact. There are people who will socialize and talk your ear off without trying, there are people who will ignore you even if you look like a super model and have a brain the size of einstein.

Ignore the negative and reach for the positive, you are only looking to befriend people who like you for you in the first place. Even if your best attempt fails, do not allow it to cause you to quit and give up.

I heard that there are "dating" sites for girls to meet girls. Not lesbian sites but to meet girls who are looking friends. If you see someone in your area with similar interests you can message each other and agree to meet up on a "girl date" and see if you want to be friends.

I doubt the male equivalent exists. No matter how lonely I am I would never go on anything termed a "Man Date".